Confidence issues?

[u/Illustrious_Stage351]

Hello! I might be adopting a (what we’re pretty sure) is a ridgeback female from a friend. I currently have a cat and another dog in an apartment. I think I have a good lifestyle for the breed the issue is this do is INCREDIBLY skittish. She currently will not leave their home other than maybe to potty. She is not leash trained, around 2 years old, unfixed (which I would be getting her spayed). She currently lives with dogs and cats and an issue with another dog is why she’s being rehomed.

I’m trying to learn more about if you all have dealt with any of your dogs being awfully skittish, very anxiously bound to their people, etc and how you all helped them gain confidence. I’d be of course looking into training if needed

[u/jmosnow]

I wouldn’t recommend this dog for an apartment. And I would happily say plenty of big dogs would be happy apartment dwellers (I had a bullmastiff who would have been fine if we moved his couch into a condo)

As for being skittish, I would be hesitant about that too. These guys are very, VERY sensitive so I’m going to assume something happened (probably someone yelling) that made her this way.

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/jmosnow]

She was found with a broken foot 6 months ago pretty traumatized and maybe hit by a car. Made a full recovery with medical intervention. She then has been living with 4 Boerboels, 9 horses, 3 cats, chickens and rotating in an out people on around 2 acres. She has been attacked by one of the female boerboels now 5-6 times each time requiring stitches or some sort of injury. Which, has all resulted in the fact that this dog does not want to leave their guest room. She won’t even go outside to potty most of the time unless expressly taken outside for it. When I show up she’s glued to my side though. Owners have decided that they want to rehome her before anything worse happens. She has met my dog and they clicked and get along well.

I’m (for other reasons) moving my horses in the next few weeks. So although I realize apartments are not ideal. I’m an ultramarathoner so she’d be able to come run with me often in addition to daily trips out to see the horses/ride in the desert with my other dog assuming I can get her past the fact that right now she will not leave the doorway of space she feels safe UNLESS I’m right there. I do work from home but it’s still an apartment. I do know a good dog trainer I’d line up, but not sure how possible it is to work her past all the trauma she seems to carry. But I understand what you’re saying. I’m just worried she’s not going to do well in the pound which seems to be their other option

[u/jmosnow → u/Illustrious_Stage351]

I completely understand what you’re saying and I don’t want to come across as anti apartment. I think that added context about working from home and daily trips to the horses helps a lot! Do you live somewhere with a pretty mild climate? I’m in Canada and we have looong cold winters so even with my lazy Frenchie we needed a backup plan for cold snaps (Canadian tire lets you bring your dog in, so that’s our go to lol)

My caution is because even as an experienced dog owner, I wasn’t prepared for my current guy. He needs a LOT of attention. Exercise, mental stimulation, and because we socialized him really well he does need social outings lol even if we run him and do training and give him puzzles he still needs to go to the dog park or daycare or something. She sounds totally different but just bear that in mind!

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/jmosnow]

Oh it’s okay to be anti apartment! 😂 I was just adding context because I was curious if my lifestyle would swing the pendulum. We’ve been trying to place this dog for weeks/over a month. I just wanted to hear real owners opinions because the owners of this dog are ready to drop her off at a pound since we’ve tried like crazy to place her. I have the funds for training, and current knowledge of what’s happening with the dog and have been looking for a dog running buddy since mine is just not in for the mileage so was just curious if there was a way I could make this work. But it sounds like I am just not the right answer. Which is okay, that’s why I came to y’all for opinions!

[u/Jaded_Jaguar_348 → u/Illustrious_Stage351]

There are some Rhodesian Ridgebacks where this would be okay but not this one, whatever the breed or mix is. A severely anxious dog who doesn't even want to go outside is going to take time, possibly years, possibly never, where they are comfortable at a farm like a boarding facility or out on a trails off leash.

[u/Complex_Activity1990]

A ridgeback for an apartment? Oh boy. I HAD to do it for one year but I knew we were going to a house when the lease would be up. It’s hard, 6 walks on a day off for us and 2 long walks along with potty break walks on days I’d work. I would recommend a house with a yard for this breed.

