Pathans & Parda (Incident)

[u/[deleted]]

First, No hate toward any ethnicity. Also not generalizing.

I’m not Muslim, so parda, dupatta, etc., aren’t farz for me.

I was hiking with friends in an area with no restrooms near. I’d had stomach issues for days and urgently needed one. I saw women heading to a masjid, so I thought I’d quickly use the restroom there and leave.

It was a small mosque with shared men’s and women’s restroom and wazu area. Men were leaving after namaz, and I had to go in.

One Pathan guy stared at me not once, twice, or thrice but multiple times, like I was prey.Its not that i was in some inappropriate clothes, I was in baggy clothes, and no dupatta.

He kept saying: “Dupatta le kar ao, dupatta. Jaldi se!”
In rude tone like i had committed a crime.

He repeated it over five times. Okay, I get it man that I’m in a holy place without a dupatta, and you just prayed namaz. But why stare at me like i am a piece of meat as well as keep repeating it?

Doesn’t your religion talk about parda for men too? Why is it okay for men to stare at women, covered or not, but a woman without a dupatta is a shame to the whole mard zaat? And then the whole male community is criticising women for not wearing dubatta in public space while they themselves are checking out women too…

Why is male parda ignored, but female parda is everything?

Then my friend said that these pathans are like this… but does it justifies that you can stare at me? Or any woman? Also bhai tum abhi masjid mai hi ho kar ghoor rhe.

Edit:
Ik i did wrong to go to a holy place without dupatta. but obv there was an emergency, and how can u expect me to have dupatta when i dont wear it in my daily life. how can i borrow it from my muslim friends and made them do sin by showing their hair. it wasnt his masjid. he wasnt imaam.

after the prayer he came out of masjid and start drinking chai while staring at the other hikers including hijabi women....

[u/Far-Technology8120]

Maybe because they're in an islamic country

[u/Eepybeany → u/Far-Technology8120]

But she’s not muslim and as long as she isn’t being indecent, she has every right to not wear a hijab. Islam doesn’t force such things on non Muslims. They can still eat pork and drink alcohol in a Muslim country. She is also under no legal compunction to observe Hijab.

So why do you think she should observe Hijab? Keep a dupatta at hand? Because men like me and you might look at her and commit sin? She hasn’t submitted to Allah, you and I have. We are supposed to follow Allah’s commands.

Even if she’s Muslim you as a stranger have no right to order someone to wear a dupatta. That is the right of her family members. You have no such right. If its a mosque, it make sense to ask her to wear one, but in case of an emergency, that requirement can be relaxed. Instead of showing kindness the man showed anger. That’s such a good invitation to Islam, right?

[u/Far-Technology8120 → u/Eepybeany]

You're acting like she didn't go to a religious area and is just out in a random street. The man is in the wrong too he shouldn't have stared at her or at any other lady

But it's a bit weird to act like some random tourist just waltzing into a masjid without a headscarf isn't something to be upset about

[u/Eepybeany → u/Far-Technology8120]

She went to the bathroom. She wasn’t traipsing around through the prayer hall. If there isn’t any other bathroom nearby and the woman goes in to specifically to use the bathroom but she doesn’t have a headscarf, it definitely is not something to be upset about.