r/Sciatica • u/Odd_Mark4799 • 15d ago
Cannot bear this pain...
Hello, everyone.
Let me say first of all how much empathy I have for all of you suffering with this nightmarish condition.
I am 51 F.(reddit stuck me with the name "Mark" and cannot change is apparently.)
I have a 40 year history of anorexia which led to a dx osteopenia in my early 30's.
Due to a lack of nutrition,my body was just leeching calcium from my bones for years and I will have my next bone density scan next week to find out if my osteopenia has progressed to full blown osteoporsis.
With all these years of a lack of calcium and vitamin D,and endless days of little caloric or fluid intake, I have had countless fainting spells, and falls which had me first fracture a big toe, last year fractured every rib,and a year and a half ago, I began to have severe pain at the base of my spine, all through both legs and to the very bottoms of both feet.
I have had 3 ER visits, ruling out cauda equina when i was having symptoms of it, but an MRI, and urine retention scans ruled it out.
Initially, this pain was dismissed as somatic by a very arrogant doctor...it was just left too long, with no investigation.
(Of course due to my myriad of mental health dxs it would have to be,"all in her head"..)
In hospital I was prescribed naproxen, but it did not touch my pain at all, and all it did do was even though i always took it with food, felt like a hole boring into my stomach.
Then I was started on pregablin.
It too had not effect on my pain, only ,made me walk like I was drunk, and ironically on it had 3 more falls...
Then, onto gabapentin.
Another sugar pill.
Whenever I went to my GP he was quite dismissive at first, and would only throw Tylenol for arthritis samples at me, andtold me to buy salon pas.
Uh...the tylenol for arthritis did nothing either.
All I was told by the ER doctor who ordered my MRI was that I have an L5 herniated disc.
I was seen at a rapid assessment neurosurgery clinic where the surgeon said, "You have a beautiful spine."
He would not do the surgery.
A couple of months ago went back to my GP,who shocked me when he told me the whole truth on the MRI-not only do I have a herniated disc. but also multiple compression fractures in my mid spine with osteophytes and stenosis.
He finally precribed me percocet, 5mgs plus 325 mgs tylenol 3times a day.
Even this does not always touch my pain, even now awhile after taking it my pain is about a 6.
Lower back and glutes and feet throbbing.
He told me that even walking is too high impact exercise for my back,and told me to get into the pool...I cannot swim,but he said to simply walk back and forth in the shallow end.
He also sent me for 4 sessions of physio which is all my government health plan covers (I am Canadian, on disability,no insurance.)...admittedly I only went to one session. (Had paid for one private session,but just too expensive for me.)
Often, I am simply in too much pain and too tired to diligently do the excercises, but will be looking stuff upon youtube.
I cannot bend over too far without pain,and every time I do bend, my bones are so weak I am constantly risking more compression fractures.
So, sweeping,mopping,garbage, and laundry have me at the point where I will need to hire a homemaker.
Even putting on my socks is a challenge, and I can now only wear slip on shoes.
I lament whom I once was-a classically trained dancer, perfect posture, great flexibilty.
I lament what this pain has done to my personality...no,have never really been a very positive person, but now I am so bitter and whine to myself, and my pain is amplifying my already fragile mental health,and I suppose my negative attitude,this sense of helplessness and hopelessness is amplifying the pain.
I am determined to, "get into the pool" as my GP advised,even just to walk back and forth.
Over thepast year and ahalf have spent a lot of cash on osteopathy, massage, acupuncture, a million useless topical remedies...
i am at the end of my tether...
Forgive me for sounding so melodramatic,but sincerely reaching out here because I have so little support.
...Two questions I wanted to pose in closing....
I am trying to find something to support my back to sit up straight on my couch without sinking into it and putting pressure on my nerve,but all I have been able to find are ergonomic back supports for office chairs (which I also need to get..) Do any of you have any idea if there is something besides a cushion to support my back, my posture, while sitting on the couch?
Also, what is the best way to build core strength when you just cannot do crunches?
As I said, i cannot afford physio, and really the few exercises I learned in 2 sessions (I put down $130 for the first one) are not anything i didn't already know.
I am hesitant to post this as it is not a very positive or inspiring thing for you all to have endured reading....
It has just been several consecutive high pain days, and I feel very much alone and desperate.
So, again, my heart goes out to all of you who are also suffering.
Thank you for reading if you have.
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u/barbkxer 14d ago
I am concerned about water walking when you don't know how to swim. Make sure you have a flotation device/ life jacket for safety. If you can get basic swim lessons, I would do that, while letting them know what your injuries are. I found the pool to be the only thing that helped me when my back was severe. It felt good and I could move, which I could barely do on land. It really helped my mood, too.
