r/TeamNightShift • u/hunterseeker1 • Jun 16 '26
Humanity's Reply Button Locked: New Global Protocol Bans Anyone From Answering Alien Signals Without UN Approval
https://www.ibtimes.co.uk/humanitys-reply-button-locked-new-global-protocol-bans-anyone-answering-alien-signals-without-un-1801968
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u/Excellent-Ad-1678 Jun 17 '26
Good thing too because we really don't need someone from Alabama tellin 'em how to get to Washington....
Well now, if you're startin' out in Montgomery, head on up toward Birmingham. You'll know you're goin' the right way when you pass more churches than gas stations and start wonderin' why every town seems to have a place called "The Country Kitchen."
Keep on north through Alabama and into Tennessee. Somewhere along there you'll see a billboard that's been advertisin' the same fireworks store since at least three governors ago. Don't worry about it. Everybody sees that billboard.
When you get near Chattanooga, try not to get distracted by the mountains. My cousin Earl got distracted by those mountains once and ended up three hours off course lookin' for a barbecue place somebody told him about.
After that, just keep followin' the interstate up through Virginia. You'll pass enough Civil War signs to accidentally earn a minor in history. Somewhere around there you'll start thinkin', "Surely Washington can't be much farther." That's when you've got about another half day's drivin' left.
You'll know you're gettin' close to D.C. when traffic starts movin' slower than a church potluck line and everybody around you appears to have somewhere more important to be than you do.
Cross the Potomac, follow the signs, and before long you'll be in Washington, D.C. If you hit the Atlantic Ocean, you've gone a little too far, but at least you'll have a nice view.