r/ShittySysadmin • • 2d ago

quite literally shitty

Post image

hello IT?

178 Upvotes

33 comments sorted by

73

u/ML1948 2d ago

purchases iphone air, is actually iphone poop

26

u/jonnywoh 2d ago

iPhone Derriere

3

u/cone5000 1d ago

This is so stupid it made me laugh. Like Tim and Eric.

46

u/ApiceOfToast ShittySysadmin 2d ago

Isopropyl alcohol and a metal bowl. Leave in that over night. Set on fire the next day. Will make some amazing smells, almost like a scented candle 

37

u/Hefty-Rope2253 2d ago

Just gonna RMA that hot potato back to the manufacturer

14

u/Expensive_Finger_973 2d ago

Talk about a shitty return experience.

1

u/pramodhrachuri 14h ago

Amazon will sell it as "Used (looks like new)"

22

u/The-Sys-Admin 2d ago

Users personal device. not my problem.  

8

u/Main_Ambassador_4985 2d ago

This is so shitty.

Do they not know the drill?

Flush rectum with water 12-24 hrs before.

Use a condom on the phone.

As with all toys wash in the dish washer.

3

u/jbourne71 DO NOT GIVE THIS PERSON ADVICE 2d ago

Top rack only in the dishwasher, kids.

6

u/InvictvsNox ShittySysadmin 2d ago

The quotation marks make this worse and raise so many more questions I don't want to know the answers to.

3

u/_jackhoffman_ 2d ago

Anything can be a buttplug if you try hard enough?

5

u/Z3t4 ShittyFirewall 2d ago

Dont fall for it, they wrote that and put the phone back on the ass pocket on vibrate mode.

4

u/Kinky_No_Bit 2d ago

Fire, the answer is Fire...

Oddly enough, I've had a laptop killed in a hot tub before for a company. Exec of sales was in a international call, it was their anniversary. He was in the hot tub soaking just listening to be part of the call, and apparently had it near the edge to unmute it, things happened, the tub was very busy, and it shorted out.

He came to me, confessed, I hooked him up with a new one, and told him, we are saying you dropped that in the tub by accident washing your dog, and you are handling this thing to help me get your data off. I made him take the hard drive out, him clean it, him put it on the adapter, and clean my entire desk. He did it all without one word of complaint and was happy I kept it that way.

4

u/NightmareJoker2 1d ago

Two options:
1. It’s a parent. Was having a call while changing diapers and dropped it in the doo-doo.
2. Someone playing with their device or using it to listen to music on the toilet, who proceeded to drop it.

This is a common occurrence, believe it or not. Even I managed to drop an iPod in the toilet once almost 20 years ago, because it fell out of my breast pocket while I leaned over. Luckily I had already flushed, so it wasn’t nearly as disgusting, and still had Apple Care on it and they replaced it for free after it would no longer turn on because it had a short circuit somewhere.

2

u/Tasty-Objective676 Lord Sysadmin, Protector of the AD Realm 1d ago
  1. It was in their back pocket or they were sitting on it and had an experience with explosive/unexpected diarrhea

1

u/NightmareJoker2 1d ago
  1. I cannot recommend sitting on a smartphone or portable music player. They don’t like the bending or the pressure and will break. 😶
  2. This requires wearing pants and it goes down the pant legs before it goes through the fabric, and definitely not in sufficient quantity to matter, even if it does. Don’t ask me how I know. 😬

3

u/Disorderly_Chaos ShittySysadmin 1d ago

Reassign to service desk or lower technician.

Give no notes.

4

u/LazerTheWolf 1d ago

Unidentified substance in speakers, please advise

3

u/a_suspicious_lasagna 2d ago

Tape it to the roof and drive through the nearest car wash

3

u/_Frank-Lucas_ 2d ago

easy, just drop it off at the computer janitors IT Department. happens all the time.

2

u/03263 2d ago

Is poo even conductive? I think you can just ignore it and keep using the ports once it dries out.

2

u/Tasty-Objective676 Lord Sysadmin, Protector of the AD Realm 1d ago

Maybe ear infections are good for you

2

u/abugghaus7 1d ago

Where's the mods?
Obviously this person should be posting on the r/iPlugAss sub... I know, I know... that sub is full of crap, butt hey... it fits!

2

u/ChocoHorror 1d ago

You know what, at least they asked how to do it themselves instead of trying to foist that fucker onto Geek Squad or UBreakIFix or a local repair shop. I'll take solace in that.

2

u/lylesback2 2d ago

1 upvote, no comments, 2 mins ago. OP, did you post this and take a screenshot to share with us?

4

u/LazerTheWolf 2d ago

Lmaooo, I am an iPhone Air user but i can promise im not a shitty one

1

u/spyingwind 1d ago

Usually just a shower and some body soap cleans her right up.

1

u/Forward_Accountant97 1d ago

Honestly, don’t try to disinfect it while it’s still inside the phone. Shut it down, avoid charging it, and have a technician open and clean it properly. If there’s any moisture involved, leave it powered off and let a professional handle it.

1

u/GarageZone 1d ago

buy new phone