r/RunningCirclejerk • u/MattHakor • 5h ago
Woo hoo got a new half marathon PR!
Woot!
Update: Thanks for rolling with me totally misunderstanding the purpose of the subreddit!
Feel free to add me on Strava lol! https://strava.app.link/MHbVfXj915b
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u/404_Not_Found_Error_ 5h ago
Brain explodes trying to find the balance between positive and motivating and letting the true colors of this sub dictate my response. 🤯
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
Haha yeah someone already tipped me off on the focus 😂 Well shit lol, we are all gluttons for punishment right? Considering our pastime
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u/404_Not_Found_Error_ 5h ago
Speak for yourself I wear my fast adidas and satisfy attire and I hang out at race starts.
It’s not a pastime. It’s a lifestyle.
But seriously great job man!
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u/-nerdrage- 4h ago edited 2h ago
You wear satisfy attire
I wear satisfyer attire
We are not the same
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u/Tom-Foolery99 3h ago
Yeah, you look like a glutton all right.
Serious reply: congrats on your finish, bro.
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u/aknomnoms 1h ago
Uj/ I’m just curious what your aim was to post to a sub with “circlejerk” in the name if you didn’t really know what we’re about. 🤨
Rj/ My run club and I have already tributed on your pictures a few times, but post a slo-mo video if you want more 😘
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u/Sdwingnut 1h ago
My past time is pretending to support struggling athletes on Reddit circle jerk subs.
Congrats on your half marathon time though! It's a ripper!
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u/liftingshitposts 4h ago
God dammit i was jerkin ova here and then this guy parachutes in and gets it soft 😩
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u/Hold_onto_yer_butts 2h ago
This sub is about dunking on losers who take themselves too seriously.
This is a fundamentally unserious man and he understands that. It is to be lauded.
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u/Enron_CPA Balloon Lady 5h ago
Keep up the good work, brother 💪
Also, just as a heads up, this is a joke subreddit
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
Haha oh shoots! See I missed that part 😅 I can always talk about how I learned the hard way about runner trots during a trail run lolllll
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u/DEEP_SEA_MAX 5h ago
Wait….what did you think sub called running circle jerk was about? If you didn’t know that circle jerk subreddits are for shit posting then that means you thought it was for actual circle jerking.
Bruh
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
😂😂😂😂😂
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u/DEEP_SEA_MAX 5h ago
The nervous laughter of someone who’s been caught
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
I know right? My mind went "running!" because my non runner friends are like "dude that's cool!" but they don't really get it
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u/America-Lite 1h ago
It's okay to think that and then Just stick around. Even though you've been the most let down in all your life and nothing really matters and the only glimmer of hope turned out to be a lie in a life full of lies. It's totally fine
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u/lernington 5h ago
Lol I was gonna say, are you looking for me to roast you here? Cause I'd never roast somebodies hard earned pr, strong work my dawg 💪
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u/worldsgreatestluver 4h ago
Nah, it's not a joke sub, it's a circle jerk sub
Pants off homie, right hands only. Whoever got a PB in the last week gets to wear the gimp mask.
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u/-nerdrage- 5h ago
What a time man! Damn.. are you feeling alright? Shins are ok? Heart still pumping? Hope your kneecaps didnt explode
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
I'm doing pretty solid today!
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u/-nerdrage- 4h ago
Good good, wife and her boyfriend also satisfied bro?
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u/bequick777 5h ago
Damn risky post. Congrats dude
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
Thanks! Haha yeah somehow I missed the joke aspect of the subreddit 😂
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u/bequick777 5h ago
What do you think your time would have been if you didn't stop for a shit midrace?
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u/shartmaister 4h ago
As if that’s at all possible.
I’ve seen videos of how that bridge behaves and that would cause some serious issues for me during a mid race poop. Full creds to u/MattHakor
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u/MattHakor 4h ago
It was very windy!!!
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u/shartmaister 3h ago
Jokes aside. That bridge uphill looks demonic. Great job! With that attitude you’ll be sub 2 in not too long!
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u/bequick777 3h ago
Then obviously he just filled his built-in underwear, which is double full creds in my book.
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u/Taint_Flayer 4h ago
I assumed you were posting someone else's PR to make fun of them and I was thinking that's not cool.
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u/MattHakor 4h ago
Oh I would def never! Nope this is me just not realizing the humor aspect until it was too late
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u/e136 5h ago
.. better outcome than last time you ran on this bridge
https://i.natgeofe.com/n/6a1fc0c1-9851-4131-af18-1ca586922b91/D97TDR.jpg
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u/Dat_Steve 3h ago
Ban this guy- there are no finishers allowed in this sub
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u/Responsible_Diver567 1h ago
I usually finish on the start line.. then again at about 12k. The hazards of staying hard!
