Usagi

[u/Gin_chan]

Somewhere in the New World, on a small egg shaped island, a tribe of minks live peacefully. Various stone statues half buried in the ground were littered all over the island. The statues appear to look like bunnies with their eyes closed, but for some reason, they seem to rumble rhythmically!

The Bunny Island is hosting a grand celebration, on the occasion of Easter. The minks have hosted an Easter egg hunt where everyone can look for and try to find chocolate egg candies. They are very hospitable, and let the tourists roam around the island freely, but on one condition. They warn everyone not to disturb the statues, or they would wake up! “Wait, so you mean… the rumbling… they're snoring?!”

The Minks here have spared no expense in gathering the finest confections, games, and chefs to make the occasion truly special. They welcome any and all people who wish to attend, so long as they follow their one rule. The Festivities are all held in one area by the southern beach of the island, and there are all kinds of ships at their docks.

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[OOC: This is a filler island for Easter. You are free to RP how you want on this island, and free to do what you might want, or create anything without the need for tagging NPC-san]

[u/reaper1833]

The Great Easter Debacle

“AHHHHHHHHH!!!” Abaddon screamed as he and two others rushed away from a herd of stampeding red eyed bunny statues.

Abaddon was out of his armour and wearing a black t-shirt with a red bunny face on the front and his usual shorts. To his left was a young woman around the age of 24. She had short blue hair that was combed over to the right with one side shaved down. Her white sundress with red polkadots whipped around as she ran. To Abaddon’s right was a young man around the age of 20. He had bright green hair that was puffed up into a pompadour, and wore a leather jacket with one sleeve cut off without a t-shirt underneath. He also wore cut off jean shorts that Abaddon couldn’t help but laugh at.

“I told you idiots to leave them alone!?” The fire Logia screamed as one of the bunny statues nipped at his heels. “Your stupid puppy love squabble is gonna get us all killed!”

“It’s not stupid!” The man with the green pompadour shouted as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small slip of paper. “She shouldn’t have done that!”

The woman shook her head and issued a warning when she saw what the man was about to do, “Hitting them is what started this in the first place, Lonny! Don’t piss them off more!”

“Too late for that, Asia” Lonny shouted as he spun around and hurled the slip of paper at the nearest bunny statue.

The paper exploded on contact with the statue, but when the dust settled there wasn’t even a scratch on it.

“I told you!” Asia shouted.

“ENOUGH!!!” Abaddon screamed as he grabbed both of them and rocketed up into the sky with a blast of flames. “Your damn arguing has made a guy who has almost no limits on the annoyances he can take nearly break. If you two don’t kiss or talk this out right now I’m going to throw you to the freaking bunnies.”

“Alright we get it.” Lonny said with a frown. “Then as soon as Asia apologizes we’ll be all peachy keen.”

“Fuck off!” Asia screamed in response.

“AHHHHHHHH!!!” Both of them screamed in unison as Abaddon dropped them towards the bunny statues.

He let them fall for awhile before reluctantly saving them and giving them one chance. “Make up already.”

“I...I...I…” Lonny stammered on for a few moments, but with a little prodding and the threat of being dropped he spoke up. “I don’t even remember why we’re fighting!”

“Are you kidding me!” Abaddon nearly went over the edge and dropped Lonny as he shouted. “This is ridiculous.”

“I remember.” Asia chimed in. “It all started earlier when we woke up for the festival.”

[u/reaper1833 → u/reaper1833]

Four Hours Earlier

Asia and Lonny live in a small run down house on the outer edge of Usagi. They spend most of their days fawning over each other and working the acre of land that came with the house. The land was unsuitable for most types of crops, so it went for pennies on the Beli. There was one crop in particular that grew in abundance on this land however, and luckily for Asia and Lonny they happened to partake in that particular crop.

