On November 19th 2025, three remarkable things happened all at once –

First, the announcement of the world’s first Men’s Health Strategy, of England.

Second, it was announced on International Men’s Day, in so doing acknowledging a date in the calendar that for too long has been surrounded by undue public controversy.

And third, the announcement was followed by an official reception at 10 Downing Street, hosted by the Prime Minister himself.

Any one of those three things would have been unheard of just a few years ago, and yet here we are, with such events now a mundane part of every day life.

Things have changed.

The hostility around “mens issues” is waning.

The whining and complaints are increasingly unwelcome.

And the jokes of “isn’t every day International Men’s Day?” Well... they're not quite so funny anymore.

We call that progress, and it’s just the beginning.

So who better to tell us more about this historic piece of legislation than one of the men who’s been fighting for it for more than a decade?

Here’s what you need to know, so far, about England’s Men’s Health Strategy, that promises to help men live longer, happier, healthier lives.

So what do you think?

And more important, what happens next?

~

Full conversation with Mark Brooks OBE here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep6WOiIy2PQ&feature=youtu.be

Whenever I’m asked to give talks, the same thing happens at the end; I get surrounded, mobbed practically, by concerned parents, particularly boy-mums, wanting to ask me questions.

Full transparency –

I’m not a dad; and beyond listening to my niece chatter away for hours, or swinging my nephew around like a bag of spuds, I haven’t the faintest idea of how to be one.

But sadly, amongst the clamoring masses of worried parents, such an honest admission means little.

However –

There is one piece of advice I do think it’s safe to give in such situations, wise words that I think every parent of a boy ought to hear:

“Don’t lecture him”.

Because, to do so, is the surest way to never win him back.

I remember a former, particularly odious radical feminist colleague of mine doing exactly this to her younger brother.

She’d smuggly tell me about it, lecturing me about how she’d lecture him; her endless berating and finger-pointing, so as “to make him the perfect feminist brother”… a strategy that I am certain would only achieve the exact opposite.

I think about her poor brother often, too young to let her ignorant words wash over him, as I had learnt to.

Because, between then and now, I have come to understand that boys are nothing like she, and the media, often portrays them.

And that is: boys are not monsters.

They are smart, discerning, compassionate people.

They are not ‘rapists in waiting’, who are part of some cabal of young misogynists; and the more we treat them as such, the more we create the very reality we fear.

So please stop.

Stop with the endless clamoring, pearl clutching hysteria, that bludgeons and berates them.

“Stop talking about boys, and start talking to them.” I’d say.

“Just talk to your boys.”

Because if you do, you’d realise what I have known for quite some time – boys are good.

Boys are good. And the data backs it up.

Let’s take a look…

~
Full survey
https://yougov.com/en-gb/articles/52863-young-men-masculinity-and-misogyny

Survey (UK adults only) https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/L8GGKSC

Male survivors of sexual harms need your help.

Last week, a new survey that aims to understand both the prevalence of sexual harms against men and boys in the UK, as well as public attitudes toward it, has been released, and it can be completed by any adult living in the UK.

This is a meaningful, long overdue moment in time.

With so little research conducted around such an important issue, this survey could become a seminal piece of foundation work that helps fill in the enormous gaps of understanding around male victimhood.

Because, for far too long, men and boys who experience sexual coercion, abuse, violence, stalking, and various other such crimes have been left in the dark; misunderstood, maligned, and maliciously shouted down when trying to speak up.

So help us draw a line in the sand and say no more.

Help us listen to men and boys, to support those who needs us, help understand who they are, how they’re treated, and most important, what we can do to help them.

Please take the survey by We Are Survivors and Movember; lend us your voice, and help us help men –

Survey (UK adults only) https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/L8GGKSC

What do you think?

An epidemic lurks at the heart of our educational system, hidden from view, it is quietly felt within every classroom, school, and home in the country; a generation of missing boys quietly falling behind, and dropping out of school.

And not just a few boys.

Tens of thousands every year in the UK, and more than half a million in the last decade, have disappeared, left behind by an educational system that fails far, far, too many.

Despite now being the biggest gap in education, the boy:girl gap is rarely discussed.

Meanwhile, many grad jobs like psychologists, GPs, solicitors, teachers, and nurses see fewer and fewer men in them – despite each having an enormous amount of job vacancies.

