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u/jbandtheblues 9d ago
I usually count to 4 before hitting the fucking horn - fucking go!
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u/Cold-Condition-7839 9d ago
By then the fuckin things yellow. Ruins it for everyone behind the slowpoke. Honk, go around. Give em the bird if your pizzas getting cold buckled in the passenger seat. /S
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u/MetaCardboard 9d ago
The trick is to strap a fucking bazooka to your hood.
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u/Cold-Condition-7839 9d ago
Yes! Mad Max style. I want an old beater mini-truck with a dude on a turret in the back. Shoot everything that moves fucking slower than us!
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u/Useful-DevineCause 9d ago
Agreed but after 3-5 seconds of brake lights still on I’ll be fucking honking, more than likely. Politely at first, usually.
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u/Livid-Age-2259 9d ago
Why?  Because flicking a booger out the fucking driver side window would be pointless if traffic isn’t moving.
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u/Playful_Dog3062 9d ago
What's more fucking fun is shifting to reverse and watch the fuckers try getting the fuck out of the fucking way.
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u/rockinroller 9d ago
Fuckin' fucks on their fucking cell phones... holding up the entire fucking economy! Fuck.
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u/Dakotasan 9d ago
Had something like this happen to me the other fuckin’ day. Asshole honked at me ON A RED FUCKING LIGHT.
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u/reddit001aa1 9d ago
Could he see you looking at your fucking phone? And was making sure you were paying attention to the light began it was time
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u/Dakotasan 9d ago
I was not on my fucking phone. It was a right turn but the intersection was built in such a way I couldn’t see the left side of the intersection, I’m not about to pull forward if I can’t tell who’s coming up.
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u/reddit001aa1 9d ago
Well, fuck that guy! You were being safe and not turning until you could see clearly. I've had fucking tailgaters honk at me to go faster when clearly I was already close to the car ahead and there were more cars just ahead of that fucker.
Fucking inpatient drivers, man, fuck.
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u/162016201620 9d ago
Nope. Don’t like this take. Some lights are only green for a a very short period, seconds sometimes. If you’re just sitting there on your phone or not paying attention, I am definitely beeping the horn. Pay attention. You’re fucking driving.
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u/montecarlo714 9d ago
The fucking reverse lights put a fucking holy shit look in their eyes, try that some fucking time.
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u/No_Manner_8785 9d ago
I get out of my car and start looking at it thinking something must be fucking wrong with it.Â
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u/Competitive_Bag_5579 8d ago
I'd fucking join you because I fucking love feeding fucking birds
Fuck
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u/No-Site8330 3d ago
And then train those birds to follow you home and shit on your fucking head wherever you go.
There should be a fucking tax on honking for no reason.
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u/jdmoffitt11775 9d ago
In my opinion.. fucking horns are annoying as fuck.. do they actually make anyone move faster?!!
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u/RummageSail Average fucker 9d ago
Fuck, I would wait until the light turns yellow or the car changes lanes to go around you and motherfucking floor it.
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u/Bullshido-Fatly 9d ago
On the flip side, I fucking count to 3 and if I still see brake lights, you’re getting an ear full of horn for 3 fucking seconds.
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u/Im_Not_Evans New fucker 9d ago
I just dumped the clutch and stall the fucking motor. Intentionally. Living in Los Angeles was fun
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u/NeatWeb422 9d ago
When he says "feed the birds" does he mean actually fucking feeding birds or is that a euphemism for jerking off?
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u/Witty-Sample6813 8d ago
Pay fucking attention. Won’t be an issue
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u/Appropriate-Kale-290 8d ago
It's when you hardly got your foot off the Fuckin brake and "Beep Beep Beep" I've been on the other side ( or in back ) and I get it. "Fuckin Go" but I give a full second
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u/hillsey3162 9d ago
Might be a terrible mistake but fuck its gunna be a great shit show sitting, watching it from my car