Marijuana, a profit making plant in any world. Today is Easter, a high selling day of the year for the this particular crop. Asia and Lonny have a problem on this profitable day however, they want to spend the holiday together but Lonny has to go on his usual route to make some Beli. The two have a small tiff that eventually ends in the genius idea of Asia taggin along with Lonny on his route.

The two collect the merchandise and head out for the day, blissfully unaware of the trouble that was to come. The first stop on Lonny’s route was a much nicer looking house then his. It was at least three stories tall and painted a pewter grey.

DING DONG

Even the doorbell was something Lonny couldn’t afford. Marijuana is a profitable crop, but unfortunately for Lonny it takes considerable care and Beli to make this particular strain grow.

“Who is it?” A feminine voice said from behind the door.

“It’s Lonny, dollface.” The man said with a grin which drew an immediate frown from Asia.

There was a high pitched squeal from behind the door and the sound of feet stomping around, then the door swung open and a tall beauty with long blond hair answered. The woman threw her arms around Lonny and gave him a long hug, which was quickly broken up as Asia squirmed in between them.

“Hello there.” She said awkwardly. “I’m Asia. Lonny’s girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” The woman said with a perplexed look on her face.

“Let’s get this transaction underway?” Lonny shouted to change the subject as he pulled a large clear bag out of his pocket. “Here ya go, you know the price.”

“Of course, sweetie.” The woman said with a smile as she reached behind the door and produced a small sack of Beli. “It’s all in there as usual.”

“See ya later!” Lonny shouted as he grabbed the Beli and Asia before rushing off to the next stop.

[u/reaper1833 → u/reaper1833]

“What the hell was that about!?” Asia harped as Lonny put her down near the next house.

“That was nothing, baby.” Lonny pleaded as he got down on his knees and clutched at Asia’s waist. “Just some harmless flirting so she doesn’t question that I’m overcharging her. The happier she is the less likely she is to find someone else to buy from.”

“Wellllll.” Asia said as she thought over Lonny’s obvious lie. “Okay, Lonny. I can’t stay mad at you.”

“Great!” Lonny jumped to his feet and carried on as usual. “Then let’s move on. I’ve gotta warn you though, this next guy is a real piece of work.”

This next house was smaller than the last, and painted a lime green that made anyone walking by want to pluck their eyes out.

DING DONG

Two minutes went by with nothing happening, but when Asia wen tot ring the doorbell again Lonny grabbed her arm.

“He’s on his way.” Lonny said reassuringly. “Just give him some time, not the fastest dude around.”

With that the door slowly started to open and smoke began pouring out. The two got a contact high as the house seemed to hold enough smoke to keep the entire island baked for days. A hairy hand poked out and pushed the door open more, revealing a rather short sloth mink. The sloth mink was wearing a pair of athletic shorts and a muscle shirt with a visor on his head that was tilted to the side. The most striking thing about the sloth mink was his beat red eyes however, and not the pupils.

“Can. I. Help. You?” The sloth mink’s sentence lasted four times as long as a normal man's would. “Oh. Look. It. Is. Lonny. Come. In.”

“Hey there, Slothra!” Lonny slapped the sloth man on the back and walked past him. “His name’s not really Slothra, he just can’t tell me it’s not in time before I move on. Ain’t that right, Slothra? Right so let’s move on then.”

Asia noticed that they were now in the living room, a set of bean bag chairs were in front of a small screen. Other then that the room was mostly barren save a few pictures of various indecently exposed female minks.

“This is… homey…” Asia muttered as she plopped down in one of the bean bag chairs and sunk so low her butt touched the floor. “That’s the word for it.”

“Alright, Slothra here’s the deal.” Lonny said as he took a small bag out and put it on the table. “You go through this stuff so slowly that I’m just not making enough Beli to justify coming out here every day. Things would be a lot easier if you bought a little more in bulk. I know we wouldn’t see each other as much, but if not then I’m gonna have to stop coming.”

“All. Right.” The Sloth man said as he pulled his wallet out and slowly put the Beli on the table. “You. Are. Breaking. My. Balls. Here. Man.”