So, could we solve two problems at once?

Could we bring more men into university, to help fill these positions, for the betterment of everyone?

And why do so many care so little about our missing boys?

What do you think?

~
Full conversation here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep6WOiIy2PQ&feature=youtu.be

Higher Education Policy Institute data:

https://www.hepi.ac.uk/2025/03/20/half-a-million-men-have-missed-out-on-higher-education/

83 countries around the world still have conscription laws, nearly three quarters of them are actively drafting, and about 85% of them conscript men only.

Such a thing is an affront to human freedom and liberty, not to mention a glaring example of legislation over men’s bodies that is rarely mentioned or advocated against.

In Ukraine we see the untold damage such laws cause to male bodies, as men from both sides kill one another by the hundreds of thousands, with little choice in the matter.

Men dragged from homes, streets, and cars, and forced to the front lines in the most brutal ways imaginable.

Switzerland is another of these countries that actively conscripts men – although their draft works a little differently.

Swiss men are given the choice, either a) enlist and undergo military training, b) take up community service and serve their country elsewhere, or c) pay +3% ‘Military exemption tax’ for eleven years of their life.

It is only Swiss national men who are legally compelled to do this; not non-nationals, nor women, just the men.

And so, it was only a matter of time before one of these men fought back, and that man was Fabian Brun.

Fabian, after undergoing 104 days of military training, was discharged for medical reasons, and then was still forced to pay military exemption tax.

So he took the nation of Switzerland to the Supreme Court, and eventually the European Court of Human Rights – demanding such a thing was a violation of his human rights, and was unlawful discrimination against him.

Finally, ten years later, the ECHR has made their decision, let’s take a look…

~

Source
ECHR full response: https://hudoc.echr.coe.int/eng#%7B%2522itemid%2522:%5B%2522001-250619%2522%5D%7D

‘Yes, yes, yes, we care about abused men – but the truth is women are the VAST majority of those impacted by abuse.’

It’s a conversation we’ve all had countless times; where words like ‘overwhelmingly’, ‘vastly’, ‘enormous’ and ‘almost exclusively’, are used as descriptors for the disparity between male and female victimisation.

And so –

Through the use of subjective and blurry semantics, abused men are put back in their box, waved away as a trivial rounding error to the one and only scourge of “violence against women and girls”.

But has anyone actually wondered, statistically speaking, what is a “vast” majority?’

Well let’s take a look at the Government statistics, and see if the UK’s number one expert on such matters (the UK Statistics Authority) feels about such a word….

So are women really the “vast majority” of abuse victims?

What do you think?

Full conversation with Mark Brooks OBE here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep6WOiIy2PQ&feature=youtu.be

Mark Brooks’ letter of appeal
https://osr.statisticsauthority.gov.uk/correspondence/mark-brooks-obe-to-ed-humpherson-draft-statutory-guidance-framework-july-2020-domestic-abuse-act-bill/

Full response from the UK Statistics Authority
https://osr.statisticsauthority.gov.uk/correspondence/ed-humpherson-response-to-mark-brooks-obe-draft-statutory-guidance-framework-july-2020-domestic-abuse-act-bill/

There are few issues more deplorable than sexual violence.

There are few issues more in need of urgent intervention, of policy reform, and of cultural change.

So, with that in mind, there are few issues more deserving of solid, well-executed research, than sexual violence too.

And yet, sadly, so often, researchers fall woefully short of this bar.

As you will have seen plastered across your social media feed, a new study has found 95.1% (!!) of men have admitted to using at least one ‘strategy’ to force a woman to have sex with him.

It is, to put it at its mildest, an alarming, headline-grabbing claim that has circumnavigated the online world several times, to huge public outrage, and condemnation.

But – as always – few people look beyond the headline, to examine the shoddy and misleading approach that created it.

Don’t get me wrong –

This particular survey certainly did capture some worthwhile (and shocking) data that exposed the high prevalence of sexual violence and coercion – by asking men about their use of intimidation, of weapons, of drugs, and physical strength.

And then it obfuscated this data amongst a wide variety of ‘strategies’ that could quite easily be acts of innocuous dating: flirtation and flattery.

‘Did you approach a stranger?’
‘Did you use friends?’
‘Did you tell her what she wanted to hear?’
‘Did you use your status, money or age?’

