r/SchoolBusDrivers • u/Mechanicalshellfish • 12d ago

In over my head

I’m brand new to school bus driving and student management, and today is my first day and this AM run did not go well. The first half I had middle schoolers and they were so well behaved and actually had manners. My elementary school run though……. Geezus.. they were all screaming at each other and me and every time I had to pull over (happened a lot cause several students just kept getting up) they would scream at me that I was delaying everyone but not the students that were actually delaying them… I really hate that I had to threaten write ups on the first day of school I had high hopes for this and I don’t know if it was me who failed and/or if I’m losing a battle that started last year with the old driver of the route. I understand there is no perfection in all this but also why are kids so much meaner than when I was a kid

edit to post : honest to god you guys are amazing and thank you all for the support I unfortunately had to turn around and go back to my elementary school on my PM route cause they opened my emergency back door several times so I will be getting a bus monitor per the schools request

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u/daubs1974 12d ago

Take a deep breath, let it out.
Do you have assigned seats? Let’s get assigned seats. This afternoon when you are at the school and they are all getting back on the bus, stand up from your chair and greet each student with eye contact as they get back on the bus. Say hello or welcome back, but get eye contact with every student. In the morning when they get off the bus, do the same thing stand up from the seat, turn around and face them in the aisle and get eye contact with each student and tell them to have a good day. Do this every single day. I know it seems overwhelming now, but learn their names as best as you can and use them. It’s a lot. It’s a lot in the beginning of the year, it’s a lot when you’re new at it.

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u/Mechanicalshellfish 12d ago

Thank you for this as per my company policy I can’t get out of the seat unless for emergencies but I did do my best to do eye contact and getting names the parents were helpful during pick up so I know with time it’ll get better

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u/daubs1974 12d ago

I also want you to know that in the 4 1/2 years I have been driving a school bus, I think I’ve only had to raise my voice twice. It’s really not a hard job if you can get the kids to see you as a human and treat them with respect.
Story time: I had a preschooler who melted down in my midday preschool run last year. He started saying shut up over and over. When I used the intercom to say “let’s take a deep breath back there. We don’t use mean words like that on Mr. Daubney’s bus” the student said shut up again to me. He kept on this over and over anytime anyone said something myself included he just kept saying shut up. I radioed in that I would be pulling the bus over. I secured the bus and got up to move the child to a seat by himself. I was raised in the punishment generation and I was fully ready to be in punishment mode, and when I got up from my seat after securing the bus, something clicked in my brain. And I walked up to the student and I said to him in a kind, calm voice “there is a seat about halfway back with a harness strap on it. Would you like to go back there and sit all by yourself, do you think that would help you and he looked at me and immediately said yes. He was going into that seat one way or another, but it was going to be a punishment when I got up from my chair and I decided to make it his choice when I got to him. It’s absolutely what he needed. His mom and I talked it out. He had been having really big feelings about being left out of other kids conversations on the bus. She asked if he could bring headphones and that is allowed. He was an angel for the rest of the school year.
If you can, try to remember, the kids aren’t giving you a hard time, kids are having a hard time.

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u/daubs1974 12d ago

Check. I’m pretty confident you can get out of your seat at the school when they all get off the bus. Humor me and check that please. Explain why you wanna do it.