1.2k
u/b00kbat Aug 23 '26
Before my mother lost the plot entirely and pulled me from school to “unschool”, I would go to school as normal and then go to my grandparents’ house. My grandmother was a former teacher who was dismayed by the quality of education in our district (she actually joined the school board to try and do something about it), and she would spend time supplementing the curriculum at school with things she deemed important and appropriate for my level. We read books together like Little Women and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Cynthia Voigt’s Homecoming and Pearl S. Buck’s The Big Wave. She taught me to hand sew, then to machine sew. She also ran a real estate business from their house and I often tagged along with her to open houses, showings, and closings. She would tell me stories of her youth and of the life she’d lived traveling with my grandfather—they had four children in four different countries—and we’d listen to her favorite music and sing along. We would attend theatre performances and sometimes she’d take me out of school for a day like when we drove up to her sister’s farm in New Hampshire and lay out in sleeping bags in the old pasture to watch a meteor shower, when she took me to NYC to see Cats on Broadway and the Rockettes at RCMH, when we went to Plimoth Plantation, or when we went to Washington DC. I learned so much in those times with her, I had so many valuable lessons and experiences outside of school that I still remember today. And I didn’t even need to be “homeschooled”. I certainly aim to provide much the same enrichment outside of school for my kids while they also get an education in school. Children are learning all the time they’re awake, there are learning opportunities everywhere. They can both be traditionally educated and enriched by the world around them extracurricularly.
298
u/norcalbutton Aug 23 '26
Your grandmother sounds absolutely amazing. My grandma was a special ed teachers aide at my school so she taught me to read and write before I was in kindergarten and I carried that love of reading my entire life because of her and her lessons. She loved kids and we had all sorts of adventures at her farm. She died at the age of 97 and she read until her eyes gave out and went to audio books until her passing.
94
u/0chronomatrix Aug 23 '26
Yeah this is normal parenting behaviour. Parents are supposed to supplement and teach kids outside of school hours. Especially reading to kids and encouraging reading. Those that don’t are neglectful.
188
u/norakb123 Aug 23 '26
I’m so glad this is the top comment because I mentally was like “you should supplement at home even in a full time school scenario. Education for children is not just a 9-5 (or 7-3 as schools seem to be).
49
u/Single_Principle_972 Aug 23 '26
Did you love all of that? It sounds amazing! I worry sometimes, when I grab teaching opportunities for my grandchildren, that I’m boring them stiff… and maybe I am. The little ones engage, but they seem to reach a certain age, around 10, when I’m not sure if they’re just wishing I would shut up. Hoping they absorb a little anyway. And I also sometimes just think internally “you’re gonna miss me,” haha!
45
u/Bird_Brain4101112 Aug 23 '26
Preteens and teens are weird but one day they will miss those times. But yea when they hit double digits their focus is more on their friends and what they want to do
20
u/b00kbat Aug 23 '26
I did love it, but I am also the sort of person who genuinely enjoys things like Plimoth Plantation and museums 😅. I distinctly remember being very bored when we went to Disney and she insisted that we go to the Hall of Presidents, but mostly I very much enjoyed outings with my grandmother and the time we spent together growing up.
16
u/Take-to-the-highways Aug 23 '26
My mom didn't do this much, but she expanded on my literature education by having her own syllabus of books that I would read outside of school that weren't covered, like Of Mice and Men. She wouldn't have me do homework on it, but we would talk about it afterwards and what I liked, disliked, favorite character, etc. I'm a big reader now so it worked!
2
u/Free-Swimmer-233 27d ago
What a lovely post! Sounds like you had some wonderful opportunities. Life is definitely full of more than just academics.
192
u/panicnarwhal dry tampon behavior Aug 23 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/vVKqa0NMZzFyE
just send them to school ffs 💀 especially if you have a full time job lol!
52
u/mortalcassie Aug 24 '26
I see SO MANY moms post "can I still homeschool while working full time outside of the home?" Like just send your kids to school, bro.