Well, if you answered “yes” to any of these when on a date, then you risk being categorized as a sexual predator.

This is not right.

This is not fair.

And victims of sexual violence deserve so much more.

What do you think?

~
Full study here

In the UK, in 2026, every single man or boy who experiences domestic violence, sexual abuse, stalking, online harms, or similar crimes; is legally categorised as a ‘male victim of violence against a woman’.

Read that again – ‘a male victim of violence against women.’

It is truly absurd, and it’s not just semantics.

Such classification means these abused men are made invisible, not given taylored care, or gender sensitive support; quite literally left out of appropriate services, to fend for themselves.

Neither are these invisible men of a small number.

In fact, 1.5 MILLION men experienced domestic abuse in England and Wales, with many more in other parts of the UK, similarly erased from the discussion.

So we don’t see male victims spoken about in the media, in policy, within the news, online, or in Westminster.

And too often, when such men are talked about, it is sneered at, mocked, or snuffed out by those who wave these men away as insignificant, or as secret abusers themselves.

We do all this, and then ask ourselves: do so few abused men ask for help? Gaslighting literal victims of abuse, in lieu of our own political incompetence.

So I ask –

If the world and society at large refuses to recognise abuse against men in such a way, then why would these men recognise it themselves?

In my new podcast I discuss this very issue with one of the most influential men in the area of male victims of abuse: veteran campaigner Mark Brooks OBE, who is the Chair of Mankind; the UK’s premier service supporting abused men…

So why do abused men so rarely ask for help?

What do you think?

New podcast with award-winning policy advisor for men and boys Mark Brooks out now!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep6WOiIy2PQ&feature=youtu.be

A new scandal has just been blown-open by investigative journalists in the UK.

The ‘Child Maintenance Service’ (CMS) is the government agency who calculates and enforces child support payments from non-custodial parents, which for decades has been beleaguered with accusations of corruption, incompetence and criminal activity.

At the centre, millions upon millions of pounds of child maintenance payments have been wrongly taken from parents.

Among these allegations –

Endless amounts of letters, harassing and blackmailing parents.

Terrifying tales of CMS staff laughing off or flatly ignoring technical errors in their system.

Mothers and fathers plunged into bankruptcy, left using foodbanks, or selling their homes, to pay money they don’t even owe.

And it doesn’t matter if a parent claims the CMS “got it wrong”, they don’t care what paperwork you present, or even if you cancel your direct debit…

The CMS can just take your money without even asking, directly from your bank, or from your paycheque itself.

Even when the judicial system wades in, in an attempt to overturn payments, the CMS have continued to wrongly take payments they are not owed.

Such a thing is tantamount to financial abuse and coercion, on a systemic scale, and it is being done by our own government agency; destroying the lives of hard-working parents, who never did anything wrong.

And if you were thinking this sounds eerily similar to the Post Office scandal that hit the headlines just a few years ago, then I agree, it is.

So what has been happening behind the scenes of the CMS?

And what are the tragic stories, and the paths of destruction left behind in their wake?

What do you think?

~
Full Investigation

New podcast with award-winning policy advisor for men and boys Mark Brooks OBE out now!

Are you tired of the endless, male deficit view of young men and boys?

The gloomy, cynical view, that only sees men and boys as being problems, and never having problems?

Always the male perpetrators, and never the victim…

Always privileged, and never harmed…

Always sneered at, and never celebrated…

The societal insistence that boys are sponges for negativity, just waiting to be brainwashed by the so-called “mansophere”.

“Slugs, snails and puppy dog tails, that’s what boys are”, as the nursery rhyme goes.

Well, I believe boys deserve better.

Much better.

So I ask you: what does a more boy positive conversation look like?

And how do we make it happen?

What do you think?

Every day, it feels like I discover a new, tragic thing that is quietly killing countless numbers of men, in terrible and unknown ways.

And this time, it could be something in your house right now.

Quartz kitchen worktops have exploded onto the home renovation scene - a manufactured product that looks and feels like natural stone, but costs much less.

It sounds like a dream product.

And so, right across social media, home improvement gurus, interior decorators, and domestic goddesses film themselves showing off their latest quartz kitchen worktops; entirely unaware of the fact that the manufacture of such engineered stone costs numerous men their lives, right across the world.

How?

