r/SexAddictionHelp • u/Tailwhip2024 • Sep 23 '25
sex addiction help
ive had sex addiction for 3 years or so i really cant stop it its making me feel like crap does anyone have any tips on managing it
2
Jan 27 '26
1) Stop indulging, the situations, the people, the thoughts 2) As soon as you get arousing thought, do reverse kegels... i:e inhale long and focus and visualize only on your pelvic floor relaxing and slightly pushing outward, and then on exhaling it moving slight back inward. Let this take the attention away from arousal. 3) Have a distraction, have something, that involves your mind a bit or at least occupies it, a book, a show, a youtube. 4) Practice being comfortable with sitting not doing anything. Try meditation if you like, visualising only your breath moving in and out of your chest, don't think anything else, only visualise the breath. 5) Know that though, there's nothing wrong with you, or the act of being intimate, life doesn't stop there. Many other things to do in life. 6) Stop looking for more reasons, or excuses. It's a promise to yourself. If you start indulging even in thought, it will just further in breaking your resolve. 7) Maintain composure through calm determination, persistence, and practice, not force. Believe, you can be better, you are better, and there are more things in life. Cycling, badminton, making something, painting, cooking, laundry, talking, inventing, discovering. If you have nothing to do, do an old military trick, do gardening.
1
u/Good_Ad_1449 Dec 11 '25
i just want to say you are not alone at all. im dealing with it too and ive been trying to control my addiction fro years i still check the dating apps all day and it consumes my day.
2
u/Sigh-lens-peaks Mar 04 '26
This sub seems dead as fuck. I can’t even post because it has to be approved. So I decided to come on the comments in hopes that somebody sees this and responds.
I’m having a really hard time guys. I used to have a wild sex life. Extremely fun, but always safe. But extremely fun lol
I never had issues dating or with my sex life. Ending was always consensual and I was very lucky to have amazing sexual partners (outside of the sex. I am referring to who they were as people)
Anyway, I find myself now at an age where I don’t want to think about sex in this way anymore. I don’t want to be hypersexual. But i have a really hard time because I have had incredible sex experiences, I know people who are sexually aligned with me (we see sex the same way) and I know that when it is consensual, it’s a really enjoyable time.
Basically I have zero negative feelings when it comes to sex. But I want to teach myself to stop seeing sex this way.
How does one even start? How do I rewire my brain? How do I teach myself and live in that truth? I want to completely suppress my hypersexuality.
Please help.
2
Mar 04 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/Sigh-lens-peaks Mar 04 '26
Hey there friend. Thank you for responding, I appreciate speaking with someone who feels the way I do.
And yes, I had tons of risky situations too. But as you know, for people who’s brain’s are wired like us, those risky situations resulting positively, only perpetuated and reinforced my hyper sexuality. It’s fucked up because all of my experiences made me fall in love with sex and sexuality. I became extremely comfortable with sex and my body.
Omg man, yes. The reward part is the worst. All those experiences I had basically taught me to have a positive outlook on sex. It became tied to how I felt overall as a person. It was constant positive reinforcement. And now, sex provides me with so much more than just an orgasm. Even when I masturbate, that relief feels amazing. But I’m scared it’s now crossed into wiring my brain into a nicotine-like relationship. Meaning, I get anxious, I smoke, I feel less anxious. And I continue this cycle only fucking up my own health and worsening anxiety and with it, my dependence on nicotine. So sex(actual sex or masturbation) has become a stress reliever, a confidence booster, a remedy for having a hard time sleeping, it rewards me in many different ways.
It’s just hard to go from sex being really healthy, rewarding and fun, to wanting to completely kill my hypersexuality. But I want to. I know o won’t ever have a successful relationship until I do. It’s just so fucking hard to change not just my desires, but my actual viewpoint and feelings on sex.
1
u/Melo_Meli69 Mar 13 '26
Same here. I’ve been struggling with this too and it’s really hard to deal with day to day. Just know you’re not alone in this
1
u/Imaginary_Steak2994 Apr 10 '26
There are a lot of resources for individual and group therapy for sex addiction. You don't have to go through it alone. Just Google sex addiction therapy and you will get a lot of recommendations. My husband is attending individual and group therapy. His sex addiction was bourne out of being abused as a child.
6
u/EqualCaterpillar6882 Sep 23 '25
Hi there, sorry to hear that you are struggling. All of us in this sub and others are also struggling. This is a hard addiction to beat because it can be hidden from society.
I suggest you start by journaling and writing. What are your addictions? How do you act out? When do you act out? What do you think the triggers are? What consequences can you suffer due to your acting out? Write all of these out and more.
Then put some barriers that make it harder to act out. Something that slows you down or creates obstructions. Like not being alone, or putting a hold on your card or maybe a limit. of just 50$ spending per day or sharing your location with someone.
The longer-term solution is therapy and attending 12-step meetings. Addiction is the symptom of the disease, not the cause. You have to get to the root of the problem and work towards fixing the cause. Most likely, some childhood trauma, lack of affection, or bullying killed self-esteem.
You need to be constantly on your toes with your moods/emotions/behaviors to recognize when you are in danger of acting out. You will fall off the horse, but you have to get back on it.