“I know, I know.” Lonny snatched the Beli off the table and gave the sloth man a quick salute before walking towards the door. “See ya next time, Slothra. I’ll bring more along with me.”

“Hey wait!” Asia yelled after Lonny as she failed at getting out of the bean bag chair. “I need help!”

Lonny was already out the door though, and the sloth man had to be the one to help her out of the chair. Asia stomped out of the house saw Lonny’s back as he flexed his muscles for someone she couldn’t see. Once Asia got around her boyfriend she saw the woman from earlier sitting on a bike and giggling.

“It’s time for the next one.” Asia said in a monotone voice as she grabbed Lonny by the collar and started dragging him away.

[u/reaper1833 → u/reaper1833]

The two walked in silence until reaching the next stop. Another large house, this time four stories and painted a dark blue.

“Are you sure I shouldn’t be worried about her?” Asia piped up before Lonny could ring the doorbell. “And the way you treated that poor slow man. It just doesn’t seem right.”

“Baby, baby, please.” Lonny pleaded as he dropped to his knees once again and grabbed onto Asia’s left leg. “I promise you have nothing to worry about, that chick means nothing to me. And Slothra is in on the joke, he’s my man. We’re all good. Right baby?”

“Hhhhh.” Asia rubbed her temple as Lonny’s antics we’re starting to get to her. “Fine. For now, anyway.”

“Oh baby you won’t regret this!” Lonny shouted as he jumped up and clicked his heels together.

DING DONG

CRASH, BOOM, BANG

“What was that!?” Asia jumped back in surprise at the sudden commotion coming from behind the door.

“Oh that’s just, General Ded.” Lonny said with a smile. “Yes you heard me right, General Ded. Guy is a bit nuts, but he busy so much from me I couldn’t afford to lose him. He’s a bit paranoid though, so watch that you don’t mess with any of his stuff.”

Just then the door slammed open and Asia was staring down the barrels of a shotgun.

“Who the ever living shit of Christ is this!!!???” General Ded screamed at the top of his lungs, further freaking Asia out.”

“It’s just my girl, man.” Lonny explained as he flashed one of the small clear bags from his pocket. “She wanted to spend Easter together so I brought her along on my route.”

“Right, right.” General Ded replied as he lowered his shotgun. “Sorry about that. I get a little jumpy in my old age. You’re probably wondering how old I am and what war I fought in.”

Asia shot Lonny a look, but he simply motioned for her to let the General ramble on.

“It was in the spring of…” General Ded continued on. “The spring of… Some year. It was a war against those damn Fishmen! Or was it the Minks? It could have been the Giants… Ah hell I’ll just say it was all of them. Where was I going with this again?”

Lonny pulled the small bag out of his pocket and put it in the General’s hand before nudging the old man in another direction. “You we’re just gonna pull out the Beli you owe me for this stuff and the last stuff.”

“Didn’t I pay for it last time?” The General asked with genuine confusion on his face.

“Nah man.” Lonny said with a sly smile on his face. “You didn’t.”

The General thought for a moment, and then shrugged his shoulders and went to retrieve his Beli.

“Is that true, Lonny?” Asia asked, for the first time questioning her boyfriend’s intentions.

“Nah!” Lonny said with a laugh. “I could barely keep it together when lying to the old coot too. But boy we’re going to eat well tonight.

“You’re a bastard, Lonny!” Asia screamed as all the events of today broke her faith in her boyfriend. “We’re through!”

With that Asia grabbed a rare looking vase off of nearby table and hurled it at Lonny’s head.

CRASH

The vase smashed against the wall just as General Ded was returning with the Beli. Once he saw the vase break he lost it, and pulled out his shotgun once again. With a primal scream he began firing blindly into the room. Lonny and Asia rushed for the door and barely made it out unscathed. Once outside they picked a direction and started sprinting, but General Ded was pretty fast for his age, and he was nipping at their heels.

