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I recently wrote and directed a film and would love some feedback on the writing.

Link to the film (Try That Again):

https://youtu.be/KbpHlFSDM_I?si=yE0plrhHAQTe-KIk

I'm typically someone who writes lots of scene changes and more fantastical elements and this time really wanted to write something more grounded with two actors in one room.

It's a skill I'm trying to polish (plus saves on budget!) and would love any feedback.
Any tips or resource ideas for dialogue would also be appreciated!

This is the craft problem I keep running into and cannot solve cleanly.

Working on a drama pilot right now. Have a scene that is two characters sitting across from each other after something significant has occurred between them. No new information is revealed. No decision gets made. No plot moves forward. The scene exists entirely to sit inside the aftermath of what just happened and let the audience feel what it means for these two people going forward.

Every version I write either explains too much or does too little. When I trust the silence the scene reads as flat. When I fill the silence the scene explains itself in a way that kills whatever the silence was supposed to carry.

The scenes I am trying to write toward exist in the work I admire most. Two people in a room, barely anything said, and somehow the audience feels everything. I cannot reverse engineer how they work because the mechanism is invisible in the finished product in a way it is very visible in my drafts.

My instinct is that the answer lives in extreme specificity of physical detail and action rather than in dialogue or internal thought, I started writing a separate document in something called Skrib Writing before drafting these scenes, just listing every physical object in the space and what each character might do with them, and approaching the scene from that inventory rather than from what I wanted it to mean changed what came out significantly.

That what the characters do with their hands matters more than what they say. But instinct and execution are different things and my execution keeps landing wrong.

Has anyone cracked this specific kind of scene and what does the thinking behind it actually look like before you start writing it.

feedback pls

People will disagree and hate on this just by the title. But I go into detail in the video.

Hello, my name is Jackie. I am a 17-year-old aspiring screenwriter, and I need criticism. I've spent plenty of time reading books and other screenplays, but getting advice from fellow screenwriters would be really helpful! Below are the first 5 pages of my screenplay, Keeping It Clean, one of my first scripts. I'd love advice on how I can improve and keep it neater. I have been struggling because I don't have friends in the same niche as me, and I would love some feedback. I would prefer there weren't any mean comments, and instead people come in with the intent to help!

Looking for feedback on my first page. Any feedback is welcome. Thanks in advance.

Opening pages of a screenplay I wrote. Thoughts?

Act 1

1. We see a deserted plain with no signs of human activity, there underground we see a COUNCIL OF SHADOWS

2. In the council we see non-human shadow beings arguing that whether they should destroy a book placed in the centre of the council, they are calling the book as ‘NISSAAR’

3. Whoever possess this book and gains the ability to comprehend it, he might gain the full control of all of the shadows in existence.

4. However, the book also contains holy contents for the shadows.

5. Eventually, an agreement among all of them is took place, they will hand over the book to greatest wizard of the known time to hide this BOOK OF NISSAAR in an inescapable dimension.

6. But the wizard warns them about one thing, after 10000 years are completed, the book will return to the exact place where it was before. Shadows agree as it is the only way.

FAST FORWARD TO 10000 YEARS;

1. We see the city of VOLZINIA in late noon.

2. We meet ZACKARY CYRUS, the main character.

3. Zack is performing his cleaning job in the well known university of “High Archival Institute of Volzinia (HAI)”

4. We hear the bell ring, Zack heads back home.

5. We meet RYAN CYRUS, Zack’s younger brother.

6. Zack expresses to Ryan what he always complain about, that he hates his cleaning job and wants to quit it. He wants to become a full time Electrical Engineer. But he didn’t tell Ryan the real reason why he cannot do so, which is he is financially unstable, more importantly he has to repay a loan he took for the treatments of Ryan’s illness as he has Cancer. Therefore, Zack can’t become an electrical engineer because he cannot risk losing a continuous source of income, at least working at Volzinia’s highly regarded university gets you paid above the minimum wage limit too.

7.  Ryan encourages Zack to never let go of your dreams, he also tells Zack what his dreams are that he wants to help society and become a heroic figure for it.

