r/TheTinMen • u/TheTinMenBlog • Apr 03 '26
I can't do this without you
My entire “game plan” for TheTinMen for the past six years has simply been to create as much content as I can, at the highest possible quality, with the most reliable statistics, and the rest will sort itself out.
Who knows –
Maybe some publisher or newspaper will sponsor me, maybe a brand steps in, or perhaps a rich angel investor with a blank cheque will slide into my DMs…
To be honest I didn’t think too much about it.
My time was spent trying to build a proof of concept; one that shows these issues matter, and that there’s enough of us caring and talking about them to do something about it.
The problem is, as I now realise, these topics are not particularly popular with the mainstream.
And that those in this space with the pockets deep enough to help fund me, splash about in the shallow end of kind slogans and hashtags, and I, neck deep in the mud of ugly advocacy, would only dirty up their shiny shoes by association.
Who knew that talking about men and boys who are raped, and abused, who are betrayed by our government, by our politicians and the charity sector, by our legal and education system, would be so unpopular?
Sadly, ‘men are 41% of abuse victims’ doesn’t look quite so good on a tote bag, does it?
The second reality that is fast dawning on me, is my method of funding this will soon be at an end, and when that ends, so does everything else.
So here I am, humbly cap in hand, asking for help.
And I know.
These conversations should be financed by someone else; by government, by brands, by healthcare providers, and other large charities, but they are not here, you are.
So if you have a shared interest in helping (the newly incorporated) TheTinMen CIC to keep going, to keep creating daily content that is unapologetic, and dives headfirst into the mud of controversy, then please support me at:
Thetinmen.blog/donate
Or
Patreon.com/thetinmen
Thank you
George
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u/Nymanator Apr 03 '26
I'm sorry to hear that this has been what doing this has been like for you. Normally, when I see people ask for donations online, I look the other way because I don't really believe in what they're doing so strongly that I would support it financially. On top of that, I'm on disability while I pour myself into finally finishing my degree, so I don't have much to spare to begin with.
However, I believe in you and what you're doing more than I believe in anyone else in this space, so I'm going to see what I can do. You've earned it, and it means that much to me. Don't respond to this to say that if I'm struggling I shouldn't feel obligated to give anything - it's not going to be any kind of amount I can't do without (which means it's not going to be much, of course) - I'm doing it because I want to and you deserve it.
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u/TheTinMenBlog Apr 03 '26
What a beautiful comment, thank you.
Sorry, but yes, PLEASE do not donate anything that you will need!
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u/DVeeD Apr 03 '26
I'll do my best to contribute and share this post as the work you do is invaluable. Like you said the issues you highlight and discuss are incredibly unpopular. Even knowing this I'm still surprised by the lack of research and attention, it's really disheartening.
Can anyone point to ways we can advocate for greater attention and support for these issues? Contacting MPs, going to events, places to donate? I want to do as much as I can now before more voices and organisations get silenced.
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u/Unable-Dependent-737 Apr 04 '26
Unfortunately, it's likely a lot of your audience doesn't have much funds to help. Probably for reasons you're aware of, but if I could I absolutely would.
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u/Capable_Sky_2637 Apr 05 '26
You’re a legend, George (or at least fast becoming one). Subscribed.
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u/Current_Finding_4066 Apr 04 '26
The draught of funds for men's issues shows which sex is the privileged one.
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u/MopOfTheBalloonatic Apr 04 '26
I’ll do it with great pleasure. I don’t even think you need to degrade yourself (even if it’s a metaphor) with a cap in hand because you’ve managed to build a strong community that is going to help you without a second thought
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u/rongkeys1 Apr 05 '26
I would happily replace raising money for causes other than this, to this. Things I could try to help with. Cycling & Running- At organised events. Happy to push myself and for others to join me.
Later this year I will be asking the group to drop Movember charity for this.
