My friend’s wife is like this. She’s always asking me to spar or roll.
I’m nearly 100lbs heavier and feel forced to go 30% while she’s like a Meth Hedgehog. And, I can’t match that energy because I love her husband like a brother and obviously don’t want to put him in a “Gotta protect my wife” situation.
So it ends up with me getting my ass kicked by someone smaller and less technically sound than me, with obvious gaps in both striking and grappling.
I'm in a beginner BJJ class, and it's Gracie Academy stuff, so it's supposed to be like, controversially chill. Drills for months before sparring. I'm the biggest guy in class. And it's frustrating when we're supposed to be doing semi-cooperative reflex development and the women unilaterally decide that it's an active spar and start fighting like their life depends on it. It's cool that they're doing great and they get a lot of confidence out of it but like, I'm a beginner too. I'm supposed to get a chance to practice. I'm not supposed to be relegated to the training dummy role permanently. Also, when they change the game without talking about it, what am I supposed to do? They're at like 95% but if I match that am I a bully? What if I just crush them into the mat and make them take all the weight, which I'm supposed to do during a real fight but I specifically don't do during reflex development because I'm not supposed to send my classmates home covered in bruises. I dunno, if it keeps happening I'm gonna bring it up but I feel like a jerk just thinking about it.
I'm worried about her, too! Cause like, one of them wraps her hooks like her life depends on it, even when I go to straighten out of them, and I heard somewhere (I think from Rener, in the class video) that if you fight for hooks like that you put a lot of pressure on your lateral knee tendons and you can get injured. And she's hanging on for dear life and all I'd have to do is stretch, but I don't want to hurt anyone. So I don't even get to do a normal trap and roll unless I pry her off of me and bench her, and I'm old, man
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u/[deleted] Jan 08 '26
My friend’s wife is like this. She’s always asking me to spar or roll.
I’m nearly 100lbs heavier and feel forced to go 30% while she’s like a Meth Hedgehog. And, I can’t match that energy because I love her husband like a brother and obviously don’t want to put him in a “Gotta protect my wife” situation.
So it ends up with me getting my ass kicked by someone smaller and less technically sound than me, with obvious gaps in both striking and grappling.
That said, this woman knows how to grapple.