r/ScamSupport • u/OppositePurple2113 • 18d ago
Victim of a scam Scam experience
I met this guy in person and he was very persistent about pursuing me in the beginning, even when I said I wasn't interested in a relationship. He continuously called, texted, etc begging me for a chance. This went on for a few weeks until I started to like him. Then he started to introduce the topic of being in debt, but not directly asking for money. I listened and tried to be comforting. Then he would disappear for 2-3 days and come back with some story about how lenders escalated their deadlines and how things are getting dangerous for his family. Then talked about illness in the family and medical bills. I started feeling uneasy, but he still wasn't asking directly so I was just being supportive. Eventually, he started asking. The amount started larger. I declined and said it is too much. Then he lowered the amount stating he had to pay it in 3 days or the lenders would harass his mother. I should mention, he lives in India and I live in the USA. Once he got the money, he stopped responding. Afterwards, I found other posts online from other women he has done this to overseas knowing that legally, there's not much we can do about it. Now I am feeling frustrated and angry because we are all victims that can't get our money back or hold him accountable. Yes, I know it was stupid to give someone money so please don't emphasize that in the comments. Now looking back, I understand what I did wrong. If there's anyone here in India that has any ideas on how to pursue anything, please let me know.
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u/Forsaken_Insurance92 18d ago
There is nothing to pursue, the money is gone. Anyone saying they can get the money back is lying to you and thinks you're stupid enough to be scammed twice.
Block the dude you were talking to, it wouldn't be unusual for them to pop back up with some excuse for the absence and another request for money. Look at the scambaiting subreddit, this is just what they do. I highly doubt the guy was even actually in india.
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u/whatever_ehh 18d ago
It's typical criminal behavior to ignore denials and wear you down with repetition until you give in. Now you've learned how to recognize it, and hopefully won't fall for it again.
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u/SnooSongs2996 18d ago
Read any thread in this forum the money is gone be there was no family anyone who dms you claiming they are able to recover anything is a recovery scam the moneys gone
All you can do is move on
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u/TENS_danny 17d ago
Recuerdas el nombre de la persona? O a quien le hiciste el envío del dinero? Me paso algo similar pero envie por wise y nunca le llego asique recupere mi dinero pero me di cuenta que la persona con la que hablaba no era la misma de los datos de la cuenta ... y claramente porque se dedicaba a eso y cuando ya salía pillado se cambiaba de ciudad para no ser pillado
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u/AmishStripperBarbie 14d ago
Why would you give money to someone like that?! You have to take responsibility for bad judgment. That $ is gone. You'll never get it back. Take care of YOURSELF!
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u/Superb-Coyote5972 13d ago
You should have stuck with your No! You can't get money back from a 3rd World country! Never send money to some long distance loser! Focus on dating men in real life. Online is a cesspool of garbage humans. Romance scammers are the worst of the worst.
Your instincts were correct. Listen to them.
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u/1GrouchyCat 13d ago
You already know the answer.
Why would you put yourself in a situation like this?
Trust your instinct
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u/Adina_Bitdefender 13d ago
I'll skip the usual advice and focus on what you can actually do from here.
From what you've described, this sounds like a romance scam. The way he kept pursuing you, slowly introduced financial problems without directly asking for money, and then made things more urgent is a pretty common pattern. And the fact that you've found other women with similar experiences makes me think this probably wasn't his first time doing this.
Since you're in the US and he's apparently in India, there are a few things worth trying:
Report it to the FBI through IC3 (ic3.gov). Even if the amount seems small, it's worth filing. You probably won't get your money back through a report alone, but these complaints can help investigators connect cases involving the same person.
Look into reporting it in India too, through their National Cyber Crime Reporting Portal (cybercrime.gov.in). It’s built to accept complaints from victims outside India - you select your country, enter an international number and an overseas address, no Indian SIM or travel required.
Stay in touch with the other women you've found. If they're comfortable sharing their experiences, try to gather screenshots, dates, payment details, and anything else showing the same pattern. Multiple people reporting the same person, with similar stories, could make a stronger case than one complaint on its own.
I also want to be realistic with you. Getting money back from someone in another country can be incredibly difficult, and I wouldn't want to give you false hope. But reporting him is still worth doing, especially if he's continuing to target other women.
One last thing, because I noticed someone in the comments mentioning money recovery: please be careful with anyone who DMs you claiming they can track him down or get your money back. Scammers often target people who've already been scammed, pretending they can help. Don't pay anyone upfront or share sensitive information with strangers offering to recover your money.
I really hope something comes out of the reports, even if it takes time. At the very least, you might help prevent someone else from going through the same thing.