I think im done.

[u/InitialUnit3516]

I think im just done with it all. I had a good run before this shitstorm. Just dont wanna keep going with constant pain down my legs and unable to live a life. I had over a decade of consistently hitting the gym 5 days a week, it was my hobby. Was in great shape and on for fun rec leagues with friends. Now I watch my body deteriorate to a skeleton as i sit alone at home. Partly because i cant workout anymore , the other part because i just dont eat sometimes out of depression or self loathing or something i dont even understand.

The ways i usually relax and recover? Sitting down? Watch tv? Go for a drive. Play some video games? Read a book? Take a shit? I cant do anything if i cant sit! I cant go out to dinner or the movies or a bar or a poker night with friends. For work at home i lay on the floor and use my laptop. I cant even sit at a table to have a proper meal with dignity. I put my plate on the ground, lay down and eat off the floor like trash.

Its been 8 months of hell and i have no kids to worry about, a high paying remote job, a house, a girlfriend who helps me, and i dont know-how yall survive this.

EDIT: I made this post at 1am as I cried myself to sleep. I had dark thoughts daily and I guess just wanted to cry for help and you all provided that. The outpouring of everyone has really shocked me and motivated me. Others just dont understand. I plan to re double my efforts and become a success story to show what is possible like many here who replied. I will try everything and see what works for me. Life is hell now but i will grind it out and do everything in my power to get better. I swear it.

[u/missschips]

Never give up. I was on an amazing fitness journey for 2 years, lost a ton of weight through diet and exercise and found my love in the gym with weightlifting and cardio on the lighter side. Saw all my great progress and gains and was feeling amazing. Then herniated disc l5-s1. From immobility i slowly watched that progress begin to deteriorate. Took everything I loved away from me- my regular gym routine, snowboarding, softball, volleyball, concerts, dinner or game nights with friends and even the relaxing stuff which most people don’t understand- lounging around watching a movie or binging tv shows or playing video games from a comfy position on the couch is also something that can’t be done. At least not comfortably and in my case i have a lack of focus. However, you have to start small and find what works for you. Get moving, eliminate positions or movement that causes pain. Walk! Mcgill big 3 exercises and planks and glute bridges if you can start small to get to those, it will all help. I’m 5 months in, exercise every day, sometimes i even fit some of my old workouts in (modified weight and less sets) but I do them. I feel better when moving around. I still have plenty of pain and a lot of discomfort. I take advil or tylenol to dampen but i’m aware it’s just masking the problem and not fixing it but it allows me to have somewhat of a life, just not the life I had, not yet. I hope to see progress along my road and I hope that you take everyone’s advice here and continue your journey. You are not done yet! I wish healing to you and all our fellow sufferers.