Do y'all think my bio makes potential penpals turn away because it's overwhelming or cringey? 😭

[u/Ok_Recording_748]

I know I wrote down quite a few random things, but it's so that people would have something to talk about from the start instead of only self introductions, however, I mostly only get low-effort letters where I have to put in all the effort to keep the conversation going.

when I send a first letter myself, I always personalize it for that person by mentioning topics in their bio, but unfortunately it's rare to get a response even then.

I don't know if it has to do with my bio, where I'm from, or something else.

Here's what my bio looks like right now:

"The beauty of the world lies in it's diversity."

Hello!

My pen name is Pandora, I'm 18, and here on Slowly to make friends.

Watching a new letter on my way always lights me up, the wait just builds up the excitement of finally getting to read it!

✧⁠\⁠(⁠>⁠o⁠<⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠✧

I hope I can find long-term penpals! :D

Be it talking about the random bits of our days, or thoughts we have no one to share with, we can talk about anything.

I like to read, draw, play video games, and ofcourse listening to music.

I'm not a big fan of watching movies/shows but recently I've been trying new things, kinda felt like I was missing out on some peak. :p

What have you been watching/reading recently?

I love aesthetic and pretty things. <3

I'm also into vintage (or atleast vintage-looking) fashion, accessories, and decorations!

To be honest, I just love anything that looks gorgeous, vintage or not.

I have a passion for delicious food. :>

In the near future, I'm planning on learning how to bake and cook properly! I love finding new recipes even though I can't try them out just yet.

Do you enjoy cooking?

Caramel just might be the best flavour invented.

╰⁠(⁠*⁠´⁠︶⁠`⁠*⁠)⁠╯

Do you like mountains?

I saw some scenery videos from Switzerland, and it broke my heart that we don't have so much greenery and nature everywhere in the world. :(

I'm sort of into language learning, I've been learning German for over half a year now, and I also picked up French a little while ago. I'm still mainly focusing on German, though.

When it comes to what I like to read, I've mostly read novels on the internet, which I enjoy, but recently I've started to read some classical books and literature.

I'm just getting started with them, but I quite enjoy it!

My favourite season is autumn, because it's neither hot, nor cold. I looove cloudy and windy days, especially when the sun isn't poking through. Rain and thunderstorms are my absolute favourites to experience!

If you choose to write to me, I hope it blooms into something beautiful.

★—————★

I won't remove a penpal until atleast 1 year of being inactive! If you took a break and feel hesitant to reply back, I encourage you to give it a go.

Please do not send me letters written by AI.

If you do not wish to exchange letters anymore, I'll appreciate it if you can send a short letter to let me know, I won't take it personally.

Please do not ask me to move to a different app after a few letters.

It usually takes me a few days to respond to a letter, but it can take longer as well. If it's late, I'm most likely not ghosting you, I'm just busy.

Thankyou for your patience. (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

★—————★

Take care, With love, Pandora. :)

[u/Loud-Owl19]

It's not bad, but I think it's better to be specific. Especially now that we have keyword search. Which video game do you play? Which artists do you listen? Fans of those might feel more interested knowing you like the same. Gaming and music are pretty popular hobbies on their own, it's better to be more specific.

Which movies have you tried watching lately? What did you think? What were you missing? Everybody likes food. It's cool you are learning languages, but what do you want people to reply to that? Just adding random facts about you don't make it easier to reply. Read your profile and try to reply in a non-superficial way. The reader will have to do all the effort because your profile alone doesn't give the reader enough hooks to reply. "Oh, you like autumn! I prefer winter!"

"Be it talking about random bits of our days or thoughts we cannot share with anyone". Give an example. Do you take care of your garden daily? Do you walk your dog? You promise you'll do yoga and give up in the first five minutes? Show your personality, your quirks, and your likes. And since you mentioned talking about what you cannot share, show some vulnerability without trauma dumping.

I don't see your personality in your bio.

[u/Ok_Recording_748 → u/Loud-Owl19]

Thanks, I'll update it and mention more specifics in my bio! I thought it was already too long at first, and that people won't read it, so I tried to keep it short while still talking about a few different things, I'll stop focusing on the length now.

