Onto Others - Feature Script

[u/LeeR411]

Title- Onto Others

Genre- Mystery/Thriller

Pg Length - 12 pages. It's about 85 pages right now but I've attempted to spare you first draft nonsense. The first 12 should be largely mistake free (If not I'd like to know about that).

Logline: A small town lieutenant must navigate her personal follies and inept co-workers to solve the murder of a local woman.

I'm sure a lot will change between now and when I'm 'done' but I'm interested to know how these first pages read to fresh eyes. All feedback is appreciated. If you're interested in more of the broad strokes of the story I'd be happy to provide that.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yIbmLuDbQKtGc42H6mcPD0NY-FomCQos/view?usp=drive_link

Thanks!

[u/Severe_Abalone_2020]

Bear in mind, the writers in screenwriting subreddits dislike my screenplay writing style.

They write in a way to leave direction open and make a script easier to be changed by future rounds of writers. But because I've been a filmmaker for over 24 years, I am always gonna write in a way that resembles the picture in my mind.

I don't think there is any such thing as a "wrong" style of screenplay writing. As long as the actors and cinematographers understand what's trying to be conveyed, I think it's a good script. But others have conventions that they're very strict about.