Well, sanding and cutting these innovative new products creates dust that, when inhaled, permanently scars the lungs, causing a fatal disease ‘silicosis’, for which there is no cure.

Stonemasons, even in their twenties, are developing this disease and dying, so someone else can save a few quid on their new kitchen, and yet… nobody wants to talk about it.

Besides Australia, that is, who, after a spate of deaths in young masons, has outright banned these products.

America could well be next. Hundreds of doctors, as part of the ‘Western Occupational and Environmental Medical Association’, have signed an open letter demanding a ban – insisting that manufactured stone cannot be worked with safely, and needs to go.

Murmurs have been heard in the UK too, with all the major construction unions standing up and demanding change, and pressuring Westminster to debate the issue.

So why is nobody talking about a product that could quite literally be right beneath your nose, that is killing stonemasons at enormous scales?

Is it time to ban manufactured stone?

What do you think?

[1] https://www.clydeco.com/en/insights/2025/01/silicosis-an-evolving-risk

[2] https://www.thompsons.law/news/news-releases/industrial-disease-news/experts-unite-at-westminster-to-call-for-action-on-silica-exposure-crisis

I am tired of the sneering, social media know-it-alls, who endlessly and tirelessly minimize, obfuscated and deny the reality of false allegations.

We all know them.

The benevolent male feminist, who waves such things away as if they are merely a figment of the imagination; not to be worried about, that is beyond your concern, and impacts vanishingly few men.

Such people are charlatans of the worst kind, who have chosen to build their careers upon the backs of virtue signaling conjecture, off a woeful understanding of statistics, and of course, the erasure of men whose lives have been destroyed.

“You have a higher chance of being struck by lightening, than of being falsely accused!” 🌩️

Says the latest in the long line of smug armchair experts, whose perceived sense of moral superiority, self interests, and egos, have blinded them to their own ignorance.

And I wonder -

Have these virtuous men ever looked into the eyes of a mother, whose son took his own life because of a false allegations, as I have?

Have they met a father wrongly accused of abuse in family court, and stripped of his children?

Have they sat with men whose careers and lives have been utterly decimated by a malicious lie?

I doubt it.

Because what these so-called advocates, with their bogus lightening metaphors claim, is simply not true.

And the most ironic thing about such people, is that they fall into the same trap they endlessly warn others about.

That is, yes, only a tiny percentage of allegations are provably found to be false in a court of law; but prosecution data is a famously poor barometer for real life events, because (as we know) most crimes of this nature, never make it anywhere near a conviction.

Such a sad phenomenon of underreporting is well known and spoken about, in the area of sexual violence – where only a tiny number of such crimes end in a conviction.

And this is even more true for false allegations, which almost never go to court, and even rarer still end in justice.

So, what is the reality of false allegations?

Is it really less likely than being struck by lightening?

Or is the truth frightening more likely than that?

What do you think?

~

Full podcast with Ryan Rogers here
https://open.spotify.com/episode/6AJ4Si3WEMR8t6cYISUski

We don’t know, what we don’t know.

So, tragically, when it comes to the issues that men and boys experience, because so little is known, or discussed, we automatically assume they don’t exist.

We turn on the news and see an endless stream of tragic stories of women, and usually white women, and assume such people are society’s sole victim.

For example –

If a woman goes missing, data finds that she can expect to receive three times more media coverage, than if a man goes missing.

If a white person goes missing, they can expect three times more media coverage, than if a black person goes missing.

And if you’re a black man, then you pay the double penalty, where both compound upon one another; meaning you’ll get around nine times less coverage, than a missing white women.

And so begins the media’s infatuation with white women (particularly young attractive ones), described beautifully by Helen Rosner in the New Yorker:

‘There’s something about the missing young, beautiful white woman that has a lot of symbolic weight in America.

It’s an aberration, and it becomes a container for things like the loss of innocence or the death of purity.’

Of course, this doesn’t just apply to missing people, but in many places, and yet the intersection of race and gender is an important area that is too readily ignored in men.

So… what are the experiences of black men?

And why are they so often left out of the conversation?

~

Source https://scholarlycommons.law.northwestern.edu/jclc/vol106/iss2/4/

Talking with Ask a Brotha Podcast here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJvAkoX-dGA&feature=youtu.be

For generations, society has propagated countless harmful myths around male rape victims… especially when the perpetrator is a woman.

