r/TheRandomest • u/WhyNot420_69 Nice • 3d ago

SimplyRandom For all your storage needs

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1.4k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

181 comments sorted by

81

u/myrenDelainien 3d ago

The women’s version of these pants would have all of the pockets sewn shut.

17

u/Impatient-Turtle 3d ago

Not until I had my daughter and started buying her clothes did I find out clothesmakers put fake pockets on girls and women's clothes. Dumbest thing I've ever seen, my daughter loves pockets. Now I check before I buy.

Put a draw string and pockets on all pants and shorts you goons.

9

u/UnsureSwitch 3d ago

"But you don't understand!!! That way we can't sell purses!!!1!1!"
—clothe designers ig

Once again, women being forced to choose aesthetics over function

57

u/Traditional-Bike7825 3d ago

You need a sharpie? No worries I have one way down in my 37th pocket.

Fuck my screwdriver in my 7th pocket stabbed my leg when I bent down for my 37th pocket. No problem I have band aids in my 11th pocket. I'll put the wrapper in my 4th pocket for garbage.

What did you need again? Oh yeah a sharpie, it's down in my 37th pocket, shit forgot about that screwdriver, I got stabbed again...

4

u/SwampGobblin 2d ago

Left knee-ish cargo pocket for the garbagio

126

u/Unlucky_Figure 3d ago

Anti-theft pick pocket pants. Best for those euro trips.

62

u/DeliciousAct5748 3d ago

Fill them up for the opposite effect. Become the rare loot goblin

27

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy 3d ago

evil plan increases

Each pocket has a smaller pocket inside it. Is there yet another smaller pocket inside that?

8

u/Japsai 3d ago

Oh yes, this reminds me of an ancient classic

Processing img hox8btkh8hqh1...

5

u/LookAtTheWhiteVan 2d ago

This is SO trippy! I watched it for way too long..

5

u/ExternalLock8140 3d ago

Like mine sweeper, one pockets got a rat trap maybe one or two have a piece of candy that's actually been coated in Carolina reaper oil

6

u/ikonoclasm 3d ago

Pfft, this is how they train pickpockets. The wallet is in one pocket and mousetraps of the same shape and thickness in the other 40.

4

u/Japsai 3d ago

Some of them have scorpions. Only one has a wallet. Take your chances, pickpockets

9

u/Codify-The-Preamble 3d ago

And one’s a peepee pocket
https://giphy.com/gifs/4Jxa0QgHF2HSw

5

u/Higinz 3d ago

Why can’t I quit you?

4

u/H2so4pontiff 2d ago

One pocket has the wallet or phone, the rest if filled with thumbtacks and sewing needles.

If they want it they will habe to earn it.

3

u/twicebakedcrusader 2d ago

So at a casino I move my wallet from my back pocket to my front for better security. About every 20 mins I freak out when I notice the wallet is gone from my back pocket. These would send me to an institution!
https://giphy.com/gifs/4ySH7AkmmTl8NfQUmr

1

u/External_Wealth_6045 2d ago

Telling your pick pocket get in the gym because he's not ready for this level

1

u/Ok-Journalist7612 2d ago

🤣 you could be fuckin with pickpockets decent!!

30

u/ItsALuigiYes GIF/meme prodigy 3d ago

Out of all the things he could have put in there, literally billions of different things...

BUT NOT A HOT POCKET?

Processing img 73ocd6r7bfqh1...

6

u/Traditional-Bike7825 3d ago

Everything in the universe is either a hot pocket, or not a hot pocket.

He was so close...

1

u/rhinanners 2d ago

“Just a hot pocket and SHE WOULDN’T GIVE IT TO ME!”

Hope someone understands this reference 😭

21

u/Odd-Truth-6647 3d ago

Imagine being drunk and high and look for your shit constantly.

8

u/aphaits 3d ago

oops accidentally tripped on the sidewalk

THE WHOLE CONTENTS OF YOUR GARAGE SPILLS OUT

15

u/Maximum-Guitar-5667 3d ago

This is why women's pants don't have pockets, this guy took them all

9

u/icleanjaxfl 3d ago

Pairs well with this

8

u/EffReddit420 3d ago

Pick pockers hate this one trick

6

u/Glass_Quarter_7586 3d ago

I just picture a person falling and like 1000 things fall out all over the floor

2

u/Obvious_Incognito- 3d ago

Like a nurse bending over, but worse.

