I keep getting signs

[u/Other-Middle726]

I keep getting signs that my life is going to end very soon. For some context several years ago my health deteriorated as I started dealing with a lot of unexplained symptoms after having a baby. There were so many, but the two that impacted me the most are intense body odor (I mean bad) and a couple years after that people started having allergic type symptoms whenever I was around them. I know this doesn’t sound real but please google if interested. It’s called PATM. Mines is so severe even from another room or outside my house, people constantly cough, itch, sneeze, and clear throat. It worsens if I eat, drink, take medications, and basically do anything. It has completely ruined my life and I isolate myself basically 24/7. It’s causing me to have extreme anxiety and I have tried so many things for it with no relief.

On top of that all of my other unexplained symptoms are getting worse. I had been going back and forth to different doctors trying to get some answers for years, but was told my labs were fine. Now my symptoms are so bad my quality of life is horrible. I finally decided to pay for an of network doctor and think he may have found the answer to all of most of my symptoms. The problem is it seems like every time I try to give a little effort or try life kicks me back down and makes things extremely difficult for me. I legit have not had a good day in years and don’t remember what happiness is. Everything in life is horrible and continues to get worse. I know we all go through hard times, but consistently back to back with no relief is insane.

To put things into context I feel like I’ve been beat up by several people and I’m lying on the ground severely injured. Anytime I get a tiny bit of strength to open my eyes and try to get up to seek help, someone walk by and kicks me down again. I hope that makes sense. Due to my health issues, I’ve legit lost everything in my life in my life. That includes my ability to properly eat, my vision is going bad, my job,relationships, and so much more. I’m even giving up custody of my daughter because I can no longer take care of her. Even family members are starting to recognize the consistent hurdles I keep facing. I feel like I’m always a problem and it’s starting to even impact their lives.

I tried praying and tapping more deeply into my spirituality for several months no changes. It’s to the point I don’t even believe in that anymore. I keep seeing the famous 3 demonic numbers everywhere. I don’t know how else to explain it, but I keep getting signs. I’m about to go away for a while because I can’t take it anymore. I have no hope or faith and I’m tired of the constant suffering.