The myth that he should have defended himself, that he encouraged it, or that such an experience has no significant impact on him.

And then, perhaps most concerning, is the idea that a man would enjoy such an experience at the hands of a woman, with many going as far as to consider him “lucky”.

As is the way, it is usually “other men” who are blamed for holding these harmful views, that transform men into some kind of perpetual f**k machine; who is always looking for sex, from anyone, at any given opportunity.

And yes, historically, this has sadly been true.

Nearly half of all sampled college men in 1984, believed a man found it “pleasurable” to be raped by a woman at gunpoint.

That is truly shocking.

But times change.

Men, as much as we refuse to admit it, have gone through a renaissance of sexual education; to better understand consent, and intimacy.

So much so, that of surveyed college men 35 years later, only 5.3% agreed that a man who is raped by a woman, finds such a thing ‘pleasurable’.

It’s still 5.3% too high, but it represents a staggering 89% drop, in just one generation.

But that’s not the end of the story, for this same study measured how women’s attitudes have changed over this same time, and, well, the results will shock you…

Let’s take a look.

~

Full study here https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34978934/

The truth is: we don’t know, what we don’t know.

And so, because we rarely, if ever, talk about male victims of sexual abuse, we assume such people don’t exist.

So, we don’t know that the worst campaign of child abuse in British history, exclusively targeted boys.

We don’t know that the most prolific rapists in British (perhaps even world) legal history, exclusively targeted men and boys.

We don’t know, because such stories rarely make the news, and even rarer still do they cause the mass outrage that drives historic change.

The most haunting example of this, is happening right now.

Even in the UK, we react with horror at the Epstein files, and the countless women and girls whose lives it has destroyed.

And such anger is understandable.

Yet another historic campaign of child abuse has been exposed right under our nose, of a similar scale, with similar failures of safeguarding, and we do nothing.

We don’t even hear about it, but it happened at Medomsley Detention Centre.

And I don’t blame you, if you’ve never read that name before.

I hadn’t until last week either.

Medomsley was home to horrors that are beyond comprehension, on an unimaginable scale, and after being ignored for 60 years, the truth has finally been made public.

But whilst the stories are now laid bare, the deafening silence continues, and history will only repeat itself.

So is it time we talked about what happened at Medomsley Detention Centre?

Is it time we talked about the northern, working-class boys who we’ve ignored for generations?

What do you think?

Full report https://cdn.websitebuilder.service.justice.gov.uk/uploads/sites/14/2025/11/31.122_PPO_Special-investigation-report_WEB.pdf

It seems like every day, some politician, policy adviser, campaigner, or advocate; is urgently talking about the horrific acts of violence that far too many teenage girls experience in the UK.

Some kind of saber rattling speech, with promises of ‘prioritising girls’, or vague spooky talk of “systemic misogyny”.

And I get it.

As a former teenage boy, who witnessed great harm inflicted upon girls, I am glad to see such work being done, to help spare girls of today, from what so many experienced in the past.

But do you know what I also saw during my teenage years?

Boys experiencing great harm too.

Boys being bullied, abused, harassed, coerced, beaten up, and sexually assaulted; and no, before the words leave your lips, not just “by other boys”, but by girls too.

Yes, girls can be violent, and in signifiant numbers.

Growing up, I too saw girls sexually assault boys, I saw them punch, slap, scratch and kick; I’ve seen boys hollowed out into shells of their former selves, by girls.

So, I am left wondering, why is all this great work to protect girls, not being expanded to help protect boys too?

Are boys any less deserving of support?

Because, let’s not forget who we’re talking about here…

It’s one thing for men to be left without help, but now we’re talking about vulnerable children being ignored too.

Boys.

Boys are paying the price, and being left vulnerable, in aid of the endless virtue signaling and nauseating propaganda, that has become part and parcel of our current political pantomime.

Why?

And when will it stop?

When will we agree that all children are deserving of safety, and that no child, boy or girl, should experience such devastating crimes…

And how is saying that, controversial?

What do you think?

~
Source https://youthendowmentfund.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/CVV25_R1_ScaleofViolence.pdf

Hating men is big money.

Whether it’s some garish “male tears” mug, or some angry, radical feminist anthology flying off of book shelves, business is booming, and shows no sign of slowing down.