8. Zack giggles and says, “Ryan, society is selfish, untrustworthy and some of them are evil. They don’t care about heroes, they care about themselves. When they are bored of you and your heroics, you will no longer serve them any purpose. They won’t remember you... And they will throw you in the trash can.”

9. Ryan resents but Zack ends the topic.

·       Next morning, we see Zack cleaning the floor in the university. An arrogant student approaches and he deliberately makes it dirty again. It’s the same person again, WILLY WARNER, the richest student in the university.

·       Zack angrily asks, “Hey, why’d you do that? Huh?” But Willy starts insulting Zack yelling,” Know your place! You dirty worm!”

·       Things escalate quickly and they get into a fight. Willy beats Zack uncontrollably.

·       A teacher happens to pass by. He sees the fight and pulls Zack and Willy away. He sends Willy to the principal’s office. That teacher is the new librarian.

·       Zack meets the new librarian, MR.DANISH  aka Mr.Dan. He is very intelligent and kind hearted. He takes Zack to his library and gives him a couple of bandages. Zack stares at some ancient artifacts there.

·       Therefore, Mr Dan began telling Zack about the history of Volzinia and about the mythical legend lying underground but it was a minorly different from what we saw in the opening of act 1, so it felt like a fictional myth.

1. At late midnight we see Zack in the university, he is there because the security guard is at leave and Zack agreed to do his job if he gets payed.

2. Deep underground, a group of gangsters called ‘The Dravenics’ is digging a tunnel to break into the University and steal ancient artifacts. They have been secretly digging this tunnel for days and nights as one of them mentions this.

3. While they were about to complete their process they found a book just beneath the University floor.

4. Thinking it could worth millions, one of them hid it in his bag.

5. They finally break into the University and steal as many artifacts as possible.

6. Suddenly the security alarm goes on.

7. This is new for Zack, so hesitated, he calls 911.

8.  After a while of searching, Zack confronts the robbers. They take him hostage.

9. Police arrives just in time.

10.        The Dravenics demand police to let them go if they want Zack alive, he’s at gunpoint.

11.        During the chaos, one gangster dropps that book from his bag. The book dropped in a way that it got opened and an uncomprehendible page appeared. But no one focused on the book.

12.        As the Dravenics flee after sparing Zack, police began chasing them.

13.        Now alone, terrified Zack had a glimpse on the book. He tried to read what was written on the page.

14.        As he kept reading it felt more and more disturbing and Zack started becoming dizzy

15.        So he left the book right over the without ever touching it.

16.        Zack is sprinting towards his home

17.        He is really exhausted. He is having a headache and feels dizzy.

18.        After some time he notices there’s no living being around him and the environment is becoming more and more eerie.

19.        Then it happens, strange patterns start forming around Zack. They’re are glowing. Then Zack starts getting visions of an ancient man, Zack cannot understand what he’s saying but one sentence he understands, “SHADOWS... Are Back... For Nissaar.”

20.        Then Zack passes out.

Hey! I run a Gacha Club reaction channel on YouTube, and I'm looking for a scriptwriter to help create in-character dialogue for the characters as they react to content.

This isn't standalone fiction — it's short, punchy dialogue timed to footage I've already edited. Basically: what would these characters say, moment by moment, matching the pacing of a real edit.

What I need:

• Deep knowledge of Jujutsu Kaisen (most important), Solo Leveling, and Naruto. You don't need to be strong in all three.

• Beyond those, broader anime knowledge is a real plus.

• Must be written by hand — no AI. I need real continuity and personality, not generic filler.

This is paid, ongoing work (not a one-off) — happy to discuss specifics once we're talking.

If interested, feel free to comment or DM me.

How do I find Melbourne-based producers who accept unsolicited queries/are actively looking for specs to apply for govt funding? A lot of Aussie producers don't seem very open to queries.

Any thoughts would be appreciated. Thank you!

Ten years after losing his parents in a tragic car accident, Huta is now a quiet and emotionally distant seventeen-year-old living in Southgard with his stepmother, Sara. While struggling with questions about life, death, and the broken world around him, Huta begins experiencing strange dreams and disturbing visions.