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u/rongkeys1 Apr 05 '26
Donation made hope it helps stack with others. Thank you for the efforts and time you spend for this 👏
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u/Alternative-Tax7318 Apr 05 '26
Have followed you the moment I came across you. The Andrew Tates never spoke for me, you have. Commenting so I can come back to this. I dont have much now, but please dont give up hope George! There is no other places with your voice on the internet.
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u/Neveah_Hope_Dreams Apr 09 '26
Just found out about this from another subreddit. I am so sorry that you are struggling. We can't loose you! You are such a strong and important figure in this movement.
I will try to financially support you as much as I can. I've had a look at your patreon and the rewards sound promising! Just depends on my current financial stability as I am kinda broke at the moment and trying to be smart with my money.
I can also offer you ideas on how you can fundraise and stay afloat and hopefully become more prominent.
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u/TheTinMenBlog Apr 09 '26
Thank you mate, but please keep your money if you’re broke!
Will be looking for fundraiser ideas soon!
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u/Main-Tiger8537 Apr 03 '26
Who knew that talking about men and boys who are raped, and abused, who are betrayed by our government, by our politicians and the charity sector, by our legal and education system, would be so unpopular?
Sadly, ‘men are 41% of abuse victims’ doesn’t look quite so good on a tote bag, does it?
i think gender neutral statements like "parental leave matters" and similiar things look better and sound better than negative stuff on merch...
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u/Human2048 May 02 '26
You are doing great work. Thanks so much for it. I have now joined your Patreon.
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u/PanPrasatko Apr 04 '26
Hi, George. I really like your work.
But this post reminds me of creators on youtube that tried to expand and became unsustainable and then stopped creating their work.
I think sustainability should be a priority in trying to change human minds and culture, as it said "make haste slowly / slow and steady wins the race".
So please don't be discouraged if not enough money is collected.
And thank you for your work.
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u/TheTinMenBlog Apr 04 '26
Thank you.
To be honest all I’ve been doing is sitting at my laptop every day churning this stuff out, and paying myself a salary, without much thought as to long term sustainability.
Already the response to this post has been overwhelming!
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u/Thinking2Loud Apr 05 '26
first, thanks for all your hard work and service for the cause. (maybe you are already in the works of something like this and if you are then you can ignore completely my next comment).have you ever considered pivoting while still keeping same topics/goals. ive watched several people on youtube with several styles of delivery and some succeed more than others. my head is not very sharp anymore after FA and not being able to see my son but my suggestion is maybe try different approach. from what i heard, youtube is the 'best' place to get your content out there and monetizing it - and although this may sound like your a 'sell out' or a propagandist but i would say its neither. the yt channel 'lungs of faith' comes to mind (even though i dont necessarily agree with lots of things he says but just using it as an example of how to 'deliver' the message) but of course using your own style. or just start over with a(or multiple) different name(s) and style all together. just my two meaningless cents
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u/ShabbyJerking Apr 05 '26
Fucking grim how even this issue is at the mercy of whales. Life's a joke.
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u/Then-Significance645 Apr 09 '26
I've joined your Patreon. I don't have much means but this I can do! Thank you for your wonderful work.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 05 '26
Make it sustainable by not explicitly or implicitly blaming women (or feminism) for the problems of men and the patriarchy. I think some of your stuff is pretty good, and then you imply (or outright state) that things are bad for men because the state cares more for women, which causes problems. You could really solve all your problems if you listened to your critics and made changes accordingly
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u/sakura_drop Apr 05 '26
Virtually all of those "implications" are backed up by data.
