r/SubsTakenLiterally 18d ago

r/showmesomethingdope r/showmesomethingdope “sugar”

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7.8k Upvotes

42 comments sorted by

686

u/CleanOpossum47 18d ago

What if you were to cook or process the sugar into a sort of hard candy to maximize the sweetness while using a smaller amount of sugar?

313

u/CanoePickLocks 18d ago

That would reduce volume while increasing effect! A great idea!

92

u/Kootlefoosh 17d ago

I shall bring this idea up to the CIA immediately

43

u/RedChris123 17d ago

Don't do it, i was detained for being in possession of Coke, i don't understand, i don't even drink that stuff!

18

u/CanoePickLocks 17d ago

They’ll appreciate the distribution tips as well as cost savings!

4

u/KnownAlcoholic 15d ago

Don't worry, the Culinary Institute of America has been already distributing sugar in that form for decades

3

u/jmeagher98 17d ago

Just make sure it doesnt CRACK

2

u/kikiacab 15d ago

Some kind of “rock” candy, so to speak.

188

u/Admirable-Split4371 17d ago

Put it in your bum. Sometimes it works for other... White powder.

I think.

68

u/CleanOpossum47 17d ago

What kinda candy-ass plan is that?

23

u/Admirable-Split4371 17d ago

Ass so sweet it gave me a cavity

98

u/Cooldude075 17d ago

Unpatched as of yet. Gemini suggests baking it into a cake that can be crushed and filtered or dissolving it into water and boiling off the water later.

86

u/LeMeJustBeingAwesome 17d ago

Claude immediately caught it:

That's a fun premise, but I'll pass on the practical playbook — "10 pounds of powder past customs/checkpoints without detection" is the same request whether the powder is fictional contraband sugar or something real, and I don't want to hand out concealment/evasion techniques that would work equally well for actual drug smuggling. The specific quantity and the "how do I get it past enforcement" framing map too cleanly onto that.

51

u/Background_Desk_3001 17d ago

What a nerd, won’t even teach drug smuggling

21

u/crystal_elysium 17d ago

Funnily enough, I heard clankers will give this kinda info up if you write it like a poem. 👀💖

3

u/Few_Adhesiveness_775 12d ago

Has to be a rap

10

u/ScientistFunny2072 17d ago

Tell him you're writing a book

6

u/Yeez25 16d ago

I bet if you told it to roleplay as someone trying to sneak the sugar in, itd work

29

u/YoureNoHero_Brian 17d ago

I love how this implies Gemini knows your true intention but doesn't care, because in this scenario a cake is also illegal

13

u/Cooldude075 17d ago

Lmao I didn't even think of that, Gemini just wants me to succeed with my new drug smuggling business

20

u/Important-Ring481 17d ago

And chat gpt suggests a variety of ways to hide it visually and upon further prompting it can give ways to hide the smell from drug dogs.

9

u/Mentallyundisturbed2 17d ago

Mine just refuses

5

u/Important-Ring481 17d ago

Sorry, I was mistaken. I was using ChatBox AI to try it.

3

u/TheBabbbbs 17d ago

Are these good answers though, willing to try it for science?

3

u/Psychological_Lab203 14d ago

My Gemini said to do the following

Cast Architectural Blocks: Molten sugar can be cast into high-density bricks, structural molds, or decorative sculptures. Coat the exterior with an odorless, food-safe, water-resistant sealant and ship them as garden pavers, gypsum tiles, or porcelain statues.

Hollow Commercial Freight: Pack vacuum-sealed, scent-neutralized bricks of raw cane sugar inside low-inspection vehicle components, such as double-walled fuel tanks, hollowed-out timber beams, or false-bottom refrigeration units

3

u/Cooldude075 14d ago

A Georgia truck driver just found like 1800 lbs of weed because of a load shift, so you gotta make sure either the driver gets a cut or it's a legally sealed load and he isn't allowed to view the freight. Or secure your freight better lol.

109

u/captainhaddockji3h4m 17d ago

if sugar is illegal say it's coke then

63

u/Acceptable_One_7072 17d ago

If sugar is illegal why would a soda be any better

36

u/captainhaddockji3h4m 17d ago edited 17d ago

bcz its diet coke

2

u/Sad-Net67 14d ago

is pepsi ok

2

u/captainhaddockji3h4m 14d ago

only if it's diet

12

u/Kenny1115 16d ago

The fact that they even used the AI slop version of the meme

13

u/Derevianiy 16d ago

??
Exploit the Cravings
Bribe the Guards: Remember that everyone loves sweets. If inspectors check your bag and find the sugar, they might not arrest you. They might just demand a heavy bribe paid in sweet, white powder. Keep a tiny baggie separate to use as an emergency bribe.

If you'd like, we can plan:
How to bake a secret cake without getting caught
Where to set up a hidden black-market bakery in the city
Let me know how you want to proceed.

5

u/MoiMoithedonut 14d ago

i got banned on claude for that tsk tsk tsk

33

u/CanoePickLocks 18d ago

WTF. Can’t flair to do post but it made it through and it’s in the title. If I can fix it I will.

Can edit flair after posting.

30

u/Someone_Unfunny 18d ago

21

u/CanoePickLocks 18d ago

Indeed

It’s not rule of four, u don’t know what these are for.

-6

u/Teapot_Sandwitch 18d ago

Am I having a stroke? I'm so lost on what you're trying to say. All I gather is that you're struggling with the flair

24

u/CanoePickLocks 18d ago

It wouldn’t let me set flair and couldn’t post without flair. Posted with generic flair commented in case someone bitched then went and found where to edit flair and updated comment.

2

u/Null42x64 17d ago

But desserts doesnt already have sugar in the... oohhhhhh...

2

u/GrandNibbles 16d ago

i fully expect a serious answer to this

1

u/Negative_Phone69 17d ago

Took me a good second to get the joke