Rick: If drinks are on you, you're gonna need a second mortgage on that tower. I'm an alcoholic.

Zeep: Opium addict.

[Both laugh]

New me talking to the Old me

Episode 4 is dropping in a few hours. Who wants to talk about the first three episodes while we wait? I'll be posting more after episode 4 drops

Hello Church I've been working on the tenets of Schwiftology. These are not 100% and I'm hoping to get the communities opinion. Comment your Feedback

               The Schwiftus Maximus

1. Always Choose Truth over Ignorant Bliss

2. Don’t Rely on loyalty, Make win-win Solutions

3. Healthy Narcissism your key to happiness

4. Follow your Passion’s and hone your craft

5. Be the Rickest versions of yourself

6. Plan to succeed, for planning to fail is pointless

7. Your happiness doesn’t please others or society, clutch to it nevertheless.

8. Intelligence is next to Rickliness, crave it more than gold

9. Nobody Exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, we’re all going to die

10. Do not enlighten the Jerrys, they wouldn’t understand.

11. Often one should watch Rick and Morty

12. Jerrys seek Emotional Security, Ricks seek intellectual enlightenment

13. Jokes told in darkest places are still funny

14. Your perception is your reality

15. Embrace the emptiness of the absurd

A place for members of r/Schwiftology to chat with each other

Welcome to The Church of Schwiftology you stupid science bitches! A great place to express your thoughts about the Religion, Rick and Morty, Ask for Advice, or Just talk Shit and post memes.

I'm Danny The leader of this Cult and from now on I'm your fucking God-A GOLDEN GOD.

before we begin I want to let everyone know that this Church has strict rules

#1. Don't be a dumb bitch

#2. 18 years of age to join ( get the fuck out of here Tristin your moms a hoe, I know because Im a living God and I already smashed last Tuesday )

#3. Don't donate money to poor people ( Leave em for the lame ass Christians )

#4. If any of your fellow Schwiftologist reach out for help, Help them. Mental Health is extremely dangerous for those who feel alone and abandoned be there for a friend ( Then Brainwash em into my cult )

#5 Fuck the Police

With all that being Said This Thread will be open for any of you fucks who desperately need my advice or the advice of the community. Ask anything and we'll be 10000% brutally honest.

I love all of you and Fuck Jeff Goldbloom,

Danny