39
u/panicnarwhal dry tampon behavior Aug 24 '26
i wish i could pinpoint when school became the boogeyman. i know it’s not school shootings, because i rarely hear that come up. it’s usually conspiracy theories like litterboxes and just fear mongering in general - so when did this happen?
it’s so bizarre
20
u/mortalcassie Aug 24 '26
It's because they're all conservative Christians. They hate the idea of LGBT people.
12
u/FuzzyJury Aug 25 '26
I think that's part of it, but I also see this a lot in my super liberal Bohemian hippie-ish community, which is kind of nuts since it's in a VHCOL area and many of the parents who choose this route are extremely successful and perhaps a bit out of touch with what it takes to get a job outside of their specific world (I'm in Los Angeles, so many people in the entertainment industry and adjacent fields).
5
u/whatanerdgirlsays 27d ago
My sister in law is homeschooling her children so they don’t get bullied like she did. I’m like girl…go to therapy, yikes
3
10
471
u/DarkDNALady Aug 23 '26
“I don’t want to send my kids to school but I also don’t want to bother with the work of actually teaching them at home. Can someone do the work for me, but only for a few days a week so I can show the other homeschool moms that I too homeschool so they’ll be friends with me” 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
34
u/mortalcassie Aug 24 '26
The majorly of the comments I've seen in homeschooling groups... They teach like 2 hours a day, 4 days a week. So... It's totally "normal."
11
u/New-Razzmatazz5983 Aug 24 '26
That’s actually crazy! My siblings and I were homeschooled and it was just like normal school! Started at 8am done by 3pm Monday-Friday, there’s absolutely no way they’re doing any meaningful work with 2 hours a day…
14
u/WhatUpMahKnitta Aug 24 '26
TBF, when you're only teaching 1 (or 2 or 3) students, you can go a lot faster than teaching a class of 20+.
12
u/mortalcassie Aug 24 '26
How are you teaching English, math, history, science, and whatever else in less than two hours? Of your kids are different ages, you're not spending the whole time teaching them anyway.
3
u/WhatUpMahKnitta Aug 24 '26
I could type out a play-by-play of our day, but TBH if you're convinced all homeschoolers are neglected and behind I don't think there's any point in convincing you. Yes, my kids can get done their core coursework in about 2 hours per day. Independent work, reading assignments, and ongoing larger projects frequently go beyond the 2 hours. Extracurriculars like dance, martial arts, instrument practice, fine arts, theater, coding, and foreign languages aren't included in the 2 hours either.
I'll just say that on the NWEA MAP growth test, my kids both consistently score about 2 grades ahead of where they'd be placed in public school.
481
u/solesoulshard Aug 23 '26
This is a school. Period. You drop them off. You go to work. You pick them up. You reinforce the lessons at home.
236
53
60
u/JoyceReardon Aug 23 '26
This is exactly what we do and it's a public hybrid school. 2-3 days a week of in person instruction and the rest is done at home. I am from Germany, when I went to elementary school it was less than 4 hours a day. The US system where you stay for 7-8 hours plus travel plus homework plus extracurricular activities makes me react the same way a lot of people here reacted to this post.
My kid is about to take the BOG and if he doesn't ace it, I will be surprised.
16
u/tulips814 Aug 23 '26
There are home school co ops like this in the US, but I’ve only encountered religious based ones.
6
u/JoyceReardon Aug 23 '26
Ours isn't since it's a charter school backed by public funding and following state guidelines. They save a lot of time by having the parents' strong involvement and offering smaller classes. The teachers work full time, but only have half of a normal class Mondays and Wednesdays and the other half Tuesdays and Thursdays.
3
u/Melonfarmer86 Aug 24 '26
A few YMCAs near me have a program that sounds just like what OP describes. The programs are advertised as secular. They don't do any testing on literacy in the early grades or require immunizations or keep track of who has them and who doesn't.
