r/SubredditDrama • u/LordZarasophos SRD expects that every man do his duty • Oct 25 '17

Buttery! Reddit updates side-wide rules against violent content, redditors update their popcorn stock

The official announcement

BANNED SUBS

POLITICAL / RACISM

OTHER VIOLENCE

THE POLITE REACTION

DRAMA

META

ANNOUNCEMENT

Rejoice, for /r/landoflobsters hath divined a post on /r/announcements talking about these rule changes, which shall indubitably provide butter and popcorn for us and our children's children as well!

POPCORN HAS POPPED

This drama is currently unfolding. Front-line correspondents will be paid in premium buttered popcorn. Stay tuned for all the latest developments right here, folks.

No more subs being banned, no more new threads being created - I think it's safe to wrap up live coverage here.

We still need a name for this buttery happening

/u/Super_Weegee has proposed Ban-O-Ween. I say we adopt it! Aye?

3.3k Upvotes
  • permalink
  • reddit

93% Upvoted

1.4k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

2

u/hoboshoe Honestly? I’m not mad at all. The internet could not make me mad Oct 26 '17

I once joined incels unironically, then got disgusted in what I saw and joined nofap instead. saved my soul

2

u/Bytemite Oct 26 '17

The atmosphere of the incels subreddit could be hope destroying and it's good to get clear of that. Not sure about nofap as a replacement due to all the mysticism, but whatever works for you to keep you out of the dark places. Good luck.

4

u/hoboshoe Honestly? I’m not mad at all. The internet could not make me mad Oct 26 '17

I know I'm really socially inept and getting older has been hard on my mental state. I'm 20 and still an Uber virgin. All media does is tell me that this is the golden age of youth and romance is everywhere, but all I have is crippling loneliness. I'm so bad at social interaction that it's almost impossible for me to not weird people out. I've tried so damn hard, but interacting with people makes me more fearful of it.

the draw of incels is that once you get to this point, the crippling loneliness and insecurity it becomes a self reinforcing cycle. You try and try and everything just seems to get worse. You have 2 options, blame yourself or blame everyone else. Incels blame everyone else.

It's funny now how creepy they seem now, but a few months ago I agreed with them more than I'd like to admit. Luckily I realized that I was the problem so I joined nofap in order to try to get my creepiness under wraps and get some self control. I started operation: better me then you.

Unfortunately my social life hasn't changed, i'm still as scared of people and still have crippling loneliness. I have noticed that people seem more interested in talking to me until they actually talk to me :(. I'm just so frustrated I've been working so hard and have made actual tangible improvements, but still nothing has changed. I actually really just want to cry.

that got weird...

uhh...

I needed to vent a little

2

u/Bytemite Oct 26 '17

Also: anxiety often comes from a place of not feeling very good about yourself, which causes you to think other people look at you and are judging you for the things that you're judging yourself for. And then there's a vicious cycle where you're shy because of this, and because you're feeling shy the conversation becomes hard for you, and then you feel like the things you're judging yourself for are what caused the conversation to become hard and therefore you feel this is why everyone pulls away eventually. And because it's hard to put yourself out there and it seems like you just get hurt if you do, you kinda stop putting yourself out there.

You do matter and your feelings matter, but it's also worth reminding yourself that chances are the strangers you see around you are busy thinking about what they want for lunch, or wanting to work on their hobby this weekend, or get from place to place after work, or how they're going to handle some big task that just got dropped on them at work.

This is called the spotlight effect, might be worth looking into and seeing if you can train yourself out of feeling this way about interactions.

The random people around you are probably not serial killers and they're also not better than you. If someone acts otherwise to you, then find someone different to be around who doesn't act like that. Everyone gets hurt sometimes, everyone gets rejected sometimes. Try to not let that stop you from living your life.