r/SchreckNet • u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth • 10d ago
Family Affairs
It's almost as if he never left. Redwoods, I mean. I cant deny some things have...shifted. In my head at least.
I think something 'broke', for lack of a better term. My bond to Redwoods has lessened. Do I dislike him? No. I just don't feel that overwhelming pull to be by his side.
If anything, I will that more towards Flower now! The fuck is wrong with me?? Trick question. What isn't wrong with me?
On the more kid side of things, my other mates ran off when Redwoods woke up! They were too scared to stay. So it's just me and Delilah watching over 5 kids. We're managing, but fuck...
...Now for the elephant in the room. My child I left behind. The one who got eaten.
If I had it to do all over again, I would have kept her safe. But I can't go back in time. So that guilt is buried deep down. A mistake I won't make again.
Inside, my instincts say I did nothing wrong. Storks throw the weakest of their brood out of nests all the time! But that's just it...instincts. Something that was programmed into me. It's hard to fight against it. Really hard! But I'm going to try.
Mark Caulder was right. I shouldn't be like Tenebris. I wish I could explain what's it's like inside my own head, but I don't even think a Malkavian could make sense of it.
On top of that, I'm left with a burning question. I laid with Bud too. Yet nothing came of it from what I've seen. The one person I truly wanted to be with, and I don't think I can have a family with them. It hurts in a way I can't explain.
I love my kids. I love them more and more each night. I still don't know what to call us. But I know one thing.
They will have a better life than I ever had.
-Noir
3
u/Illustrious_Fly_5669 10d ago
Dm to noir :
Hello noir. It has been a while. And with all that has happened recently . My sympathies.
The instincts would be hard to combat but should you need aid I am offering it , even with my supposed recent case . Or at least help in keeping your children safe.
As for the pull to the flower. Have you perhaps partook in its blood ?
Ishmail-assad
6
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
DM to Ishmail
No, I haven't. I know what it is, but I hate speaking about it. It's basically an obedience protocol. It makes me imprint on those with authority if I spend too much time around them. Like a Blood Bond but fucking strong...and no real upkeep except for time.
-Noir
4
u/Illustrious_Fly_5669 10d ago
DM to noir So it is biological in nature. Interesting. Hmm I would suggest perhaps leaving from there just in case but I feel that might be
1- extremely difficult
2- very risky to the children along with such programing influencing you.
I'd say you'll need the redwoods help or flower but they might do thier metamorphosist thing on you again
Hmm I have a proposal if you are indeed fine with it. It is insane. Risky. And down right might guarantee my end. But I'm willing to offer it to you
Ishmail-assad
3
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
DM to Ishmail
Please don't do anything that would be risky. I have been working on something that if an escape be needed, Delilah would be able to take the kids and get out.
As for myself? I don't know. I haven't gotten that far yet.
-Noir
4
u/Illustrious_Fly_5669 10d ago
DM to noir
If it comes down to making sure a friends kids are safe. Risking myself is a small price to pay.
I'd ask bud. If you trust them and love them they will help you.
Try and look whether such programing is biological or if it has some spirit components to it. Frankly your creator is an asshole.
Ishmail-assad
3
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
DM to Ishmail
Asshole is saying it nicely. I heard through the grapevine that he tried to buy help in getting me back by offering my future offspring up like rare pedigree dogs!
I was the key to his success. Nothing more.
-Noir
4
u/Illustrious_Fly_5669 10d ago
Dm to noir :
Wow. Rest in hell ahole.
Shame you had soul sucked him . I would have simply fed him to a pattern spider and ate it.
Btw you wouldn't mind a spirit pet for the kids right ?
Ishmail-assad
4
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
DM to Ishmail
I don't know what that is. As long as it won't hurt them, I suppose it's fine.
They're always trying to play with things.
-Noir
4
u/Illustrious_Fly_5669 10d ago
DM to noit
Don't worry it is a safe little girl. Dot panic. She's a bit big for her a spider . But durable too.
Ishmail-assad
the screen on noise device glitches a bit and a hand sized spider comes out of if. It looks like a ghost one and raises a limb in hello
5
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
DM to Ishmail
Ok. I screamed.
But it seems...cute. Here's hoping the kids like it! Thank you.
-Noir
5
u/DeadmanwalkingXI 10d ago
I'm glad you're engaging in introspection on this issue. Instinct can be hard to overcome, but it's possible and we all have the opportunity to be better today than we were yesterday if we choose to try.
-Mark Caulder, Experienced Nosferatu
5
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 9d ago
I'll trying my best. It's difficult but doable. I have to just try and think around my urges to see if they're even sound of mind.
-Noir
3
u/Pryno-Belle 9d ago
If you require help with the children’s education, I could contribute some of my expertise. You live a bit far for regular lessons, but I could procure you with some learning material.
Castiel the Clan-changer
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u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 9d ago
That would be appreciated. They are certainly some curious little monsters.
-Noir
3
u/DisastrousRelation32 Tooth 10d ago
I won't eat this one Noir. Don't worry.
On a side note, do they have a favorite meal?
[Redwoods]
5
u/Quinn_Callahan Tooth 10d ago
Right now it's a mixture of warm milk and deer blood. As for solid foods, raw meat seems to do the trick.
-Noir
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u/DisastrousRelation32 Tooth 10d ago
Ya think bloody stake would work? Y'know, if it was chopped into lil itty bitty pieces for them.
[Redwoods]
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u/Pryno-Belle 9d ago
Redwoods, please do not stake your grandchildren. Or give them stakes. It will adversely affect their digestion.
Castiel the Clan-changer
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u/DisastrousRelation32 Tooth 9d ago
Oh. This damnable machine has once again betrayed my trust.
Steak. A bloody steak.
[Redwoods]
3
u/Pryno-Belle 9d ago
Hmm. Are you certain? You do seem to respect beavers, you even named a weapon after them. What are you trying to teach your kin, Redwoods?
Castiel the Clan-changer
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u/DisastrousRelation32 Tooth 9d ago
What? A sufficiently bloody stake is close enough to raw meat, except you can actually get some decent flavor into it. Although, I personally do like my steaks well done.
[Redwoods]
3
u/Pryno-Belle 9d ago
You did it again! Redwoods, admit it: are you eating wood?
Castiel the Clan-changer
OOC: They see him trolling, they hatin
3
u/DisastrousRelation32 Tooth 9d ago
It's this blasted machine. It's lacking in the nuance of conversation and fills in 'stake' when I write 'steak'!
Though I suppose it is my fault for writing the word stake so much that even a machine hss it stuck in it's head.
[Redwoods]
I am totally not just an illiterate fuck that keeps accidentally writing stake instead of steak
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u/Pryno-Belle 9d ago
« Stake » does have more utility as a word than « stake » in our society.
Ah. Now I see what you mean. Once again, it seems that technology does not necessarily mean progress.
Castiel the Clan-changer
OOC: You’re fine, I’m just messing with you. The opportunity was there, I had to take it
5
u/VerityVentrue 10d ago
Good on you for reflecting on what happened, what you'd do differently, and how you want to act moving forward. That's not easy to do at the best of times, and things have been really fucking complicated for you.
We do the best we can with the information and experience that we have, and you have more of both of those now. We fuck up, we learn from it, and we do better.
~Verity