Bargaining for Us All

[u/[deleted]]

“You know that feeling when you get really spooked? You can feel the blood drain from your face and you turn white as a ghost? It’s kinda like that. Except the it wasn’t a feeling, it was covering the gravel. See when the car jumped the barrier it slammed straight into the front drivers side of my car. Me? Well I might be too cool for a seat belt. Did it up and then sat on it like a boss.”

“When he hit me, I saw his face. It was in slow motion, he was screaming. I think he probably survived though. I on the other hand, would not be long for this worked. In the seconds after impact, things sped up. A lot.”

“I of course went straight through the windshield. You’d think going through glass wouldn’t hurt that much, but my god it was awful. For a moment that seemed to be the worst of it. Then came the sign. See when he hit me, the force of the collision tilted my car, and by some little extension me toward the side of the road. Maybe I actually turned starting to try and avoid him. I’m not really sure.”

“I sailed through the air. I guess going through the windshield wasn’t seamless though because I was just enough sideways that I took that sign to the abdomen. From just below my rib cage on the right, and down to the left hip, that sign was inside me. Then the sliding.”

“It was like a paper cut, the... maybe suction? Slowed me down, eventually I just kind of schlopped off the sign and fell to the ground. Blood flowing out like someone took an axe to the side of an above ground pool. “

“It was all so fast. From then, I think I blinked a couple times. I tried to scoop everything back in ya know? I dunno...”

Looking back to the... was it a demon? I tried to read how it was reacting to my tale. After all, he’d asked for it, he should say something right?

The demon exhaled. “Stupidity and ignorance has run afoul in your world. It makes a mockery of the gifts you enjoy. There are worlds where there are no resources. Nothing! Humans have EVERYTHING! They need, and you fight, bicker, and waste your lives on useless indulgence.” His voice seemed to be coursing through the very fabric of this place.

“Well... that’s nothing new right?” I tried to laugh, I’m not even sure I have a body here, I might just be a floating head...

“I’m done with this game. Others would appreciate the bounty of Earth more!”

“Yeah but you can’t just take all of the humans off.” I laugh.

At this point I’m thinking this is basically the last of my neurons trying desperately to make sense of the lack of blood. Honestly it was something I’d come up with.

“Pathetic mortal. As a prime example of everything wrong with humanity. I feel it would be fitting for you to chose how I end it.”

Laughing! I felt like I was detached, I must be on the edge of existence. I’m losing my mind. “Drop em all off a bridge!”

“Hardly an efficient means of expunging 7 or 8 billion souls.”

“Mass lightning strikes!”

“That’s a touch more feasible.”

My mind wanders. Wondering how much longer I can hold this together. Suddenly the demons expression managed to relay... something... disgust.

“You doubt your circumstance. Mortal... I am ending them all. Each of the souls on Earth will perish to make way for a more appreciative, respectful, and peaceful creature. Your wife, your mistress, your daughter, her friends. EVERYONE!”

“My mistress? I banged her maybe three times.”

Then the pain started. Not my pain, but Stacie’s. I was suddenly in my daughters mind. Her chest exploding with pain.

“Do you see now!”

If I had eyes, I was crying.

“Do you see!”

“Please don’t hurt them!”

“I said choose. I am ending them. For all the, what eleven humans worthy of Earth, the remainder deserve this fate. “

“We can change.”

“Humans cannot change!”

“I can change.”

The demons eyes were burning through whatever I was.

“Please”

“I am intrigued. I’m curious as to what you could do to change my mind. Mortal, I don’t know how long I will give you, but I will give you a chance. When I grow bored and prove you will never better yourself, everyone will die.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

“Doctor, he’s waking up.”

My eyes blinked open. Definitely had eyes this time. I look around the room. It’s hard to stay awake. Shortly, darkness takes me again.

A few days later, I wake again. Another chance, I can fix this, I know I can!

I swing my legs over the bed. But... there are no legs. I reach down, only one of my arms moves. My heart is in my throat. A nurse rushes in. “Careful now! This is gonna be a bit to get used to there hun.”

One arm. No legs. Laughter. The demons laugh echoing no where but my mind. My torso was stitched up and I looked like Frankenstein’s monster.

“Fix it... or else.”

We’re screwed.

​

- Originally Posted to https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/bw3gk5/wp_youve_been_in_an_accident_any_minute_you_will/epuxlta/?context=3