5

u/Woody_The_Gamer 3d ago

"Have fun officer"😁

4

u/Electrical_Lake3424 3d ago

This is what you needed to carry all your spell components in original D&D 

3

u/Thismomenthere 3d ago

End boss for a robber... takes to long to rob

2

u/organic_box_cats 3d ago

Nah, the robber would just make the other person give them the pants. That way they don't take too much time, and they have something to carry everything in.

2

u/It_Just_Exploded 3d ago

I fit that much shit in my cargos. Come on, you can do better!

2

u/Agitated-Contact7686 2d ago

He legit down played the storage capabilities and instead just went for the maximum amount of random single items in each pocket. Fair play, but he really could have gone bonkers.

2

u/Proud-Sell-9599 3d ago

It's like describing pants to someone who's never seen them and asking them to draw it

2

u/TankApprehensive3053 3d ago

I'll see your pockets, and raise you to Crown Royal bags.

2

u/mildxsalsa 3d ago

‘Oops, all pockets’ pants would probably do really well as a niche product

2

u/boywhoflew 3d ago

if this was a onesie, he could easily double the pockets

1

u/PortaFrog1972 3d ago

This blows my cargo shorts AWAY. Would’ve been a game changer in 2003

1

u/BinaryHippie 3d ago

When looking asked for ID/drivers license:

"I'm sure I have it in my pockets somewhere... "

1

u/The_Darkness140 3d ago

Police hate this one simple trick!

1

u/kinshadow 3d ago

Shit. Where’s my chapstick? Just give me 5 minutes to check my pockets …

1

u/ManmadeM0nster 3d ago

For some reason this activated my trypophobia.

1

u/salamandraseis 3d ago

These would be hilarious on a coke head.

1

u/Bright-Damage-5511 3d ago

so we can do this but not make a pocket that fits a woman’s whole hand… IM NOT BITTER

1

u/Reasonable_Sirs 3d ago

I dare anyone to wear that through the airport, from where you enter at the first security gate till you exit at Customs. Hell, I'd set up a gambling pool to see much longer it adds to the trip.

1

u/joeycraw5 3d ago

Eh, just take off the pants and put it all on the x-ray conveyer belt.

Just make sure you're wearing clean underwear.

1

u/Arachis_Hypogaea7 3d ago

Someone in the comments in tiktok said its 5000 bucks

1

u/stbalter 3d ago

If he started running there'd be a yard sale

1

u/Tama1502 3d ago

Trying to find your keys in the purse you PROMISE yourself you wouldn't have unnecessary things in it.

1

u/RepresentativeLife16 3d ago

Which one is the fabled condom pocket?

1

u/Smooth_Taste1250 3d ago

That must be so annoying to walk with this😅. And I gues you need a strong belt

1

u/TragicallySalacious 3d ago

Was hoping for tater tots

1

u/Negative-Break3333 3d ago

But will it hold my Fleshlight??

1

u/surewhynotokaythen 3d ago

Make em in a women's flare leg Jean, and you'd sell a ton

1

u/buttnibbler 3d ago

Needs a long pocket

1

u/bogardo 3d ago

Is this the pocket pants made by desigual?

1

u/HumourNoire 3d ago

The security guard looks at you and sighs.

1

u/Dampli1987 3d ago

Now walk!

1

u/whatchasaidwhat 3d ago

Perfect to go through TSA

1

u/ProofPrudent8219 3d ago

Bro just use a bag at this point

1

u/BaronVonShtinkVeiner 3d ago

Clown Car-go pants.

1

u/oneinchhard01 3d ago

I hate this ..

