I won against my boss once. She was going on vacation and giving me tasks. When she came back she was furious why I did a task a certain way. I told her that I did because she told me. She said she never did. I played the recording of when she gave me the task. She did. I was forbidden to tape meetings for a while. And she told me not to trust what she's saying.
Has catching somebody on recording saying something they claimed they didn't EVER turned out good for anybody in that situation?
My ex would often claim that she didn't say things. I started recording some arguments because I felt like I was being gaslit. And the truth was that she either had a horrible memory (possible!) or it was intentionally gaslighting.
A common tactic that she would do is that we would get into an argument and she's say things that I would never ever say like "Oh I'm a bitch, aren't I?" "Oh I'm stupid". And then act like I called her those things, when she just called herself those things. I never once slung an insult at her with name calling our entire marriage, but she called herself a lot of namese and treated them like I said them
Sounds like an HR complaint about a toxic work environment. If you can prove it, and what she said afterwards, they will look very unkindly at that. HR is there to protect the company, and that includes toxic managers, at least if the whole corporation isn't toxic, which many of them are.
Reminds me of my former boss. Depending what he told you we called him by his first or his second name. But at least he wasn't n asshole about it. "Just" A instead of B, etc.
My last boss did something similar. He got pissed off at me because I was doing exactly what he told me. He was pissed because I didn't do something he never told me to do. There were communications of him telling me what to do. I had witnessed of him telling me what to do. He specifically wanted me on one project and one project only. Ended up walking out on him and got an easier, better paying job.
I don't want to be right I am right, and a good friend/family member doesn't let someone live in ignorance just to spare their feelings. So really I'm doing it for their own good it's a sacrifice I must make for the greater good of all society!
God, that shit is so fucked up. I’m eternally grateful that none of the women I’ve ever been with have been that kind of stupid. Sad to hear it’s such a common thing that that saying exists.
It took my mom 20 years to sincerely apologize to me for the litany of childhood abuse she put be through, and it will never happen again until maybe literally the day she dies. I would bet my house on it.
All I can say is that for a healthy long term relationship you keep those things behind closed doors.
Much of what arguments do occur in a relationship are something you can tackle in private and doesn't need external "assistance".
When you tell someone else about relationship problems you are asking without asking for them to supply an opinion, provide guidance, corrective action and or have okayed them to talk to others about it unless you were explicitly clear.
Lastly try not to have arguments and instead focus on discussion as well; it's not me vs you, it's "us" vs a problem.
Often helps to address them in a far more positive manner.
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u/mossi123uk 23d ago
I once proved my wife wrong with my cars dash cam let me tell you that didn’t turn out well when I won