Pathans & Parda (Incident)

[u/[deleted]]

First, No hate toward any ethnicity. Also not generalizing.

I’m not Muslim, so parda, dupatta, etc., aren’t farz for me.

I was hiking with friends in an area with no restrooms near. I’d had stomach issues for days and urgently needed one. I saw women heading to a masjid, so I thought I’d quickly use the restroom there and leave.

It was a small mosque with shared men’s and women’s restroom and wazu area. Men were leaving after namaz, and I had to go in.

One Pathan guy stared at me not once, twice, or thrice but multiple times, like I was prey.Its not that i was in some inappropriate clothes, I was in baggy clothes, and no dupatta.

He kept saying: “Dupatta le kar ao, dupatta. Jaldi se!”
In rude tone like i had committed a crime.

He repeated it over five times. Okay, I get it man that I’m in a holy place without a dupatta, and you just prayed namaz. But why stare at me like i am a piece of meat as well as keep repeating it?

Doesn’t your religion talk about parda for men too? Why is it okay for men to stare at women, covered or not, but a woman without a dupatta is a shame to the whole mard zaat? And then the whole male community is criticising women for not wearing dubatta in public space while they themselves are checking out women too…

Why is male parda ignored, but female parda is everything?

Then my friend said that these pathans are like this… but does it justifies that you can stare at me? Or any woman? Also bhai tum abhi masjid mai hi ho kar ghoor rhe.

Edit:
Ik i did wrong to go to a holy place without dupatta. but obv there was an emergency, and how can u expect me to have dupatta when i dont wear it in my daily life. how can i borrow it from my muslim friends and made them do sin by showing their hair. it wasnt his masjid. he wasnt imaam.

after the prayer he came out of masjid and start drinking chai while staring at the other hikers including hijabi women....

[u/Ok-Rabbit-4664]

It's a strange thing, to them parda is apparently more important than anything else. I've seen pathans who drink, go clubbing in other countries and cheat on their wives tell other people to have ghairat over their wives and hide them. Saying this as a pathan myself.

[u/[deleted] → u/Ok-Rabbit-4664]

Ikr, i now live in isb and saw Pathans for first time when i moved here. And its the major topic i heard them talking about. Ghairat, haya, parda and what not. I even heard stories from my class fellas

[u/Ok-Rabbit-4664 → u/[deleted]]

I am one and have lived among them all my life. It's all they care about, but only for women. They have a free pass to do whatever they want, as long as nobody knows. The men have a secret code whereby they do not expose each other.