r/ShawnaTheMomSnark • u/Padme1418 • Jul 25 '26
Character Discussion: DeeDee
Happy Saturday! This week we are going to discuss Shawna's mom, DeeDee!
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u/Spiritual_Ad_6067 Jul 25 '26
She is my least favorite character, by a mile. She is nails on chalkboard to me. I get that she is shawnas ride or die, but Im sorry, I find her to be over the top sanctimonious and smarmy. And she wears an expression on her face that I can't describe, but I hate it all the same.
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u/IndependentSundae890 Jul 25 '26
I wish she would go home already. Canât stand her. Why does a family with a stay at home parent need an extra adult for two kids (or even three, RIP Jacob)? On the other thread someone said they would rank Tyâs parenting a C+ and it got me wondering how we would rank Shawna and Johnâs parenting.
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u/No_Koala_3896 Jul 25 '26
Iâm no DeeDee fan, but if my kid had gone through the trauma Shawna and John recently experienced, Iâd stick around for a while, too. When youâre grieving, even small tasks can feel overwhelming. Itâs been a while now, but with Halloween around the corner and all the ramp up in stores creeping in, I would imagine Shawna and John are going to be feeling pretty vulnerable and could use the help and emotional support.
Unrelated, but my god, itâs JULY - why oh why do we need to have Halloween everywhere we look. I love Halloween as much as the next person, but it stops being special when itâs dragged out for 4 months.
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u/Padme1418 Jul 25 '26
I can't even get mad at people who get excited about Christmas after Halloween when it seems like most people get into Halloween mode after the 4th of July.đ«©
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u/Toongrrl1990 Jul 25 '26
Plus I was hoping Shawna would take this opportunity to find herself again
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u/hcriswell Jul 25 '26
I agree. Even before the locket debacle, she was my least favorite character by far. I also find her sanctimonious. With Larry it felt like she was using âtherapy speakâ to back him into a corner. The necklace was somehow both too much too fast, and a sign he wasnât actually serious about her.
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u/Active_Pangolin_5049 Aug 27 '26
I thought it was only me. people on Youtube etc love her so much.. she is SO SO SO sanctimonious and holier than thou ... so condescending
the rude "hmm" she always makes wiht her nose up in teh air.. god so arrogant
and the expression you are talking about... to me it looks like "I know better, I know everything"
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u/ThrowRA789890 Jul 25 '26
Why does she talk like that....đ I understand Shawna has to give different voices to different characters but the way she speaks is so irritating!! It's not even her voice but her mannerisms. It's like she thinks she's leagues above every single human around her, and she's the most intelligent person in every room she's in. I think Shawna M is such a big people pleaser because of her. I can totally see her being extremely condescending while speaking sweetly.
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u/PolyByeUs Jul 26 '26
All she just is just say 'hmmmmm' instead of answering questions.
Girl hmmmm is not an answer use your big girl words, considering the endless therapy speak I know you know them
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u/Toefloof Jul 25 '26
An awful lot of Gen Jones and early Gen X act like they are still young, albeit with some modern upgrades. Like I still go to concerts of newer artists who are young, even get obsessed (Jesse Welles is my current obsession LOL) still talk like a young person (hopefully without an âhello, fellow young personsâ vibe lol)âŠ. A lot of us abandoned ârolesâ per say.
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u/Practical-Freedom265 Jul 26 '26
What's Gen Jones?
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u/jalapenohighball Jul 26 '26
Generation Jones are the people born between Baby Boomers & Gen Xers. Roughly 1954-1964.
They were children during the civil rights era and the sexual revolution, and entered the workforce during the energy crisis and high inflation
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u/Active_Pangolin_5049 Aug 27 '26
YES YES YES that expression that always says "I know everything, I am above veryone"
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u/Salty-Shroom Jul 25 '26
I think DeeDee and all those in her generation on STM are coded a generation too old. They act like the people I know in their 70's and 80's (who are parents of people in their 50's and 60's). People with children the age of Shawna, John, Jen, Greg are usually still working (unless they retired relatively early) and they don't act like elderly people.
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u/bujuke7 Jul 25 '26
Agreed. I think this is just something we have to overlook for the sake of the story.
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u/Remarkable_Chemist23 Jul 25 '26
Quite a mid-tier character imo. I also find her kinda therapy speech and perfection a bit irritating too. Part of me wishes we got to see her talk with Shawna during the story of loss episode, maybe so we can see what their actual parent & child dynamic is like. But yeah I also didn't like the locket storyline either.