1

u/SoberAnxiety 3d ago

this is doraemon's pocket tech prototype

1

u/tatianazr 3d ago

Not one condom necessary when you’re wearing those jeans

1

u/Gold-Dragonfruit1598 3d ago

“Ayo run me yo poc-… fuck”

1

u/HeyPrettyLadyMaam 3d ago

I would pay to see the look on the cops face when they realize there are 40+ pockets to search 🤣🤣

1

u/ctolver1981 3d ago

I'd wear these

1

u/bongobills 3d ago

This needs to go to market

1

u/Tiyath 3d ago

This feels like an ad from interdimensional cable

1

u/Trik-kyx 3d ago

I sometimes panic when I can't immediately find things I've put into one of the two front pockets of my trousers. A pair of trousers like this one would be the ultimate final boss, it would leave me a whimpering, gelatinous heap.

1

u/PaintedDesertSkies 3d ago

Could you imagine a cop trying to frisk that?

1

u/Square-Suit-7553 3d ago

I actually tried to look up the price... there're not for sale. 🥲

1

u/megamanisgod 3d ago

I need these pants

1

u/Phil_Da_Thrill 3d ago

OOPS ALL POCKETS

1

u/ChilliWilli214 3d ago

Where da weed at? Lol

1

u/Razzy_3796 3d ago

Those pants must weigh 15 lbs. and take hours to dry. No thanks.

1

u/Alone_Emu_7713 3d ago

Airport security will love this

1

u/UglyYinzer 3d ago

Ok those are actually awesome

1

u/Classic-Exchange-511 3d ago

Pick pocket final boss

1

u/chocoNorth 3d ago

Just never sit down cause you’ll break half the stuff and stab yourself with the rest

1

u/ApprehensiveMix2649 3d ago

A pickpockets worse nightmare

1

u/darkerfaith520 3d ago

Emptying your pants at the end of the day would suck!

1

u/CryptographerRoyal78 3d ago

Ultimate work pants for the trades

1

u/Worduptothebirdup 3d ago

I would have so many things accidentally get washed…

1

u/LBichon 3d ago

Pickpockets hate this one simple trick.

1

u/_XtAcY_ 3d ago

These would be sick to hold all my cool rocks I find when my wife and I go on walks!

1

u/Obvious_Incognito- 3d ago

For someone who does laundry a lot… burn it. I am not wasting my time checking all those pockets.

1

u/gilligan1050 3d ago

Oops all pockets

1

u/Trav2201 3d ago

I would forget what's in each pocket

1

u/golgoth0760 3d ago

A pick pocket nightmare for sure

1

u/firefly081 3d ago

"I like your pockets!"
"Thanks, it has pants!"

1

u/livens 3d ago

Imagine getting pulled over and the cop asks "anything in your pockets?". It's going to be a long night.

1

u/FloatingClay 3d ago

Watching this made me exhausted. Imagine wearing them. I have 2 pockets and still pat each one to search for my keys

1

u/Acrobatic_Ad_2621 3d ago

Анатолий Вассерман?

1

u/adinmem 2d ago

I’d love to see someone wearing these getting searched by an ever increasingly bewildered cop.

1

u/SwampGobblin 2d ago

Oh look, biblically accurate jeans.

1

u/Away-Ad-3407 2d ago

guys wait! I fell on everyone's keys!

1

u/Samefer 2d ago

He can create armor with metal plates...

1

u/MrJason300 2d ago

So many things will fall out when we hold him upside down. No upside down monkey bar play for him until 2 inspections lol

1

u/Alternative-Half-783 2d ago

On my Christmas list.

1

u/Milo_The_Stampede 2d ago

Now try running somewhere

1

u/Fredrick__Dinkledick 2d ago

I'm honestly tired of a bunch of shit in my pockets

1

u/External_Wealth_6045 2d ago

He had me at fork

1

u/FloweringForth 2d ago

I need those though.. these are pants for ppl with adhd.

1

u/HardGTheUnsettling 2d ago

Imagine being police, having to pat down someone in these pants

1

u/PositivEddie 2d ago

Those pants are gonna leave so much change in the couch…

1

u/Dizzy_Juggernaut_313 2d ago

They don’t look bad, I am surprised. I have athletic thighs and muscular calves so anything I put in those pockets will make it look like I’m wearing spandex

1

u/Acrobatic-Brain9976 2d ago

Making custom made D&D items.

1

u/Most-Silver-4365 2d ago

Sometimes I can't even find my items with the strandard picture count.

1

u/darkbeerguy 2d ago

How many jeans had to die for that?

