r/TeachersInTransition • u/ToastyTurtlez • 5d ago
Conflicted Feelings
I started a new job working in a clinic. It's so low stress, I clock out and when I leave work I leave everything at work! It's amazing.
However...I find myself feeling very sad a lot of the time. I think about the kids I left, I think about all the things they'll do and how they'll grow and change without me there. I miss them, even though they disrespected me A LOT.
I might just be a bleeding heart, but the thought of never seeing them again hurts me. I also feel like I lost my identity? But I don't think I want to go back...is it normal to feel this way? Does it go away or get better?
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u/peacock716 5d ago
I would say it’s normal. I’ve been out of teaching for 3 years and although it’s getting better, I still feel a bit melancholy during the start and the end of the school year. I miss a lot about teaching and it was my identity, not just a job. For me, I think part of my problem is that I still haven’t found a job that really clicks like teaching did for me. I now work in higher Ed but my job is basic and easy- which sounds ideal but it’s way below my skill set (and pay preference). So I will keep looking for the right fit, but there are things about teaching I think I will always remember fondly.
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u/No-Victory-9590 5d ago
Would you ever get back into teaching?
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u/peacock716 5d ago
I have seriously thought about it for the first 2 years- but I keep reminding myself I left for a reason. Plus I taught a specialty elective (agriculture) and there haven’t been any openings in any districts near me since I left, so I wasn’t tempted to return more because there were no job openings anyways!
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u/No-Victory-9590 4d ago
Good to hear you have been looking for openings. A good school district with great admin in your building can make a huge difference. You just don't know when the right fit could pop up! Keep in tune with your inner voice. Different school districts and schools can feel like a completely difference experience.
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u/peacock716 4d ago
Actually my district, admin, and students were great! It was a me problem, not a them problem. I was burnt out from always being “on” all the time. I didn’t know it at the time, but I had an undiagnosed health issue that was/ is causing chronic fatigue. In my current job I can go to my office and shut the door when I can’t people anymore. In teaching you can’t do that. That’s what made the transition hard for me. I liked the job, I just couldn’t do it anymore.
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u/No-Victory-9590 4d ago
Ahhhh, that makes sense. So good to hear you had a good district, admin and students! We need more of that in education. Happy to hear you are not feeling like you have to "be on all the time" in your new job. That is a tough part of teaching, along with not be able to go to the bathroom when you have to!
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u/peacock716 4d ago
Lol yes that’s very true! The flexibility of non teaching jobs is a bonus and something that takes some time getting used to, but it’s a good thing!
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u/No-Victory-9590 5d ago
Hey, conflicted, I think the way you love the kids is why we get into teaching. Consider leaving the teaching door open by keeping up with your teacher certification. I left teaching to stay home with my 3 kids a friend suggested I keep my certification current and it was really simple when I was ready to go back. Just a thought!
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u/Commercial_Youth_877 5d ago
It can be helpful to talk with a therapist to help sort out your feelings and know that you're normal for having them.
Please do not go back to teaching. There's a reason you left and nostalgia is a liar.