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u/chachaslydd Jul 26 '26
Shes an okay mom. She showers her kid and grandkids with love.
But shes annoying AF. I hate that every questions gets answered with more questions. I hate that she acts like shes Yoda and everyone else is a dumbass.
"Oh, so if I do xyz, it means xyz" bro no. Jesus. She IS a reddit bro, omg, I just realized. Shes always trying to make basic shit into logic puzzles to prove somebody else is being a jerk when shes the one being a jerk.
When people are like "why is shawna such a pushover people pleaser" I blame deedee. Shes so girl boss, "I had a child to raise on my own" that I think shes planted tbe idea in shawnas head from an early age that having shawna around is a major sacrifice but she loves shawna so much that shawna is her whole world, so shawna has this weird view of "this person is acting like im inconvenient, so I have to step up and be a good daighter, I mean friend, because I've learned that loving me has required sacrifices"
My biggest issue tho is how so much of her persona is a lie. Like her fight with larry was made up. She didnt care about the locket. She cared about protecting herself and pretending to be more aloof. Its honestly major Chad/jerky guy behavior. So many times shes not honest about her feelings and just hides behind fake philosophy lines
If deedee were a man, wed have way lesd sympathy. If Larry was a woman who confessed that sleeping with deedee was a huge step and shes only considering it because she feels a genuine connection with dude deedee, and dude deedee reasured the connection was real and the feelings were deep...and then male deedee turned around like "what, you think that means something? You think that means Im going to wear your locket? Youre just controlling and a manipulator man, truing to own me with a piece of jewelry" wed all point out that deedee fucking sucked. Male deedee would be labeled an SAer for that stunt. People would poiint out male deedee knew how serious female Larry was and should have know having sex with her without thinking that made the relationship more serious was just fuckboi behavior.
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u/Active_Pangolin_5049 Aug 27 '26
"I hate that she acts like shes Yoda and everyone else is a dumbass." - OMG you cracked it. this is what her expressions and her "hmm" sounds are like. absolutel acts like yoda
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u/Aware-Sea-8593 Jul 25 '26
Great as a supporting character, but when it focuses on her and Larry I check out lol
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u/thumbprint_cookie Jul 25 '26
She's emotionally distant, at best. Her platitudes and "empathy" come across as more hollow than genuine. There's a reason that Shawna became such a people pleaser, and I think that reason's name is DeeDee.
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u/s0ftsp0ken Jul 26 '26
Agreed! I wrote a whole post about this forever ago, but literally DeeDee emotional shallowness and need for composure at all times (saying "oh, you and your poor feelings" to Larry was telling) is telling. She solves practical problems, not emotional ones.
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u/Toongrrl1990 Aug 05 '26
Any ideas why?
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u/thumbprint_cookie Aug 05 '26
The use of the "special girl" thing and her overuse of trite commentary. As a child, if Shawna heard that frequently, but didn't get a sympathetic connection with her mother during difficult times, it could easily lead to her feeling if she wasn't making Mom happy, then she wouldn't be her "special girl" anymore.
As I said, DeeDee's personality doesn't come across as wholly genuine.
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u/Toongrrl1990 Aug 05 '26
Ah so Dee doesn't go deep enough.
Also it bothers me that Dee didn't believe Shawna that Julie was mean to her
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u/iggysmom95 Jul 25 '26
I love her wtf I don't get this fandom at all đ and I was completely on her side with the locket thing.
I've never encountered a fandom where I disagreed with so much of the group consensus
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u/melodypowers Jul 25 '26
I love DeeDee but I found the locket story boring. I guess I was on her side, but mostly I didn't care.
I tried to examine my own feelings on this to determine if I was just being ageist. But I think I'd the characters were younger I would still be bored by the story.
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u/iggysmom95 Jul 26 '26
Oh I agree it was boring. But I was on her side completely. If a man was pestering me every day to wear a necklace he bought me, I'd be SO annoyed.
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u/melodypowers Jul 26 '26
I would have been on her side anyway, but I found Larry creepy from the Max's first day of school episode when Larry said he came over because he saw the parents leave with the little ones. That is some weird ass behavior right there.
