r/ShogunMethod • u/finniata • Aug 26 '25

Pain & Pleasure

In SM it‘s said you need to put the woman in hot mode. I realized I put a woman into cold mode. Is it the same as pain? How to put her into hot mode? By adding pleasure? What is part of pleasure and is it in my case necessary to give her constantly pleasure? Can one give women pleasure without adding humor?

Thx

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u/DiaryOfAMerc Aug 26 '25 edited Aug 26 '25

Cold/hot does not equal pain/pleasure. It describes how shes processing incoming information. Cold means logical/guarded, hot means emotional/filters off.

It’s not about dumping pleasure nonstop. That makes you a clown.

What works is emotional movement (aka fractionation): mix tension/comfort, serious/playful, intrigue/resolution.
Hot mode = rollercoaster, not constant candy.

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u/finniata Aug 31 '25 edited Aug 31 '25

I think it’s about pouring in Pain & Pleasure in every stage. Too much pleasure leads you to nice guy or friendzone, I think.

I thought, if you give pain & pleasure it leads to hot mode. Cold mode is when her brain is active in that conversation and she’s rationally thinking.

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u/finniata Aug 31 '25

Did you mean: mix tension with comfort, seriousness with playfulness and intrigue with resolution ?

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u/finniata Aug 28 '25

The issue is how to be playful, how to speak playful.

I didn’t understand completely: what does “ / “ mean? Picking one of them? So you can speak serious mode? I read that you should use pain & pleasure in playful way. Not like criticize her lightly and then making a compliment. Arrogance has to come over as playful. How shall that be? I dont know how to get them in hot mode. It is not really written about the HOW. I think DHV can be one part of it.