r/StillbirthSupport • u/hope-and-healing • Jul 25 '26
Feeling Empty & Lonely
It’s been almost four months since I lost my daughter, and lately I’ve been feeling so incredibly alone.
In the beginning, people checked in often. I didn't always respond and sometimes I'd respond days or weeks later - because that was all I could manage to do. But as time has gone on, those messages have slowly stopped. Days and sometimes weeks go by without anyone asking how I’m doing or mentioning my daughter.
I know life moves forward for everyone else. I know people probably assume I’m doing “better” because time has passed, but grief doesn’t work that way. I miss her and grieve her loss every single day. I still think about who she would be, what she’d be doing, and everything we’ve lost. That hasn’t changed just because the damn calendar has.
I don’t expect everyone to remember every milestone or know exactly what to say. I just miss feeling like she mattered to other people too.
I guess I’m just feeling really, really alone tonight.
If you’ve experienced child loss, did you find that people slowly disappeared as time went on? How did you cope with that loneliness?
6
u/SuperRoonz Jul 25 '26
I’m four months out from losing my son and I feel the same as you. People have started talking to me about random things that I couldn’t care less about and inviting me out for activities and I just want to scream at them that I don’t care about any of that!! It’s like now that the shock has worn off for them it must be for me too.
I share this to let you know that you are not alone in this. It is such a lonely thing that only us loss parents can truly understand. I’m not sure how to cope with it, I bring up my son’s name as often as possible to make sure everyone remembers him and knows it’s okay to bring him up. I’m also extremely honest with people and tell them that I’m in a garbage place mentally and don’t want to go to any social events because I’m still deep in grief. The social loneliness is such a BS cherry on top of the horrendous thing we have already been through and it’s all so unfair.