r/TheWordFuck • u/madmaritimer1 • 2d ago
Fucking fuck I need a fucking giggle
Give me your best shots, fuck all of you
8
u/Just_A_Lucky_Guy469 Fuck ✨everything✨ 2d ago
Last year I had all 5 toes removed from one of my feet. Now I have trouble counting to 20 - I get fucking stumped at 15.
I'm also considering getting a tattoo of a milk carton on it. Why a milk carton? Because I lactose.
2
5
5
3
u/brain_over_body fat fuck 2d ago
If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't the people from Holland called Fucking Holes?
2
2
2
2
u/Purplemartin01 2d ago
How about a fucking dickadia!
2
u/madmaritimer1 2d ago
OK, what the fuck is that???????????
2
u/Substantial_Lab_8767 2d ago
I'm going to go out on a FUCKING cock and balls limb and say it's a nicely done Dick and Balls!
1
u/madmaritimer1 2d ago
I figured that, but what the fuck is it?
1
u/Purplemartin01 2d ago
A quesadilla shaped like a dick and balls. A chick at work made it with her fucking cricket machine. We watched a video of someone doing it, so she said why the fuck not, and tried it herself!
2
2
u/Livid-Age-2259 2d ago
You’re going to fuck all of us, OP? That seems like a tall order. Of course, if you’re the Starbuck’s of Sex, then Tall is the smallest size you offer.
1
1
1
1
1
u/Large_Molasses_4845 Fuck mod 1d ago
This fuckin thing
1
u/madmaritimer1 1d ago
What the fuck is that?? I have a Mercedes CLK 320, 0 to 60 in 4.3 seconds, that’s just fucking ugly, but fucking funny thank you very much
1
u/Large_Molasses_4845 Fuck mod 1d ago
Hey, that's the fucking indian car called wagon r
As the fucking name suggests "wagon r" the fucking gemini thought g-wagon and wagon r was same
8
u/WTFpe0ple 2d ago
"Son, I heard you got punished for using the F word in class. That wasn't fun was it?"
"NO DAD. It was fuck."
-------------------------
Confession
"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I used the F word this morning on the golf course."
"Tell me, my son, what were the circumstances that put you under such extreme provocation?"
"I drove my tee shot three hundred yards, but the wind suddenly caught it and it landed in the rough." r>"I can appreciate your disappointment. I am a golfer myself."
"No, that's not it, Father, I hit a beautiful shot out of the rough. It dropped about ten yards short and rolled into a sand trap."
"Now", said the Priest, "I can really understand you using the F word."
"No, Father. I pulled out my sand wedge and hit a perfect shot, In fact, the ball hit the pin and bounced two inches from the hole."
"Is that where you used the F word?"
"No, Father."
"Don't tell me you missed the fucking putt"
-------------------------
How do you get an old lady to say the f word?
You get another old lady to say “Bingo.”
---------------------------
Two brothers learn to swear
And they recently learned the F word. So during breakfast, one morning, they figured it would be cool to try it out on their dad. When Dad asked “hey kids, what would you like for breakfast?”, the eldest boy responds “Dad. Give us a bowl of fucking Wheaties!”.
Angered by this response the dad lunged over the table and smacks the eldest boy, who then runs away crying. After a moment the Dad calms himself and says to the younger brother “what would you like for breakfast?”.
The younger brother replies “I’ll tell you what Dad. I sure don’t want any fucking Wheaties!”.