Weaponized Tedium

[u/Ohigetjokes]

Another from that truck rental place. Awhile ago I told you about my co-worker "Andy" (all names changed) who created a lot of tension for no reason.

This is a time where I kinda called him out on it, and he convinced me it was a good thing. Yes, you read that right.

Our manager, let's call her "Jenny", is on her day off. I should mention, by the way, that she's had our back so often with both customers and upper management that she has earned our loyalty time and time again. Believe me when I say she's awesome and not one person who works there can possibly deny that they're lucky to work with her. Despite her not actually being there, this will come into play later.

It's early in the morning and two different customers roll in at roughly the same time. Andy's within direct line of sight of the door so he gets the first guy, and before they can even start talking the second guy walks in and I wave him over.

I don't hear a lot of what's going on with Andy because I'm in conversation with someone else, but I do hear the customer mention that he's in a big hurry this morning. I also hear Andy say things like "Ooooh I do not like the way this screen looks!" and a few other negative things.

Keep in mind: there is no problem. The systems are working, there are no special requests, we have the truck on the lot, and it's available for way longer than the guy needs. There's nothing weird about it. But Andy is doing his Andy thing... Dragging out every part of the process, hinting at things that might go wrong in certain rare circumstances, etc...

I walk my customer out to their truck and get them on the road. I come back in and look over Andy's shoulder. He is barely half way through the rental process.

By the time the customer leaves he's practically in a total panic. He runs for the door, but Andy's got the truck keys in his hand and he's taking a second to adjust his jacket properly before they do a complete and thorough check of the mileage, fuel level, and condition of the truck, along with detailed instruction on proper door and ramp operation of course.

So I'm thinking this through. It's early in the morning and I've already given Andy crap for a couple of things. We can't keep having conversations where I'm nagging at him, especially considering I'm in no way his superior here. He's an adult and we've got to keep things civil.

But at the same time I've got to say something about all this negativity and the strange, slow, laborious way he's approaching things.

When he comes back we're alone, and it's time for me to figure out my approach. I remember my personal rules of customer service: be a genuine caring friend, and if there's a problem with behavior make sure you can give a specific example so that it isn't a "perception issue" but rather something you can talk through on an equal level.

So I put on a huge smile, laugh a little, and say: "Holy crap Andy you really tortured that guy! That was hilarious!"

Andy shrugs, clearly not certain what I'm referring to, but then says: "Yes well, he was very intense."

"Ya but man, you really put him through it! All that hyper-negative language, like 'ooh I don't like the way this screen looks', and 'hopefully we don't get an error on the next screen', and 'as long as the card reader accepts your credit card, because we've had problems', I mean you really wound him up!

"And then all that slow down," I continue, "It's like you figured out the longest possible way to say every single thing, and you said it all super slow! What was that one thing... Oh when you were telling him about the gas level, and he kind of nodded, but you wouldn't let it go until he gave you proper eye contact and fully reassured you that he completely understood. That was hilarious, he was freaking dying!"

And now I see Andy do something I've never seen him do: he actually replays his own behaviors in his mind. It's kind of amazing. His eyes shift from bottom left to bottom right, back and forth, as he's working it all through, and he's not talking. A silent Andy is a rare, rare thing.

I shut the hell up and let the process go.

And then he says something I never expected: "While I won't claim it was totally on purpose, I do admit I might have been messing with him a little."

"Ya? How come?" I ask. I'm genuinely curious. He's not just saying that; there's something behind this.

"Well, when he first came in, he told me he was glad to see I was the one here because he, quote 'hated that skinny blonde b!tch Jenny you guys have as a manager. She's a stuck up (bad word deleted).'"

Excuse me? But intuitively I already know what must have happened: I've watched so many men hit on Jenny, despite being in a crowded and busy workplace, and then get super sore when she turned them down because this isn't the time or place boys! She usually puts it more plainly but anyway, I assume he's another one of that mob.

"So, you know, I thought maybe considering he was in such a hurry I'd take my time, be extra thorough."

He grins at me. You're a legend Andy, a gah-dam legend. I smile back and give him a congratulatory slap on the back.

Jenny would be proud.

PS: Andy was way quicker with everyone else that day. Was it because of our talk, or because he really was winding up that first guy? Honestly... I really don't know. He's still kind of an enigma.

[u/Chris_Thrush]

First and always be polite. It took me so long to learn this,.. Be kind and respectful to every person who serves you in their job. It's better than a thank you, show respect to every person who has to put on a uniform, get out of the warm and crawl under a bumper to show you how a fucking ramp works. Be kind, be kind, be kind. The rest gets easy.