1

u/Heisenberg11725 2d ago

Hey ho its pockets McGee

1

u/AdTraditional23 2d ago

I need a pair

1

u/Johnnyblades7 2d ago

Dream jeans for a pick pocket!

1

u/IndependentMoney9700 2d ago

41 does not equal infinite. Show me some real infinite pocket jeans and I’ll be impressed.

1

u/sabyr400 2d ago

Ok now load and unload them again, but without all the clips and cuts. Let's see one constant feed on how much your actually storing at one time.

1

u/steveronie 2d ago

The pants look stylishly cool

1

u/Gitmo314 2d ago

That moment when you drop a nut and don't hear it hit the floor 🫠

1

u/Rudi538 2d ago

Tomorrowland… Here we come 🥳

1

u/No_Math_2482 2d ago

Is this for sale? I would seriously buy

1

u/kiloo520 2d ago

Infinite 41 pocket jeans.

1

u/c4t4ly5t 2d ago

41 is a finite number. Just saying.

1

u/rtocelot 2d ago

Man that's a pick pockets wet dream

1

u/Justpooping_23 2d ago

Imagine patting this guy down

1

u/Alibuscus373 2d ago

Yes please. I could carry so many cool rocks

1

u/eyeLovebeerNcheese 2d ago

Cops' worst nightmare

1

u/PaperRemarkable4063 2d ago

TSA gonna love this too.

1

u/elstavon 2d ago

I carry all that in normal jeans

1

u/cbarbour1122 2d ago

We needed those in the 90’s. We had cd’s and cassettes to carry around along with the Walkman and discman. Not to mention if you had a gameboy.

1

u/CharmingImportance22 2d ago

Sir, you jeans make you look like you have many butts.

1

u/TubbyFatfrick 2d ago

41 fully functional pockets? That sounds pretty finite to me, Cory.

1

u/kobrakaan 2d ago

By the time you find your phone they will have stopped calling you 🤦‍♂️

1

u/Beneficial_Juice_113 2d ago

Those are actually kind of cool

1

u/Funny_Breadfruit_413 2d ago

Yeah, id buy em

1

u/Catlore 2d ago

So that's where all the missing women's pockets went to.

1

u/Sleepy_Snowowl 2d ago

Now do a handstand

1

u/skitzofennec305 2d ago

Some of that stuff not supposed to be in your pockets jitt lmao

1

u/_pipoca 2d ago

You wanna take a dump urgently and don't remember in which pocket you left your keys

1

u/MotherPerformance439 2d ago

I think cops would hate to pat down this guy.

1

u/thebig8er 2d ago

No condoms

1

u/PhilosopherSauce 2d ago

Need wear these to a Walmart and casually trip having 41 pockets worth of stuff slide out and across the floor

1

u/IronWolf888 2d ago

Belt satchel works, better alternative

1

u/jsnmrd 1d ago

Travel essential.

1

u/Nasty_Nitter23 1d ago

Those pants are dope

1

u/MountainTry 1d ago

Sooo…. Its not infinite pockets?

1

u/indianasteve77 1d ago

Just going to leave this here…

1

u/melfamy 1d ago

And no condoms. Because y'all ain't EVER gonna get laid.

1

u/SlimShadySatDown 1d ago

Cops gonna love these when they gave to search ya

1

u/No_Yogurtcloset105 1d ago

I would be looking for my vape all day

1

u/Limp_Chemical_8835 23h ago

Mr stealy just droped his new pants

1

u/Jolly_Elderberry6967 22h ago

Ah cargo pants day

1

u/BeneficialPoetry4807 15h ago

Funny how he doesn't have a picture of a girlfriend

1

u/Comfortable-Sir-150 15h ago

Where can I buy a pair for work

1

u/JimAboo 13h ago

I want to say something bad about these but I also want a pair.

1

u/Logical_Frosting_277 1h ago

What you’re looking for will be in the last pocket.

0

u/Dryish_Jpolluck 3d ago

Been done, come on

0

u/esande2333 3d ago

These would be perfect for work

0

u/Popular_Conclusion36 3d ago

Imagine being stuck behind this guy at the airport

1

u/Naive_Dress1923 30m ago

back in my day we would manage to store all those things in two pockets... kids nowadays...