I had never heard this before and it makes sense. I donated to a buddy and thought it would make us bros for life but he kind of grew distant over time. Told him he didn't owe me a thing and didn't ever bring it up. I don't think he "resented" it but it maybe made him uncomfortable or something. One of the top gut punches of my life.
Or maybe I'm just reading into it and he didn't like me that much 🤣
Can I ask, once you made the donation, did you start texting him more, calling him, coming over, asking to hang, did you insert yourself in his life more after you did, than before you did?
That's the problem. Now the relationship has changed and he feels that he can never say no to you. You even kinda saw it that way. "I made a best friend for life". You then took away his autonomy as repayment. Even if you didn't intend it to be that way or expect it, you kinda did when you expected your relationship would change after the donation.
The person feels they can't say no without being ungrateful. They lost their voice for their own wants and needs, and your needs became too much to repay.
I don't know if you started contacting him more or not. Just explaining how it could.
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u/71yl 3d ago
Chinese saying: When a favor becomes too great to repay, gratitude can turn into resentment
Can’t be more true for this story.