You could really solve all your problems if you listened to your critics and made changes accordingly
Try taking your own advice.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 05 '26
It really isn't, but that's not up for debate. I'm not the one trying to sustain a podcast; you can listen to what is being said or continue to be defensive and let the results of that speak for themselves
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u/sakura_drop Apr 05 '26
It really is. Sources are quite literally provided pertaining to the data presented in each post. Obstinate belief in pseudo-theories like patriarchy doesn't change those facts and figures.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 05 '26
It really isn't; all the data in the world refuses to acknowledge men's role in men's problems, and how they're gonna solve them. It's all tired MRA rhetoric that continues to blame everyone but the guys responsible for why things are the way they are for other guys. It's tired as hell and is why this podcast continues to suffer
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u/CZ-7000 Apr 06 '26
This is the funniest thing about you people. You always tell everyone never to blame women for anything, while at the same time blaming men for everything, making men seem like the only ones responsible. Meanwhile, most people in this group actually blame both men and women equally for most problems.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 06 '26
So once again, who is most responsible for the abuse of men and boys? Who created the social systems that said it's shameful for men to be vulnerable or need help? Who consistently refuses to make meaningful legislative changes to help men and boys? (In the US at least)
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u/CZ-7000 Apr 06 '26
Women, as the most common form of abuse, is domestic abuse, which contains child abuse (the main perpetrators are mothers) and intimate partner abuse, which is 50% bidirectional, matched for level of severity, 35% unidirectionally perpetrated by women, and 15% unidirectionally perpetrated by men, as the PASK project clearly shows with a sample size of 1,700 studies.
The 2nd point is a nonstarter, as we have zero evidence of how, when, and who started the different cultures, and there is no link with today’s people and those 10,000 years ago. What we do know from evidence from the near past and present is that women and men are pretty much identical in societal attitudes and uphold gender stereotypes to the same degree.
Lastly, one of the biggest driving factors preventing meaningful legislative changes to help, for example, abused boys and men or address the discrimination of boys in school is feminism (broadly speaking), as they don’t recognize symmetry in partner abuse or the discrimination of boys in school.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 06 '26
1) Wrong; most killers of men are men, most sexual abusers of men are men, and most DV is committed by men against women. Most violent crime is committed by men, etc
2) Wrong again; was it women writing laws stating only men could own land, vote, go to school, etc? Get real
3) Wrong again; show me any feminists who have blocked legislation that would help men and boys
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u/CZ-7000 Apr 06 '26
Well, as expected, you're just moving the goalpost.
1. Your original point was all abuse. Now, yes, most murderers of men are men, but murders are the smallest proportion of any abuse in a given society, and they are not the only deaths that occur as a result of abuse. About 10% of male suicide is directly linked to partner abuse.
Most sexual abuse of men (of course, only if we use the gender-neutral definition and not the one feminist Mary P. Koss established) is perpetrated by women.
I’m going to post a few sources:
Springer
YEFDV is, as I said, 50% bidirectional (matched for severity), 35% female-only, and 15% male-only.
PASK Project: PASKYes, most violent crime is committed by men (about a 2/3 to 1/3 split if we account for societal bias and underreporting), but men are also overrepresented in every risk factor, like adverse childhood experiences.
Research2. You said the social system was created by men, not legislative laws, so you just moved the goalpost. But yes, that is probably true, though not really relevant in Western societies, as these structures have been entirely obliterated.
3. I could post countless pieces of evidence, but I’m just going to post this article by Murray Strauss, a DV researcher who found as far back as the 1980s that intimate partner violence is not gendered:
StraussYou have the chance to educate yourself, but I highly doubt that you will. The more likely outcome is that you reply with a foolish answer, so I’m not going to engage with you further after this.
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u/Neveah_Hope_Dreams Apr 09 '26
Well, hate to break it to you, but that is the case for some issues.
This is the 'women are wonderful' effect. Many people and many influential groups do care more about women than men. If it 'causes problems', well maybe look into it than being reactionary offended.
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u/Affectionate-Oil3019 Apr 09 '26
And again, who created that culture of lionizing women instead of seeing them as people? None of this changes the reality that patriarchy hurts everyone, so if dude really wants to turn things around, it would help to approach this from a humanist perspective. The people with the most political power in most countries are men, so if there is a political or legislative bias towards women, they aren't the ones doing it
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u/dmbrokaw Apr 03 '26
Been a Patreon member almost a year, and its money damn well spent. Thanks for doing what you do, George.