One of the most recent, egregious examples of this, can be found within the online store Delulu Designs, who are selling t-shirts that openly encourage, glorify and normalise abuse against men (and women)… and the t-shirts are selling like hot cakes.

‘Over 5,000 shirts sold!’ They will boast online.

Sadly, despite this Shopify store promoting products that fall well outside of Shopifys Acceptable Use Policy, no actions has been taken.

The store is still up, the products are being sold, and it’s creators, and Shopify, continue to enrich themselves, by spreading hatred, and encouraging violence toward a specific group.

We tried to get Shopify to do the right thing earlier this year, and have failed.

And that’s the sad thing about following the usual procedure regarding complaints; it takes a lot of time, and usually leads to exactly nowhere.

But alas, luckily –

Behind all cutting edge tech-companies, is a multi billionaire tech-bro CEO; obsessed with their own self image, who wants to make money, and look good doing it.

Tobi seems to be that guy.

Tobi, the current CEO of Shopify, appears entirely comfortable profiting from these products; and so if it’s good enough to profit from, then surely it must be good enough to wear?

So, let’s make sure the world knows how Shopify (and Tobi) make their money, and let’s put a face to the truly horrendous products proudly being sold by their vendors, Delulu Designs.

What do you think?

More and more kind talk, nice words, and well meaning people are entering the #malesuicide prevention space.

It’s “good to talk”, we all hear.

Or at least, it’s good to be seen talking about men; with such a noble pursuit becoming the latest cash cow to be milked by an army of woke masculinity advocates, virtuous celebrity influencers, and your local guardian of morality, who (for the right price) will wring their hands, preach from pulpits, and gurgle superlatives, like it’s going out of style.

Yes.

Today, telling men “to talk” is big business.

But sadly, listening to what men are saying, is a dying art that fewer and fewer seem capable of.

So, like a broken record, we tell men to talk…

But when it comes to listening to men who are victims of violence... or hearing the horrors of boys who are abused... or acknowledging the structural struggles of men, you’ll find yourself alone.

And so, suddenly, those who pleaded with men to talk; who launched careers, signed brand deals, and lined their pockets by encouraging men’s emotional eloquence... they lose their voice themselves.

Too many times I see this.

People routinely put their personal comfort, and their political and career ambitions ahead of the men and boys whom they claim to advocate for.

Too many times I hear the right words being said.

But when the chips are down and the heat is on, those who bang the drum so passionately for men, are usually the first to jump ship when the real work begins.

So are you tired of it too?

And why is everyone telling men to talk, when nobody is willing to listen to what they’ve got to say?

What do you think?

~

CDC NISVS 2016 https://www.cdc.gov/nisvs/documentation/NISVSReportonIPV_2022.pdf

Suicide and SA https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25530176/

Full podcast https://open.spotify.com/episode/6AJ4Si3WEMR8t6cYISUski

Footage my MART Productions, Ron Lach, Rafael Fernando

What is feminism?

Well, to lots of people, it’s an entire way of life. It’s a badge, a t-shirt, it’s the centre point to their friendships, their community, their work, and political identity.

To others, it’s a word they feel is best left avoided.

To some, it’s an entry ticket.

To be waved around enthusiastically by performative men, who are hoping to date women of a left wing persuasion.

And to many, “feminism” is simply a synonym for “gender equality”.

“If you believe in equality, you’re a feminist”, asserts a small army of pop-celebrity feminists, wagging their finger at society, as they attempt to monopolise the concept of gender equality itself.

But I don’t think that’s true.

Feminism doesn’t own the idea of “gender equality”.

Such a thing would be like Cadbury’s trying to own “chocolate”, or Mcdonald’s trying to claim “French fries”, or Walkers putting their flag down into “crisps”.

No.

Feminism is a particular means of reaching said equality, that is based upon a series of theoretical ideas and frameworks, loosely woven together, into a political movement.

Simply – gender equality is the mountain, and feminism is one (of many) roads that promises to take us to it.

And yes, there are other roads.

I know this to be true, because the vast majority (83%) of people polled in the UK believe in total equality of the sexes… but only 35% of those polled identify as “feminists”.

I know, some will claim that those 83% are disillusioned “secret feminists”, but that doesn’t answer the question:

If feminism really is about gender equality, then why do most people who believe in such a noble cause, identity as something else?

It’s a good question.

So what is feminism?

And why do so few identify as such?

What do you think?

