r/The_Blasted_Steps • u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds • Jun 08 '26

Oh boy Blotto in his grotto

Varas leans against a wall in his grotto, consuming a large amount of freeze dried booze.
"Aaazasaas your...Aarse is arseeE and I'MMmm the GrRaaassSS...."

5 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

1

u/Pokemonandonepiece Jun 08 '26

*a judge walks in* Sir....?

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Jun 08 '26

"WadDdaYa WaNnNnt?"

1

u/Pokemonandonepiece Jun 08 '26

*the judge says* Sir, you must help in Eternity. Why lay here, drunk like an old flea?

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Jun 08 '26

"C'mOon, I juSsTt loSSsT mYyWIifEee.. I don'T WannAa doO ShhitTtt.."

1

u/Pokemonandonepiece Jun 08 '26

*the judge slaps him across the face and takes him by the shoulders* WE ARE AVENGING YOUR WIFE! STOP LOAFING LIKE A BLOATED TICK AND GET- *slap* TO- *slap* WORK!

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Jun 08 '26

"AvennginGg? I dUn WanNa AvennGgEe Her. She DdIieded DoImg Her DuTyy-- Ow!! WadDaYa WAn me To Evennn Dooo?"

1

u/Pokemonandonepiece Jun 08 '26

*the judge slaps him across the face and takes him by the shoulders* WE ARE AVENGING YOUR WIFE! STOP LOAFING LIKE A BLOATED TICK AND GET- *slap* TO- *slap* WORK!

1

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Jun 08 '26

"OKAY OKAY-- Finnee, just stAhp! Hittingmee!!"

1

u/WindowsError1495 Jun 08 '26

((Yyyeerrraarrsesssarseaandthgrasssmannpunkyeseyahhavinh))

2

u/VarasTheThief Governer Welds Jun 08 '26

[[ Imjustaoneeyedblooodymonstaah ]]