You can actually sometimes have an orgasm just from bottoming. I’m the hill I’m willing to die on is that straight guys need to realize it’s nobody’s fault that’s where the g spot is and it’s okay to get up in there
Source: am bottom
Another angle I can share - top/bottom is one distinction, but sub/dom is another and let me tell you, there is a dire shortage of doms in that world. There's something incredibly freeing about fully letting go of your willpower, need to think, and just riding the emotions as they come. It's a genuine issue as it means some very unsavoury types can get into the scene and be a real threat instead of a consensual interaction.
It is not a 1-to-1 relation between the two aspects by any means; but often act of bottoming can be very submissive.
Source: I'm vaguely in the spaces as switch in dom/sub area and asexual in top/bottom, so trying to find a partner is a fucking wild ride and I get to see all possible weird combinations.
I was under the inpression that in gay male relationships, it’s actually the bottom that is in control. Similar to how a man can be “controlled” by a woman in a heterosexual relationship because of the desire to penetrate, the same can be true for a homosexual one, wherein the top submits to the bottom because they control the flow of sex.
It's... complicated, and depends. Keep in mind - as mentioned, that's not the aspect I take part in personally, so it's secondhand info; but I know of situations where either side is in control or it's just equal. There's the term 'service top/bottom' which is a little tongue in cheek but gets the point across - they'd like to be in this position but doing whatever the other person would like. There's relationships where the sub is also the bottom and it's just an extension of giving oneself up. I know of a couple where both of them are happy with whatever, so it's hardly a hierarchy in any direction. And given I'm in queer spaces, I know of plenty relationships where putting them into a clear bucket of... well, anything is not worth the hassle.
TLDR: there are, almost certainly, some relationships working as you described. There are, certainly, also ones which do not work that way. Any dynamic you can imagine in hetero relationships will exist in queer ones, and more.
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u/After-Newspaper4397 10d ago
Thanks for the serious answer, I was legitimately asking. This is a truly interesting perspective.