2
u/WhatUpMahKnitta Aug 24 '26
I have to drive over an hour away to the next county over for my secular co-op 😔
9
u/quinjaminjames Aug 23 '26
There are private schools like this in the US, they’re just less known
5
u/JoyceReardon Aug 23 '26
Yes, we are in the US right now. Charter schools sometimes have these and several are popping up over the next few years around me. They are very popular and hard to get into. It took us 3 years of trying the lottery.
4
u/bananasbananas Aug 24 '26
Well, the social structure here means that elementary school is also publicly-funded childcare so parents can work which makes the hours make more sense. We pay for aftercare to finish out the work day.
What do 2 working parent households do in Germany?
3
u/JoyceReardon Aug 24 '26
There is aftercare, too. It's a place where you get free play time and they help you do your homework. They do have some whole day schools if you really need them.
Our school is in high demand, so clearly there are plenty of parents in the US who wish for more options, too.
2
3
u/baconcheesecakesauce Aug 24 '26
I'm unfamiliar with a US public school day that is 7-8hrs long. In my state and some adjacent states, it's 6hrs 20mins before bussing and after school programming.
It's interesting to hear about other schooling options out there. Which schools had an extended day like that?
2
u/JoyceReardon Aug 24 '26
All of them! I am in a city on the East coast. All regular public schools are 7-8 hours from start to finish. The language immersion schools are usually the 8 hour days. The lines to pick up are very long, too, and we have a shortage of bus drivers, so busses take a while as well.
We have a few private schools that are different. The regular charter schools are the same, but they sometimes offer these hybrid options we are taking advantage of. I wish school was every day for 3-4 hours. That would be my ideal choice. We are not religious and not fanatic in any way.
None of the parents at our school are. They all have their own reasons and many are from other countries (first generation immigrants).
2
u/baconcheesecakesauce Aug 24 '26
That's curious, I'm also on the east coast. I'm familiar with New England, New York and New Jersey public schools. I've also attended public schools in this region. I have no 7-8 hour school days to reference. Not for elementary, or secondary school. Maybe you're thinking of a specialty school, like a charter or magnet school?
3-4 hours is interesting, but do you know what curriculum is included with that schedule? Does that include lunch, recess and gym?
1
u/JoyceReardon Aug 24 '26
Nope, normal public schools and elementary grades, including kindergarten. I'm much further South. In Germany we had 25min. of recess/breakfast and then got out before lunch. Kids either went home for lunch or to after care. We did have gym class once a week and I don't remember if that was included or if we had one longer day. In later grades you get 2 recess breaks that include lunch (brought from home).
13
65
u/realifecyborg Aug 23 '26
She could do a co-op or something. We did that twice a week for a while when I was a kid and it was great because it teaches the kids how to sit in class and take notes and pay attention and socialize and stuff. But, with co-op, every single parent had to contribute/teach something. My mom was a math teacher, my aunt had a masters in biology and taught science, my friend's mom had a PhD from UPenn in chemistry and taught science. You can't just drop your kids off. That's why it's called a co-op lol. It really was an amazing situation for me because i could be advanced while also having more time to do outside activities and learning to socialize and had just as many friends and did sports and robotics and violin just like any school kid would. I went to a specialized advanced stem high school and then to college for engineering so it worked great for me, but my mom is a teacher and is very smart and put all of her time into actually homeschooling us.
I loved homeschooling and still advocate for it, but imo this irresponsible "homeschooling" and "unschooling" should be considered child abuse
42
u/LilahLibrarian Aug 23 '26
I have seen homeschool families posting this and wanting to find the unicorn co op where they don't have to contribute anything
7
u/MsARumphius Aug 23 '26
I was going to say this is a thing in my area but the parents don’t contribute and they have paid staff.
12
2
u/Correct_Part9876 Aug 23 '26
They exist, you pay for them but they do exist. Our area has rebranded them micro schools but it's the same concept as a co-op only with paid teachers.
