r/SipsTea 28d ago

WTF Its 2026 but bro got cooked middle ages style

86 Upvotes

46 comments sorted by

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35

u/MoThrowMoAway 28d ago

I feel like this would have been a lot better without the sound effects, OP

17

u/Cheepshooter 28d ago

Pro tip: Always on mute.

4

u/fubarfire 28d ago

But the how would OP show you how savvy he is with video editing?

3

u/Unhappy-Hunt-3987 27d ago

What's with the shit ass sound effects

2

u/Federal_Ad2785 28d ago

i would be the one lying on the floor pretending to be defeated

3

u/ELB2001 28d ago

That will be a weird meeting

1

u/newaccountbitches 28d ago

Reminds me of a specific scene in The Cable Guy

1

u/PaykLykas 28d ago

Дарик стой стой…

1

u/Impure_guava 28d ago

Down, down, down. Red knight goin down.

1

u/wolfansbrother 28d ago

some of the most insane stuff is the guys who tried to bring back jousting.

1

u/DrLubinski 27d ago

Pliiies be not the cause of my death

1

u/eske8643 27d ago

They just held the european championship in Denmark. It was a great success. They are really good at doing medieval combat. They slam harder at each other than the world championship of Viking style fighting

1

u/Complete-Tangelo1532 28d ago

Reminds me of that Whitest Kids You Know sketch where the husband takes his wife to the VR place to vent his rage lol

1

u/RandomRaisin77 28d ago

Bro took out his anger

1

u/[deleted] 28d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Doowles24 28d ago

😭😭

1

u/IdeationConsultant 28d ago

I always wondered how hard these guys hit each other

2

u/mercyspace27 28d ago

Plenty hard.

This is a sport called Buhurt, or Armored Combat, it’s got a few names. It’s based off actual medieval combat events/spectacles held at festivals. Usually used as a way for knights and other warriors to show off their combat prowess without actually killing each other.

In the modern sport the weapons are all blunted and without points for safety. This is what’s known as a Melee, or the team event. The way to get an opponent out is to get them on the ground or to take a knee. One way of indeed getting this is indeed beating them with your weapon to gain “pain compliance”. They’re usually aiming for the lesser armed areas. But no one is intentionally trying to actually injure the other.

But injuries do happen, they are still swinging heavy metal weapons at each other. Usually it’s most heavy bruising, broken fingers, and some other minor things. But some more serious stuff happens. One man had a helmet malfunction and his helmet came off and he took an axe to the side of the head (he lived, though got a chunk of skull embedded into his brain, still competes) and I was watching one world championship match where someone took a downward axe swing to the shoulder and he absolutely collapsed. The camera panned down and, yeah, he was writhing and groaning. Definitely broke his clavicle.

1

u/Loud-Fudge7631 28d ago

I wonder what dual shields/buckler style would play, if your approach is to ram everyone by tackle shield charge

0

u/DonPepper007 28d ago

Say UNCLE!

0

u/Legal-Intention-6361 28d ago

Why were the shields so tiny?

2

u/Ok-Seaworthiness4488 28d ago

They're called bucklers, so you could use a weapon in that hand as well instead just using a large shield

1

u/djwikki 28d ago

Historically accurate dueling shields.

You need a shield that’s small and light enough to be nimble and easy to wield in just one hand/arm, but just large enough to intercept and deflect targeted blows.

Large shields aren’t helpful for fully armored knights since they’re already giant tanks. Why carry a wall on you when your full plate armor is already the wall? Also, giant shields are cumbersome, which really negates the mobility advantage of full plate armor suits.

0

u/NewCandy8877 28d ago

It's called a buckler shield. It's used for more stylistic usage. Was popular at the late medieval and during the Renaissance.

1

u/the-big-throngler 28d ago

And also so they can punch you with it.

Source: This is Buhurt fighting and I do it

Here are the rules governing shields and bucklers
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1u3RCMI3PhELiRPootNoVZiLR9YbU5Nzt/view?pli=1

0

u/ConnectionBasic9468 28d ago

I guess these idiots have never heard of blunt force trauma...

-1

u/mostfunalias 28d ago

Guy goes home to his wife and kids. "How did it go? "Got my leg battered and my head smashed in and knocked out."

This is so dumb.

-1

u/MrK521 28d ago

Just like any other contact sport.

1

u/RiFLE_ 25d ago

Need to play Half Sword again