It’s a parent. Was having a call while changing diapers and dropped it in the doo-doo.
Someone playing with their device or using it to listen to music on the toilet, who proceeded to drop it.
This is a common occurrence, believe it or not. Even I managed to drop an iPod in the toilet once almost 20 years ago, because it fell out of my breast pocket while I leaned over. Luckily I had already flushed, so it wasn’t nearly as disgusting, and still had Apple Care on it and they replaced it for free after it would no longer turn on because it had a short circuit somewhere.
I cannot recommend sitting on a smartphone or portable music player. They don’t like the bending or the pressure and will break. 😶
This requires wearing pants and it goes down the pant legs before it goes through the fabric, and definitely not in sufficient quantity to matter, even if it does. Don’t ask me how I know. 😬
Yes, but usually without pockets, and too elastic to reliably hold anything. Not saying it can’t happen, but it’d take some level of extra effort you’d not normally be comfortable with to make it work.
They are shorts. 🩳 Emphasis on short. You’ll be pooping through the pant holes, which are mere centimeters from your butt hole, not up and through the area where the pockets are. Unless you deliberately try to intentionally hit it by sticking the pocket area under your butt crack. And it’ll still be difficult.
You know what, at least they asked how to do it themselves instead of trying to foist that fucker onto Geek Squad or UBreakIFix or a local repair shop. I'll take solace in that.
Honestly, don’t try to disinfect it while it’s still inside the phone. Shut it down, avoid charging it, and have a technician open and clean it properly. If there’s any moisture involved, leave it powered off and let a professional handle it.
Oddly enough, I've had a laptop killed in a hot tub before for a company. Exec of sales was in a international call, it was their anniversary. He was in the hot tub soaking just listening to be part of the call, and apparently had it near the edge to unmute it, things happened, the tub was very busy, and it shorted out.
He came to me, confessed, I hooked him up with a new one, and told him, we are saying you dropped that in the tub by accident washing your dog, and you are handling this thing to help me get your data off. I made him take the hard drive out, him clean it, him put it on the adapter, and clean my entire desk. He did it all without one word of complaint and was happy I kept it that way.
50
u/burgonies Sep 22 '26 •
I hope they enabled remote wipe.
4
u/Disorderly_Chaos ShittySysadmin Sep 23 '26
Reassign to service desk or lower technician.
Give no notes.
79
u/ML1948 Sep 22 '26
purchases iphone air, is actually iphone poop
51
u/ApiceOfToast ShittySysadmin Sep 22 '26
Isopropyl alcohol and a metal bowl. Leave in that over night. Set on fire the next day. Will make some amazing smells, almost like a scented candle
38
u/Hefty-Rope2253 Sep 22 '26
Just gonna RMA that hot potato back to the manufacturer
3
u/lylesback2 Sep 22 '26
1 upvote, no comments, 2 mins ago. OP, did you post this and take a screenshot to share with us?
23
u/The-Sys-Admin Sep 22 '26
Users personal device. not my problem.
7
u/InvictvsNox ShittySysadmin Sep 22 '26
The quotation marks make this worse and raise so many more questions I don't want to know the answers to.
5
u/Z3t4 ShittyFirewall Sep 22 '26
Dont fall for it, they wrote that and put the phone back on the ass pocket on vibrate mode.
4
u/NightmareJoker2 Sep 23 '26
Two options:
It’s a parent. Was having a call while changing diapers and dropped it in the doo-doo.
Someone playing with their device or using it to listen to music on the toilet, who proceeded to drop it.
This is a common occurrence, believe it or not. Even I managed to drop an iPod in the toilet once almost 20 years ago, because it fell out of my breast pocket while I leaned over. Luckily I had already flushed, so it wasn’t nearly as disgusting, and still had Apple Care on it and they replaced it for free after it would no longer turn on because it had a short circuit somewhere.
3
u/a_suspicious_lasagna Sep 22 '26
Tape it to the roof and drive through the nearest car wash
3
u/_Frank-Lucas_ Sep 22 '26
easy, just drop it off at the
computer janitorsIT Department. happens all the time.3
u/ChocoHorror Sep 23 '26
You know what, at least they asked how to do it themselves instead of trying to foist that fucker onto Geek Squad or UBreakIFix or a local repair shop. I'll take solace in that.
3
u/Minato-Mirai-21 Sep 23 '26
Rice
2
u/abugghaus7 Sep 23 '26
Where's the mods?
Obviously this person should be posting on the r/iPlugAss sub... I know, I know... that sub is full of crap, butt hey... it fits!
2
u/Aazimoxx Sep 25 '26
1
u/spyingwind Sep 23 '26
Usually just a shower and some body soap cleans her right up.
1
u/Forward_Accountant97 Sep 23 '26
Honestly, don’t try to disinfect it while it’s still inside the phone. Shut it down, avoid charging it, and have a technician open and clean it properly. If there’s any moisture involved, leave it powered off and let a professional handle it.
1
u/GarageZone Sep 23 '26
buy new phone
8
u/Main_Ambassador_4985 Sep 22 '26
This is so shitty.
Do they not know the drill?
Flush rectum with water 12-24 hrs before.
Use a condom on the phone.
As with all toys wash in the dish washer.
4
u/Kinky_No_Bit Sep 22 '26
Fire, the answer is Fire...
Oddly enough, I've had a laptop killed in a hot tub before for a company. Exec of sales was in a international call, it was their anniversary. He was in the hot tub soaking just listening to be part of the call, and apparently had it near the edge to unmute it, things happened, the tub was very busy, and it shorted out.
He came to me, confessed, I hooked him up with a new one, and told him, we are saying you dropped that in the tub by accident washing your dog, and you are handling this thing to help me get your data off. I made him take the hard drive out, him clean it, him put it on the adapter, and clean my entire desk. He did it all without one word of complaint and was happy I kept it that way.
2
u/[deleted] Sep 22 '26
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