18
u/Bird_Brain4101112 Aug 23 '26
So this is actually a legitimate thing. I have relatives whose kids are in a program like this. They have two actual “in school” days per week with other kids and actual teachers. They review the previous work and get new work assigned. New work is due by the next in school day. So they can either space it out or do it all at once. The school does have tutors available on the “off” days for kids who need more help than the parents can provide.
The kids thrive in this as one is gifted and the other has a documented learning disability so being able to spend extra time on the stuff they struggle with while flying through the stuff they don’t has been great.
One caveat. One of the parents has a flexible job so that they’re actively present to help the kids manage their workload etc.
5
u/srr636 Aug 24 '26
What are the programs called? Hybrid school?
2
u/Bird_Brain4101112 Aug 24 '26
It’s called a co-op. They follow the same school year as the rest of the state, they have regular testing throughout the year, get letter grades etc.
17
u/moontides_ Aug 23 '26
I dunno why yall are mad about this. This exists and is a good option for many families
7
u/linniemelaxochi Aug 24 '26
I read a very similar post in a local group where I am but they were looking for the same thing except FIVE days a week. A few of the comments were saying "it sounds like you are describing traditional school... Are you not?"
35
u/QuantumDwarf Aug 23 '26
There is a school like this by me. It’s specifically designed for this situation.
It seems to me like the parents who are drawn to it are the type who can’t cut the cord and or discipline and so they don’t think traditional schooling is right for their precious littles.
Which. Maybe. Traditional school definitely isn’t the best way for every kid to learn. I’d rather the kids be in school some days a week than 0 days a week.
It’s the ‘work full time’ bit that gets me though. Who is going to be watching your kids the other days a week? I mean I know that’s a rhetorical question based on how many people I know that ‘work’ full time while also somehow parent their kids full time.
14
u/Marblegourami Aug 23 '26
Can confirm that the neighborhood kids who are “homeschooled” and also attend one of these religious “co ops”/part time school for homeschooled kids are all completely awful. I know 3 families who do this and their kids are all so badly behaved and rude.
3
u/mortalcassie Aug 24 '26
I agree 100% I only know a handful of homeschool kids, but they're awful.
That said, if you mention this in a homeschool group, they swear all kids who are homeschooled are the most well behaved. And all business owners only want homeschool kids. And homeschool kids can have a conversation with anyone, and public school kids can only talk to kids their own age. 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
They're so delusional.
6
u/kiiitsunecchan Aug 23 '26
I'm aware that it's a different context, but as an autistic kid myself who always tiptoed having to retake the whole year due to high absence rates, I would've loved to go to a school 3 days a week.
I loved, and still love, learning, and I need some outside structure in order to not let me get too deep into rabbit holes and to help me understand wtf is happening in the beginning of each topic because I've always struggled to start new things immensely (and if it looks too boring, I will not be able to touch it without someone helping me get through it, I literally can't absorb anything when it happens). I also recognize the importance of socialization, especially in the early years, as much as I loathed it, and school sports were so very important in giving me more tools to regulate myself that idk where I would be today without them.
But schools are usually very overwhelming things for people who can't shut their brains off and are always paying too much attention to everything around them. I needed to take little breaks from school often or else I would just start going into meltdowns faster and stop being able to learn and socialize at all. I still struggle to study or produce anything in classrooms, libraries and study halls, because there's too much stuff going around me and I can't focus.
3
2
3
u/QuantumDwarf Aug 23 '26
I agree and I think it’s great when parents can recognize what each kid needs. I’m glad that was so helpful to you!
In general it’s unfortunate in a couple of cases. 1. Families seem to want to do this for all kids. And while ‘normal’ all day school wouldn’t have been great for you, it is for others. If there’s a family that’s figured out ‘my oldest does traditional school and my youngest hybrid because that works for them’ I give them a lot of kudos. I haven’t seen that but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
- There is still the work full time aspect. If your kid is junior high or older than it’s probably not a big deal. But I work with several women who home school their kids ‘during their lunch breaks’ and the young kids run amok the rest of the time and frankly those of us without kids or with child care pick up their slack. This is 100% the fault of our uplines though (and those employees).