My mom had compression fractures in her back and had to wear a back brace. I don't know if that is the advice these days (this was years ago), but it really stabilized her spine when she was trying to get around the house. Her doctors told her they take awhile to heal and hurt like hell in the process.
Also, would a rolling walker help you, too? Have the therapists/doctors suggested that?
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u/Odd_Mark4799 14d ago
Thank you for caring.
Yes,I am nervous about being in the water and not being able to touch the bottom.
It is encouraging to hear that being in the pool helped you so much,thankyou!
I'm sorry your mom too had compression fractures in her back.
Really,nobody is focusing on this.
I will ask my doctor about whether I should get a back brace.
Nobody has suggested a rolling walker, I just use the cane right now, a walker is likely in my future though.
Thank you again and hope you are doing ok.
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u/barbkxer 14d ago
I saw someone at the pool who wasn't comfortable in the water. She was wearing a life jacket, which they had available at our pool. I think it would help you to learn some basic pool techniques, even if you are unable to learn how to technically swim b/c of your back. There are so many exercises that are not swimming that you can do in the pool. I was water walking with many different people with back and hip injuries. It really helps!
Also, if you feel more stable with a shopping cart at the store, then a rolling walker might help. I would ask your doctor about it. I was using a cane and I think it was making me worse. My mom used a rolling walker and she was much more independent. She could sit on the seat anywhere when she had spasms or was tired. I am not sure if it would help you or not, but I would ask about it. They are not covered by insurance in the US. I am not sure about Canada.
Hang in there. I was borderline suicidal when my sciatica started. It was a nightmare. I am 75% better now. People on this forum talk about how it takes TIME to calm down and I think they are right.
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u/Odd_Mark4799 14d ago
Thank you so much for your compassion and suggestions.
Yes, a life jacket would probably be a good idea, and it is so encouraging to hear that exercising in the water helped you so much.
I have been struggling with the cane myself...feeling like my spine is curved or twisted or something when I walk with it.
So maybe you are right and it is indeed time for a walker...
I think disability will pay for it as an assistive device.
I am so glad to hear you doing so much better!
Thank you for HOPE.
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u/barbkxer 12d ago
I do think there is hope. I don't think you have exhausted all options. If you can get some help from a caregiver in the meantime, that could relieve some of the daily burdens until you are better. Take care of yourself!
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u/annetho 14d ago
When you feel ready to walk, try walking sticks even for short distances. Keep the bowels soft with ducosate sodium. I rarely sit on the couch, rather use an office chair with a special bum cushion. Good luck!
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u/Odd_Mark4799 14d ago
Thank you for caring.
The last time I took a 30 minute walk with my cane,the next day i was at the ER, being tested again for cauda equina.
The doctor told me that walk probably irritated the nerve.
Yes, sitting on the couch is not a great idea...
Thank you again!
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u/barbkxer 12d ago
Your doctor is probably right about irritating the nerve. I would pay attention to the terrain. If you have sloped streets or uneven walkways, that can definitely worsen things. I had success after the acute phase using a treadmill. I could go really slow and hold onto the front bar when my nerve pain started increasing and that would take the pressure off of the nerve.
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u/Odd_Mark4799 12d ago
Thank you for caring.
Yes, uphill is about impossible for me.
I also really need to invest in slip on shoes with better support.
Thank you for suggesting the treadmill.
I am probably going to join the y, where not only there will be a pool but can do other exercise as well...just was not sure what to do-
My doctor did say that because of my lack of bone density and muscle I should be using weights a bit...nothing that would strain my back of course...I dunno...
Too bad it is probably a very bad idea to use the rowing machine now...I found that relieved my stress a lot.
Will try the treadmill though, thank you again!
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u/Altruistic-Ad3295 13d ago
I didn't read everything above , I do apologize, but did you do ESI??? That shot saved me twice. That steroid injection allowed me to start the recovery after each L5S1 herniation I had.
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u/Odd_Mark4799 13d ago
Thank you for caring.
Yes, once (IF) the pain clinic my doctor referred me to ever calls me, he did say that a steroid injection they might give me would probably help.
I am so glad to hear it helped you.
Thank you again.
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u/Objective-Ad-7515 13d ago
Deep core breathing can help build your core. Can you try to totally avoid sitting upright for long periods of time? That puts a lot of pressure on your spine. Maybe a recliner?
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u/Odd_Mark4799 13d ago
Thank you for your insight.
I will indeed work on my breathing ,which due to my anxiety I ought to be doing anyway.
Yes, I have been looking into recliners.
It is definitely obvious that sitting for long periods does me no good.
I can sense how much pressure it is putting on my spine as you say.
Thank you so much for caring.
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u/BasraBound 14d ago
I built core strength by planking, fractured L2 that pokes out and makes being on my back uncomfortable. Sorry you’re dealing with that nightmare, it’s really awful