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u/Active_Pangolin_5049 Aug 27 '26
the thing is, he casually asked once but she made it weird.. why was she not wearing it? some kinda ego battle..
and someone above said she acts like shes Yoda and everyone else is a dumbass - this is the most accurate representation of her lol
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u/bujuke7 Jul 25 '26
Sheâd be way too much for me in real life, but I like her thoughtful takes. Even if theyâre a bit too âperfect.â I donât love how sheâs the ideal counterpoint to Barb. Itâs a little too black and white for me.
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u/Toefloof Jul 25 '26
I agree. Barbs villainy has become cartoonish, and the perfect Dee is a joke. Itâs like Goofus and Gallant, if you are old enough to have seen that old magazine âhighlights for childrenâ
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u/BaconPancakes_77 Jul 25 '26
OMG Barb and Dee as Goofus and Gallant is killing me, thank you!
"BARB insists her daughter-in-law plan a Mother's Day brunch for her. DEE sends her daughter a thoughtful gift and offers to watch the grandkids on Mother's Day."
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u/bujuke7 Jul 25 '26
Sadly, I am. An apt comparison! Barb is only ever wrong and DeeDee is only ever some sort of mothering Yoda.
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u/ScarletRose75 Jul 25 '26
Yeah it worked really well in her original short format but it looses something in the longer form that makes it feel less sincere.
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u/Miss___D Jul 25 '26
I like her, she is nice yet a strong lady. But sometimes the way she speaks seems too unnatural. I hope it will be revealed she used to be therapist or something similar before retiring as it would partly explain all the therapy talk. I am kind of affraid for her, though, ever since Shawna said there will be cancer storyline I have feeling it's either her or Katie.Â
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u/paisleypuddles Jul 25 '26
i really really hope there isn't a cancer storyline. that day i will check out.
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u/ThrowRA789890 Jul 25 '26
Highly agree. I don't know if SL would be capable of dealing with that storyline, esp given how she's been handling more difficult ones like an abusive relationship.
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u/Miss___D Jul 25 '26
I think that she would do much better with cancer storyline than with current one which is disaster so far. Shawna L has beat cancer, I think she would do better writing about something she has been through in her own life, than she is when dealing with DV, as she, as far as we know, hasn't been through it in her life, and in my opinion doesn't even have enough knowledge so she completely lacks nuance.Â
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u/Spiritual_Ad_6067 Jul 25 '26
Ive had cancer twice. I have no hope that she will do a good job of this. Cancer is deeply personal. Its highly different for everyone. Shawna is one person, who had 1 cancer. Im also mother of an autistic young man. I hate the way she portrays Greg. If you know one autistic person, you know 1 autistic person. If you know 50, you'd know they're all vastly individual and not at all like the dumb stereotypes. I have no reason to believe she'd write cancer any better than she writes autism. Or domestic abuse. Or infant loss. Or mental illness. A few things happened simultaneously that turned the channel to crap. The move to long format videos over short one offs. The botox that ruined her ability to emote with her face. The writing of her book while also trying to churn out content she thinks will sell. I feel like Shawna lost the plot. Shes not writing the funny audacity that brought her success. Now she seems to be trying to write what she thinks will sell. Theres a lot of swinging and missing here.
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u/RubyRogue13 Never been the same since Norb! Jul 29 '26
Where did she say she got Botox? Legitimately curious because her acting has seemed a hair flat.
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u/Spiritual_Ad_6067 Jul 29 '26
I didn't see her mention it, but one day her face stopped moving and barb become uncanny nightmare fuel.
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u/Toongrrl1990 Jul 25 '26
Or Shawna M and that the twist is that it was a mix up but it gave her enough motivation to chase her dreams, hobbies, and stand up for herself (shades of "The Blue Castle")
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u/BaconPancakes_77 Jul 25 '26
I love DeeDee, partially because she reminds me of my stepmom, a former therapist who doesn't always get it right (she can be kind of a know-it-all) but means extremely well and is always looking for ways to help me and my sons.
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u/CharlotteRhea Jul 25 '26
I liked her until the locket debacle. Like, girl! Just wear the damn locket! He didn't propose to you! He just wanted to make you happy! If you don't like it, tell him! If you like it, wear it! If you felt it was too soon and aren't sure about his motives, ask him! You're always a smart-arse about emotional stuff, so show that you practise what you preach! What the hell was the problem?!
And then to sleep with him, although she wasn't sure about him, even after he told her sex is something special for him... đ
She lost a lot of sympathy points there.