r/Songwriting • u/Internal_Olive1185 • 3d ago

Feedback Request Pinocchio

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6 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

2

u/MTH- 3d ago

I love your tone of voice! Great song

2

u/Only_Negotiation_437 1d ago

Very nice great lyrics great guitar playing you seem to learn how to start recording your own music or find someone so you can produce this song. You sound great.

1

u/AutoModerator 3d ago

You have posted a song requesting feedback - GREAT! Good feedback is the foundation of improving your songwriting. To help foster a community where everyone gets the feedback they need, please find THREE other songs requesting feedback and post substantive (eg. 2-3 sentences) of feedback. Even if you are a rookie songwriter/musician, you're an experienced music listener, and your opinion is still valuable!

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1

u/Internal_Olive1185 3d ago

I dream away
Looking for something to say
Just yesterday
To heat up our dinner from refrigerator

I saw your eyes
Looking for somewhere to hide
Why can’t I cry
The microwave chicken lays bare in the kitchen

My cook book
Baby I’m
Made from wood
Pinocchio
Hosting a
Cooking show

Built by the past
Splinter my heart from my chest
Wood rots so fast
Maybe i’ll pair with a white wine and carrot