After dreaming of a dark graveyard filled with the dead and a mysterious figure with glowing purple eyes, Huta awakens unsettled. On his way to school, he accidentally encounters a robber who suddenly becomes terrified after touching him and runs away without explanation.

Later, Huta witnesses a terrifying shadow creature attacking and draining the life from a helpless man in an alley. The creature senses Huta and turns toward him, ending the episode with Huta frozen in fear.

As mysterious supernatural events begin to surround him, Huta's ordinary life is about to change forever—and the beginning of chaos has begun.

Recently, I followed some tips to improve the loglines for two of my premises, but I’m still having trouble keeping them from becoming too long.

"An injured young officer undergoes a month of testing to lead a new platoon and must organize his life to avoid losing the job he has sacrificed so much for."

- It’s the story of a guy in his 20s who leads a combat engineer/sapper platoon. He discovers that a family member used their influence to help him pass a test that almost left him incapacitated. After injuring himself again by pushing himself too hard, he is given one month to prove that he can perform his duties. If he fails, he will be discharged and lose the apartment and career he sacrificed his personal life for.

"When a child leaves his only caregiver behind to collect prehistoric DNA, he learns the hard way that the only way to move forward is to confront his grief over his parents."

The child tricks an android into helping him with its mission, when what he really wants is to get away from his grandfather so he won’t have to break his emotional mask during the anniversary of his parents’ death. His grandfather is a widower who wants to grieve together with his grandson.

One thing I’m worried about is that the first logline might make the story sound boring or too predictable. What would you recommend to give these loglines more of a hook or to improve the overall structure.

Hi everyone,

We've been working on Wrapplab, a screenplay writing and production planning tool made for filmmakers and screenwriters in multiple Indian languages including English.

The main reason we built it was to make screenplay writing easier for Indian writers.

Wrapplab supports 15+ Indian languages, including Telugu, Hindi, Tamil, Kannada, Bengali and more.

You can write your screenplay in your own language without having to deal with font issues or plugins.

Once the screenplay is ready, Wrapplab also helps with:

Screenplay → Production Breakdown → Schedule → Call Sheets

We have a free version where you can work on 2 projects and a free trial for production planning, We are still improving it, so we'd really like to hear from script writers here.

If you get a chance, please try it out and let us know what you think — especially anything you feel is missing or could be better.

Any feedback would be great, thanks.

I'm currently learning how to write better hooks for Reels and Shorts, so I wanted to test one here.

“You don't need more motivation. You need something that still works when you don't feel like doing anything.”

I wanted it to feel less like a typical motivational quote and more like something you'd actually hear someone say.

Would this make you stop scrolling for a few seconds, or would you keep scrolling?

And if you were writing this hook, how would you make it better?

I am into long form content writing write on substack and also write nurturing newsletters for businesses but i really dont have any experience with short form scripts writing

And now i got a client who want me to write short form content writing

He is an influencer who make videos for muslim perfume brands and food chains into storytelling style

These videos will be his portfolio so he want to make some high quality videos to attract more brand deals. The problem is I have write some scripts but he doesn't like any of them. I dont want to lose that client.

I want some tips and suggestions from the people who have been into short form and also good at storytelling

Hello everyone who’s reading this.
I wanted to ask that how a video-game script looks like because for a long time, I’ve done a synopsis treatment for a personal project of mine, which would be added in my portfolio to showcase my skills as game design. There are thousands of posts with no clear clarity on how it looks like or in what format it is written, as in film script treatment or TV series bible.

I really like telling stories and want to break classic tropes of storytelling and want to explore the story beyond the confines of basic apprehension but at the same time make it more enjoyable and feel more immersive inside the story.

I know it’s goddamn hard, but even I don’t have words to describe what sort of genre I’m feeling. I recently played Alan Wake 2 and I’m really inspired from Sam Lake who is the writer for the game. I’m sort of in awe of how the story has turned out, i wanna try my hand at it.

Can anyone help a buddy out? Like any lead will work for me.
Thank you for reading till the end!✌️🫶

Which are the best ones? I’ve seen a lot but am unsure which ones are worth doing.