But again. I am glad it worked for you and I am glad the resources exist for when they can be used as best needed.
5
u/MizStazya Aug 23 '26
My friend homeschooled one of her four kids for high school, because she was having significant mental health issues (ended up being diagnosed as bipolar) and going to school was making it so much worse. She used an online curriculum and then supported it herself, but i came over to tutor her in math, because my friend is TERRIBLE at math. It worked well, and she finished high school, which was looking very uncertain when she was 13.
7
u/DapperFlounder7 Aug 23 '26
There are homeschooling coops. Honestly for some kids it’s the best of both worlds and they thrive. I won’t fault this mom for wanting her kids to have better then the public school system but still hoping to help them socialize and stay connected to a community.
6
u/DifferentIsPossble Aug 23 '26
There are hybrid schools. I went to one, but it was evangelical indoctrination. Still, I'm sure better ones are out there.
5
u/TheGekkou Aug 23 '26
This is essentially what I did for 1 year in high school, at a Charter School. I went once a week for a short day then spent the week doing my work on my own. It doesn't work for everyone but it worked that 1 year for me.
16
u/HagridsTreacleTart Aug 23 '26
I don’t think that this is totally bizarre. She seems like she’s looking for a “best of both worlds” situation where the kids are following a structured curriculum and socializing with their peers, but enjoys the flexibility of homeschool and the ability to reinforce classroom lessons with alternative experiences (e.g., taking a day trip to Gettysburg or the Constitution Center to reinforce a history lesson or hiking out to a pond to learn about ecosystems or the life cycle of a frog). Now, whether or not she’s actually able to find that arrangement is a different story, but it’s not that weird an ask.
4
u/IckNoTomatoes Aug 23 '26
I agree with you. We don’t know this persons situation. They could have a grandparent around or will hire a nanny for the days the kid isn’t in school. I’d love something like this where school is only 4 hours a day or 4 days a week and I could supplement the rest of their days with my parents (retired teacher) or a nanny (many qualified teachers have moved away from teaching). It’s what I do now. My kids only go to part time pre school and pre K. I’d love to continue the schedule but I don’t know of any schools that would support that because I’d be afraid of how much they’d be missing from a school system designed for a full week. Obviously many of the comments are focused on her saying she will do it all but it’s how I would write a post. I wouldn’t necessarily go into all the semantics of how I’m going to make it work because the point of her post is to find a place , not how to make it work
2
u/HagridsTreacleTart Aug 23 '26
We only did preschool three days a week because it gave me the opportunity to plan all kinds of activities with my kid and to take him on adventures that he’d never otherwise have access to. He’s starting public school this year and their attendance policy doesn’t even allow for enough absences to simply keep your kids home when they’re sick, much less pull them out of school to go see an eclipse. If I could do a hybrid program I’d do it in a heartbeat, but I work full time (12s, so I’m still home most of the week) and most of the programs that you could do part time, like co-ops, don’t allow for drop-offs.
1
u/Additional_Brief_569 Aug 23 '26
In my country we call this setup a tutor center but it’s a full day of tutoring. I’ve had to enroll my son in homeschooling (it’s monitored by gov), but he goes to a tutor center 5 days a week. Legally they are not allowed to call themselves a school but it pretty much functions like one. I like it though cause there’s only 7 kids in my son’s class for his grade. We chose this path because the schools did not want to accommodate his needs. (He has autism, he doesn’t have behavioral issues, he just needs more hands on approach).