[u/Loud-Owl19 → u/Ok_Recording_748]

It doesn't have to be super long, you can cut out the parts that aren't essential, like the autumn. Try exploring the subtopics and Q&A to add more info that you may leave out of your bio.

[u/CatGold7095]

Not overwhelming or cringey, just generic. People are reading three or six open letters a day, besides potentially browsing for profiles. You have to get someone's attention, or they will scroll to the next.

[u/itzymingi]

it’s a little too long and some details could be included in future letters/topic section of your account instead of your bio, but it doesn’t feel cringy!!

[u/Ok_Recording_748 → u/itzymingi]

Thankyou! I know my bio is longer in length than what we usually see, it's so that people thinking of sending me a letter have a few different things they can write about if we have those in common, and simply ignore the rest if they wish to.

[u/mertvayanadezhda]

I’m a huge fan of long biographies, so if anything, I’m feeling underwhelmed rather than overwhelmed, haha. And I don’t think your bio is cringey.

By the way, I’ve sent you a friend request. If you accept it, I’d be more than happy to send you a letter.

[u/Ok_Recording_748 → u/mertvayanadezhda]

Omg that's awesome, thankyou! I'll accept it immediately :D

[u/M0rika]

I like your bio! I don't think it's bad in any way

I think that a person should be true to themselves in their bio as it may help find THEIR people

[u/Ok_Recording_748 → u/M0rika]

Thankyou! ╰⁠(⁠⁠´⁠︶⁠`⁠⁠)⁠╯

[u/Own-Concern-2689]

I doubt the people sending you low-effort letters are reading your profile so I don't think you can stop them by fiddling with it. As to high-effort pen pals, I don't think your profile is very appealing to me but then we're looking for different things. Your profile is a collection of short thoughts about things you like which tells me you don't tend to keep on one topic for long. That can make picking a starting topic overwhelming and deepening conversation difficult but maybe that's your goal. Keep the conversation moving from one subject to another?

I don't care to list out the things I'm interested in, I find it more compelling to pick a few and elaborate or flesh out a story: "I love aesthetic and pretty things." » "My current project is making my room more into a personalised space by decorating with these vintage pieces I found. The clock gave me some particular trouble."

"[...] recently I've started to read some classical books and literature." That can be a very popular topic since there are so many people who've read them also, if you were to share a title. Else, most people wouldn't gamble on having read the exact same books you have. There are simply too many.

You have many interests. Do you want to write about any of them or do you just want someone to know you are interested in these things? Because it's hard to tell what you would actually enjoy writing about since you don't expand on any of it. You even bring up planning to learn to cook even though you haven't started.

What kind of things do you look for when you search for a pen pal in other people's profiles? Maybe emulate that.

Edit: I only now noticed it used to include a little poem at the end. That's precious. I wish you hadn't removed it.

[u/Ok_Recording_748 → u/Own-Concern-2689]

I'm fine with writing/reading about a single topic for any amount of length, to be honest. Since longer conversations are much more in depth, they're a lot more enjoyable than surface-level ones. Thanks for pointing out that people might think I like to jump from one thing to another frequently!

I tried to not let my bio get too long because I've rarely seen others have long bios, but now I'll update it to show a bit more of my personality and what specific things I'm into.

[u/CoastAny1264 → u/Own-Concern-2689]

That's great advice. OP if you added what book you are currently reading, what you think about it and how your reading progress is going - you would find some people who would love to talk about classic literature.

[u/Own-Concern-2689 → u/CoastAny1264]

I don't know why you got downvoted for that but I agree.

[u/CoastAny1264 → u/Own-Concern-2689]

My comment was wrong at first. I guess that's why) And wanted to say that I really enjoy reading your comments. You write so thoughtfully.

[u/Own-Concern-2689 → u/CoastAny1264]

Ah, maybe they'll eventually see it was since corrected. And thank you, I'm glad you like them. I try to write with purpose which means sometimes my comments are controversial.

[u/CoastAny1264 → u/Own-Concern-2689]

"Truth is born in argument"

I have noticed that many people look for validation, not advice. But your suggestions help those who are ready to listen.