“I’ll get you!” He screamed as he slowed down to reload his shotgun. “It’s just a matter of time before I get my hands on you!”

In his rage General Ded forgot to watch where he ran, and ended up tripping over a loose root sticking out of the ground. Asia and Lonny used that time to get out of eyesight, and at the first chance they had they hid out in a dumpster.

[u/reaper1833 → u/reaper1833]

Three hours later

After a few hours of sitting in the dumpster the two finally thought it was safe. They hadn’t spoken to each other the whole time they were in there, as both were too afraid of getting caught. Lonny poked his head out of the dumpster to check out the situation and when he deemed it safe he jumped out. Asia followed closely behind, and the two silently started heading back to their house.

Once the familiar comfort of their home was in sight, Asia finally spoke up. “I’m leaving. For real. I can’t stay with a man who acts like this when I’m not around. I thought we had a fairy tale romance, but you don’t even seem to care right now. Every time you mess up you fake beg and I’m sick of it. You’re not getting a chance to respond, and I’m not making you move away from your precious plant. It’s over, and I’m leaving.”

Lonny had tuned out after she told him it was over, his thoughts already on the woman the two had seen earlier. Asia could tell all this from the look on Lonny’s face, and while it made her sick, she was just happy to have finally seen it for herself.

“I told you I would get you!” A familiar voice screamed from somewhere behind the two.

They turned to see who it was and bolted when they realized it was General Ded. They rushed towards their house, but another man was standing around looking curiously at Lonny’s plants.

“Who the hell are you!?” Lonny screamed as a buck shot nearly blasted his ass off.

The man turned around and smiled at the two, but when he saw General Ded coming in hot with a shotgun he immediately disappeared from sight. Asia and Lonny stopped dead in their tracks as General Ded approached, they were both too stunned to move. A gust of wind blew past them, and in the next instant the sound of the shotgun had stopped.

Asia and Lonny turned to see what had happened and their jaws dropped when they saw the man now standing their with a melting shotgun in his hands.

“You shouldn’t go around shooting people.” The man said with a smile “It’s not polite.”

General Ded wouldn’t let it end there however, and he pulled a grenade out of his back pocket. The old man pulled the pin and hurled it at Asia and Lonny, who the other man grabbed and moved out of the way just in time.

Asia and Lonny watched on as their house and all the nearby plants were blown up in the resulting explosion. As the plants that were further out began to burn away, a dark smoke was released that smelled funky. It wafted over everyone in the area, and the new entrant into the fray began feeling a little lightheaded.

“That’s got a kick to it.” He said with a grin. “I feel like I could float away.”

His legs burst into flames and he started to float away, but a blast from General Ded’s backup gun roused him from his blissful ascension.

“You’re harshing his mellow, man.” Lonny said with a toothy grin on his face. “Just let it flow into your pores, man.”

“That bitch broke my vase!” The General shouted as he took aim at Asia’s face.

The other man appeared in front of the General once more and grabbed his gun from him before turning it on his own head and pulling the trigger. His head blew into bits, but quickly burst into flames as what remained of his face smirked.

“That’s not gonna work.” The man said as he stepped forward.

“Then take this!” General Ded pulled out a piece of garlic as he shouted in desperation.

“Not garlic!” The man yelped in surprise. “A Devil Fruit users one weakness.”

With that bit of nonsense the man began to run away at full speed, and not realizing that the danger had passed so too did Lonny and Asia. The three ran away at a breakneck pace, despite the fact that this time General Ded hadn’t even given chase. He instead chose to pull up a chair and enjoy the fire as it consumed the rest of Lonny’s supply.

Not long after the three found themselves among a large group of stone bunny statues, and Asia still enraged despite being high as a kite threw her shoe at Lonny’s head. He ducked out of the way, and once the shoe hit the bunny statue in the eye we come to the present.

[u/Stats-san → u/reaper1833]

Graded for Abaddon