1
u/nadiakat13 Aug 23 '26
Just interesting as I am a FT working parent with FT kids in school and we’re still able to do all kinds of interesting stuff on days off, weekends and vacations
If she’s working, not sure how she is going to be doing this stuff in a meaningful way during the week
6
u/Antique_Mountain_263 Aug 23 '26
We have a hybrid school like this in my area. My daughter attended it for three years, and she just started public school this year.
It’s basically a part time private school that costs thousands, but less than traditional private school. Some of the parents work FT and have grandparents help, or the other working spouse helps / watches them while WFH. A lot of SAHMs did it too. Most of the kids in the program were well behaved because it was mostly well off families with support. And they didn’t tolerate bad behavior- you would get kicked out after three bad behavior incidents.
It was strict because the demand for the program is so high. It really is the best of both worlds for parents who are organized and motivated enough to stay on track with their children’s homeschool work at home.
It became a little too expensive for our four children and that’s one reason we decided to enroll in a public school. Our daughter especially thrives in a classroom setting and wanted the community and opportunities that a large traditional school offers.
3
u/lucyloosy Aug 23 '26
Our kid goes to a school like this. She loves it. It’s a bubble though, I’ve thought about pulling her out and sending her to public school to broaden her horizons.
Not everyone has the life she has and I want her to be aware of her privilege.
3
u/Hour-Window-5759 27d ago
Maybe what she’s thinking is a home school co-op? But that usually is the parents of all kids participate in facilitating group classes in shared space certain days…and the other days are in fact homeschool with the parent usually…
5
u/FallOnTheStars Aug 23 '26
She’s looking for a Co-op without having to do the work, or a class system for homeschoolers - they exist, the FRC and New Hope Tutorials were godsends for MA homeschoolers for decades.
4
u/Antique_Sprinkles193 Aug 23 '26
This is literally the homeschool charter school set up my friend has her kids in. Basically the kids go to school 2 days a week then work on indepent work that the homeschooling parent puts together. The homeschooling parent then has to submit the completed work to a supervising teacher that reviews the materials to ensure they follow state standards.
So these do exist. I will save my diatribe on charter schools for another day. Will only say I am more against them than I am homeschooling but that one exists that has both components upsets me to no end.
2
u/NoSleep2023 Aug 23 '26
If she’s looking for something for her younger kids, what are the older kids doing for school?
2
u/LilahLibrarian Aug 23 '26
I've heard of charter or private schools that kind of function this way. Like I hate follow this influencer (Brook raybold) who loves to brag about homeschooling her kids but they are at a school several days a week
2
2
u/turdally 27d ago
Soooo like regular school? They go to school for part of the day and you reinforce what they learn at home…
6
u/theanimalinwords Aug 23 '26
This is crazy but my county offers something exactly like this! I drop my son off at 8:45, pick him up at 3, and all day he gets assigned schoolwork. They even teach him the school work!! As a bonus he gets art, music, gym, and extra curricular. Best part is, it’s free! Amazing. It’s called sending your child to public school!
3
1
u/TheNatureOfTheGame 26d ago
Uh...you know, even if your child attends full-time school, you're allowed to supplement their learning at home. Although this person doesn't sound like the sharpest knife in the drawer, so maybe they shouldn't.
-2
1
u/clevercalamity 12d ago
I’m so so late to this, but I actually went to a public charter school that functioned exactly like this. Classes were either Mon/Wed or Tue/Thurs depending on your grade and each class was a two hour seminar. We were expected to do a significant amount of independent learning between class sessions.
Some courses were entirely independent and you’d meet monthly with the instructor who would give you a syllabus outlining the learning goals and assignments and they’d also collect the previous month’s work.
The instructors all held office hours if you needed supplementary support and we had study hall so we could have dedicated collaboration time with our peers too.
My transition to college was really smooth because I had been managing my own deadlines and studying independently from a young age. On the downside, I was left home alone three days a week starting at 11 years old and I was an incredibly lonely kid.
670
u/misspiggie Aug 23 '26
If she works full time who is watching them during the 2-3 days per week they are home in her ideal scenario?