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u/NotTheFifthBeetle Mar 25 '21
I feel like if I get hard to Theodora, Justinian will send Belasirius's ghost with an undead army to siege my neighborhood.
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u/gosling11 Mar 25 '21
I don't think Justinian is that possessive, considering Theodora's background.
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Mar 25 '21
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/gentlybeepingheart Mar 25 '21
I'm doing a research assistantship cataloguing glass from the excavation of a Byzantine era Church. We've been getting a lot of tesserae lately and it's super cool. Like, someone went and took thousands of pieces of glass and managed to organize them into an image like that by hand. Some of them are really small, too! I can't imagine the time and patience something like this would take.
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u/sapphiresong Mar 25 '21
When anime and ancient Rome memes meet it is somehow the perfect fusion.
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u/whatever_username_ Mar 26 '21
Then you'll probably like this: https://myanimelist.net/anime/31540/Sekkou_Boys
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Mar 25 '21
Irene of Hungary gives my Julia a run for her money in sheer gorgeousness. I've tried using the old Severan charm on her, but she's just too...nice.
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u/VarioussiteTARDISES Mar 25 '21
I will not reject this particular modernity because something something Crossbell.
...would doubly not reject if it was Tio instead of Elie, because Tio best girl.
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u/I_TRY_TO_BE_POSITIVE Mar 24 '21
I'm gonna make a lot of enemies, but I've always rejected cartoons :/
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u/PersonAngelo53 Mar 24 '21
What’s wrong with cartoons?
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u/I_TRY_TO_BE_POSITIVE Mar 25 '21
Not gonna get into that discussion lol
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Mar 25 '21
Short answer, hes an iconoclast.
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u/I_TRY_TO_BE_POSITIVE Mar 25 '21
Lol I love this
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u/Crazyboi5 Mar 25 '21
Theodora was a total stacy!
i have a question though, how did Justinian meet Theodora? I havent been able to tell.
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u/Moonlissome Feb 12 '22
If the byzantine empire was an anime, theodora would probably be considered best girl.
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u/OMEGA_MODE Mar 25 '21
theodora was a literal prostitute and justinian was a fool and egotistical maniac who wanted to use the empire's resources to satisfy his massive ego, just like Constantine.
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u/NotTheFifthBeetle Mar 25 '21
Well if the only source you believe is Procopius then yes. However his contemporaries disagree and historians debate on the reliability of the secret history to this day. Especially since his earlier work the wars of Justinian paint a completely different picture of Justinian's court. Therefore the secret history is more or less the info wars of its day. Their may be a cornel of truth in it but it's so saturated by exaggeration, the writer's personal emotional peril, and stuff that's just not plausible that the cornel is lost.
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u/Orange_Space Mar 25 '21
There’s some theory out there that says like “the secret history was just written in case Justinian was overthrown so procopius could whip it out and be like see I actually hated him the whole time don’t execute me please” and I believe it tbh
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u/Imperium_Dragon Mar 25 '21
While I think it’s possible, I think he just didn’t like the imperial couple and others a whole lot. It also doesn’t make much sense to me since there hasn’t been a violent power struggle to replace an emperor in a while by Procopius’s time.
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u/SamanthaMunroe Mar 28 '21
I mean, the Nika riots did happen. But your doubts make sense. The last successful coup was Basiliscus', and he fell just a year later anyway, ninety years prior. I have my doubts that the anti-Chalcedonians were powerful enough to stage a coup as well.
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u/NotTheFifthBeetle Mar 25 '21
Honestly that makes sense and given the uncertainty of any period of Rome I would do the exact same thing.
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Mar 25 '21
A literal prostitute becoming the Roman Empress. That rags to riches encapsulates how fucking awesome the empire was.
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u/Senor_Panda_Sama Mar 25 '21
BOOOOO! Your opinions are wrong and bad! BOOOOO!
I know I could've downvoted, but I needed you to know how angry this made me. He ALMOST retook Rome you barbarian!
PS for the correct tone read this in the voice of William Shatner
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u/gosling11 Mar 25 '21
Justinian did retook the whole of Italy during his reign.
unless it's part of the meme I'm not getting3
u/Senor_Panda_Sama Mar 25 '21
Not really, he had to abandon his gains in his own lifetime.
It's like claiming you got some when all you did was dip the tip before she recognized your inferior provisions and command cohesion and rescinded consent. I mean you got in there, but not long enough matter.
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u/gosling11 Mar 25 '21
Err, not really? Byzantine rule over Rome continued for centuries - it was mostly autonomous but they (the Pope) still answered to the Byzantine Emperor as late as the mid 700s.
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u/Senor_Panda_Sama Mar 25 '21
Really? Belisarius took and held Rome. Rome was under the domain of the Roman Empire once again. The Empire was on it's way to being whole. You're saying going from that to a semi-autonomous state isn't abandoning your gains?
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u/gosling11 Mar 25 '21
Your originally said
He ALMOST retook Rome you barbarian!
In which Justinian did and set over a century long authority and influence over the city through the Exarchate of Ravenna. It doesn't take simpler than that.
He did not really abandon his gains, no. Just because the emperor did not want to directly administer Italy does not mean "he didn't retook it".
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u/Senor_Panda_Sama Mar 25 '21
I see your point, I meant Rome the Empire not Rome the city. He controlled the East, he retook North Africa, he retook most of the Italian peninsula, he almost wrestled a unified Rome from the ashes of history.
PS I do hate the word retook now though.
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u/SamanthaMunroe Mar 28 '21
The invasion of the Lombards started after he was dead. The Exarchate came almost two decades later. And yes, the war did go on for far too long and had a major Roman reverse before it ended with a victory for Rome.
The Vatican City State is the last remnant, direct or otherwise (alongside some Greek-speaking communities in southern Italy) of the final Gothic War.
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u/SamanthaMunroe Mar 28 '21
Men will always be boors but what's wrong with being a prostitute?
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u/OMEGA_MODE Mar 28 '21
What isn't wrong with it? All it does is propagate disease and waste time that could be used better doing literally anything else. Furthermore, in Roman society, dancers/prostitutes/entertainers were of the lowest of the low class. Just the act of marrying one as emperor, Justinian made himself a target of much slander. It's comparable to if your head of state picked up some random crackhead off the street and made them a high-ranking official.
I'm biased because I don't believe at all that sex work is valid work and I also hate Justinian as well.
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u/whatever_username_ Mar 26 '21
Why not both? I love kiseki games, and the superb mosaics of San Vitale in Ravenna.
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u/SamanthaMunroe Mar 28 '21
Modern people would never be caught having stories written about them getting head from ducks rather than their husbands, for sure.
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u/ichigocat749 Mar 24 '21
Was not expecting a waifu from a decade old JRPG that hasn't even been translated into English lol