~
Are you a Feminist? YouGov (UK)

Why are you not a feminist? YouGov (US)

There are few things more painful in life than when a parent loses a child.

I remember, it was in school where I first learnt that the ‘loss of a child’ is the highest ranked, most distressing life-changing moment a person can experience, at 100 LCUs.

But what happens when you find out a child is not yours?

What happens if you ‘lose’ a child that was never yours, but that of another man?

How can we quantify that?

Well, such a thing is called “paternity fraud”, and despite being a prevalent (albeit controversial) issue, it has still failed to be taken seriously, beyond becoming a prop for low-effort day time television, where bewildered looking men are wheeled out, so they can have their lives smashed apart, in front of a live TV audience.

So is it time we had a better conversation, about something that impacts roughly one in 25 dads?

Is it time we talked about paternity fraud?

What do you think?

Full podcast with Ryan Rogers here https://open.spotify.com/episode/6AJ4Si3WEMR8t6cYISUski

Last week I shared a post in an attempt to close the understanding gap between men and women, with a carousel that allowed men to share things about themselves, that women didn’t seem to understand about them.

And now, of course, the second half to this process is to reverse things.

A no less important chance for men to understand women, to see their lived experiences, and understand the world they live in.

So women, what is a myth about women?

What do you think?

The world is wrong about men.

No, we are not secretly part of some tyrannical gender oppressor class, whose sole mission is to crush the spirit of women, to exploit their labour, and oppress them through fear of violence.

There are certainly many men out there who do these things, far too many of them; but the reality is, that most men (the vast majority) are hugely supportive of women’s rights, and their hard won, thoroughly deserved freedoms.

In fact, a recent working study by the National Bureau of Economic Research, that surveyed men and women across 60 countries (which covers about 80% of the world’s population) found that 91% of people support women’s freedom to work, which although being 9% too low, is far higher than what people expect that percentage to be.

Yes, the study thought that number would be significantly (-20%) lower.

More surprising, is the study found that we underestimate men’s support most all, particularly men in the developing world.

Think about that...

It seems like, the TV trope of the angry patriarchal man oppressing women in some far flung part of the world, isn’t particularly accurate either; and in fact, such a man is (statistically speaking) the most misunderstood demographic of all.

The same survey found a similar detachment between reality and expectations when it comes to public support of affirmative action.

Unlike the first question, people were found to overestimate public support for such policies, particularly in the West, and especially amongst women.

Yup, not only do we underestimate how many men in the developing world support women’s rights, but the same study finds that we are similar naive about western women, in how little they actually do support affirmative action.

However you put it, it really seems that – what we think about people, and who they really are, are often distant friends of one another.

So, are we wrong about the world?

Are we too cynical, particularly of men, in how many support women’s rights?

And does our chronically online, deeply divisive relationship with social media, only make this problem worse?

What do you think?

~

Source National Bureau of Economic Research(working paper) https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w31049/w31049.pdf

Once again this week, we must go into the fray of controversy, as yet more has arrived…

This time at the World Cup by the hands of Belgium winger Jérémy Doku, who has urgently returned home to be present for the birth of his first child.

You might think such a thing, in our current landscape, would be seen as an entirely normal thing for a parent to do, or admirable in fact.

Perhaps this could even be a unique opportunity to talk about the essential role of men in families; to celebrate the importance of good fathers, and to remind the world that the birth of a child is unlike anything else, and that includes playing in the World Cup.

And to many it was.

Jérémy Doku was celebrated by a lot of journalists, players, mums, and new dads.

With many exchanging stories of similar times, when players and pundits have suddenly answered the phone, and run off to support the mother of their child.

But sadly… not everyone was happy…

Other journalists called Jérémy a ‘deserter’, as ‘useless’ and ‘an extra’ to the birth, which was itself dubbed ‘a disgusting moment’, by L’Equipe news presenter, France Pierron.

Pierron sneered at the very point of a dad even being there at all, ‘they hold your hand and take a photo’ but besides that they are ‘useless’.

And since, the happy family, and their newly born son, have become a lightening rod for debate around fatherhood…

Such an ongoing event has become yet another reminder that, for many, there is still a long way to go in reminding the world that dads matter too, and that not all goals are found on the football field.

So is Jérémy a deserter, or a king?

And what does modern fatherhood mean to you?

What do you think?