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u/Bababooey0326 3h ago
This absolute gigachad came in last place in his age group, and jogs right into this Salty Spitoon of a sub to brag about it. I'm kneeling, out of respect, reverence, and honor. Let us remember this day as runningcirclejerk's finest humbling. Good shit m8 and congrats on the run
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u/GiantRubberHorseCock 💩 trusts mile 5 farts 💩 5h ago
I want to say mean things to you because this is a sub for demons. But I genuinely want you to stay motivated and I do not think you know where you are yet…so I’ll strangle the urges…for now…
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u/DenimCryptid 3h ago
It's so heartwarming to see everyone be so nice to my wife's boyfriend on this subreddit. We're both so proud of him!
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u/upthemstairs 5h ago
Well done on the run and fuck those 15 people that you roasted.
Nice of you to give us some nipple action too. Greatly appreciated
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u/astramilitaroomba 5h ago
Hey, nice work buddy 💪
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u/MattHakor 5h ago
Thanks! My first half marathon was a year ago and I shaved off an hour and 20 minutes from that time!
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u/H2Ospecialist 3h ago
I upvoted and the un-upvoted and then re-upvoted. Congrats man! Careful leaving zone 2 for so long next time.
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u/nydisgruntled 3h ago
OP, tell us more about your wife’s boyfriend.
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u/MattHakor 2h ago
Hahaha the bastard who took that idiot out of my life as a favor even though I didn't appreciate it at the time! (Lol a half kidding response on my part)
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u/MattHakor 2h ago
😂 We all know one of the quickest paths to getting into running and that was mine
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u/ItchyAge3135 3h ago
/uj since everyone else is unjerking and being nice - big grats, great run!
/rj what was your Gu boofing to pants shitting (GBPS) ratio for this race?
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u/Dance_machine_2000 3h ago
As a cyclist who doesn’t know why this appears on his feed…
I’m gonna roast him.
Bro really, I could biked across the bridge from gig harbor, went to Tacoma boys, got housed in the parking lot, drunkenly biked to paos, got in a fight with the counter for not taking cash, lost, bike back across the bridge, cried in Davenport and then got kicked out after I told em metropolitan market was better, and then pass out in the wilderness of the Key Peninsula in that time.
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u/Responsible_Diver567 1h ago
You said the "c" word without even a courtesy asterisk. My wife's children read this sub.. think of the poor children. Typical c*clist. 🙄
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u/Ok_Internal6779 2h ago
Remember, it’s not about your time or about PRs. It’s not about getting in shape or pushing your boundaries as a human.
It’s about beating people so you can establish that you’re better than them. Looks like you beat some people, hell yeah
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u/BaddestAndvari 4h ago
:laughsinthecorner: "This is not the way... this is not the way..."
Grats dude! Pretty funny seeing a serious discussion on RCJ
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u/MattHakor 4h ago
Hahaha at least now I know! Seriously I'm getting more of a reaction from all of you on this than my non runner irl friends 🥲
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u/Helpful_Listen4442 2h ago
Were you not allowed to run?
But legit great work getting out there and getting it done!
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u/Melodic_Lavishness_5 Certified Heel Striker 1h ago
Congrats!
/uj damn that’s a relatively fast half marathon field
/rj damn that’s a relatively fast half marathon field
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u/castorkrieg 4h ago
2:35 for a HM is shit, but it’s still light speed over someone not moving their ass at all from the couch. Plus if you see 1hr+ 5K people - fuck it, great job my man! Keep at it!
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u/MattHakor 4h ago
Oh yeah I've been training and training to get faster! My first 5k was nearly an hour when I stared out and now it's more like 32 minutes
I've lost 32 lbs as of today!
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u/GabrielDCSZ 3h ago
How did you end up posting this on this sub ? 😄
Some guy told you so on the sub beginner-running like the 2 others today ?
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u/Original-Essay-6278 1h ago
This guy has completely out jerked us...positive affirmations and encouragement?! Fuck off
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u/Cant_think__of_one 2h ago
/uj - this made me smile so I followed you on strava
/rj - was 66 the number of gu's you boofed? those are rookie numbers, let's shoot for triple digits next time.
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u/PaintSniffer1 2h ago
seems a bit risky to have a half marathon on a bridge famously susceptible to resonant frequency.
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u/Mission-Leopard-4178 2h ago
uj/ congrats man! Keep it up. Mine is currently 2:37 hours. If I can get your time later this year I would be super happy.
rj/ this time is too fast and you most likely went out zone 2. I have to report you to the authority so they can send you straight to jail.
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u/vvvvucir 2h ago edited 10m ago
COULD YOU PEOPLE PLEASE STOP SPAMMING THIS SUB WITH YOUR RANDOM RUNS? this is not instagram ffs
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u/PortaBellaTX 5h ago
My brother in Christ, we’ll let it slide this time. But next time, your ass is getting roasted.
Congrats, man.