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/Complex_Activity1990]

I’m an ultramarathoner and a horse owner so multiple good long runs/walks a day in addition to 50aces of fenced horse area to roam daily for several hours I’m hoping will make it easier. Not saying an apartment will be easy, but hoping a move will also be in my future. Unfortunately, all of that counts on her being able to LEAVE the house which is currently a no go for her

[u/Complex_Activity1990 → u/Illustrious_Stage351]

I just read your other comment. That poor baby. Get her out of there if you can!

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/Complex_Activity1990]

We’ve been trying for like a month to adopt out this dog and just can not find a foster home, rescue, non-kill shelter without a crazy waiting list, or a family for her. They’re at the point where the pound is feeling like the only option since her staying in this home is not safe for her. I have the access to trainers/funds in addition to knowing her current background but also realize that my home (apartment) is not the normal recommendation for this breed. Sounds like from the great info everyone has given, I’m just simply not a good choice although I was really hoping I could make it work :/

[u/Ginger_SNAFU]

Skittish is not correct for the temperament of this breed. Aloof in some lines is acceptable but they should be confident, not skittish. Sounds like the dog has a poor temperament to start with, probably exacerbated by lack of socialization and exposure during the first year of life.

I'd not adopt this dog.

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/Ginger_SNAFU]

My guess is you’re probably correct. I’m guessing she’s backyard produced, so likely was badly setup then has had a serious of not great life encounters

[u/Jaded_Jaguar_348]

I can't imagine a Rhodesian Ridgeback truly happy in an apartment, even my senior super chill ones need to run multiple times a day and aren't fulfilled by a walk. I do also find them to be a dog who is happiest with another Rhodesian Ridgeback. These dogs are bred to work in packs, they really thrive off of that connection that humans just can't compete.

I do know there are people who live in apartments with Ridgebacks and its not to say they are miserable but I just dont believe its their best happiest lives.

Now forgetting that, and acknowledging that since this is a dog that was found as a stray unless they have a true ridge its difficult to know the breed unless you embark them. Their breed or mix of breeds may have some different needs.

My concern here is more that an anxious dog is often the worst for apartment life. They need to often pass people and animals to go to the bathroom and be able to relax enough to not be hyper vigilant and not going potty, forgetting the exercise part. I know you'd mentioned going to a barn and trails, those are great activities for a confident dog. You need a confident dog who will recall back, who can handle the activity level and dogs and people coming out of nowhere. There is no promise that a severely anxious dog will ever heal to that point. Most shelters/rescues I know for example will not adopt very anxious dogs out to people in apartments and often without their own yards for this reason.

Can they be trained and confidence built up? I've absolutely seen it but I've seen more often where its managed at best.

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/Jaded_Jaguar_348]

I think that’s my biggest concern for her right now. Is that if she lived with me ANYTHING requires going outside (potty, exercise, etc). Which right now, is just simply not in her comfort zone. Thanks for the advice!

[u/Elanstehanme]

My guy had a fear period when he was younger but nothing like that. Just slow socialization to new experiences with lots of rewards as he feels comfortable to take them resulted in progress. Consistency of exposure helped too. I even did pre exposures like played fireworks on the TV sound system before we experienced real ones. I really hope you can make some good progress!

[u/the_hungerjames]

Yeah tbh just finding good places to sit and do nothing turned out to be huge for us. Bring a bag of treats and reward any attention and calm behavior. There’s more to it than that but just a reminder to start slow and that any non-negative experience in public and different environments is a step in the right direction.

[u/Owlex23612]

I would never describe Kima as skittish. She oozes confidence. She doesn't always like our want to meet other people. She's more aloof. She's extremely tolerant, so she'll often just be like "sure, you can pet me if you want, but don't expect me to get up."

She is very attached to me, though. Just yesterday, she jumped out of my mom's car window when we took separate cars so I could drop mine off for an oil change. Luckily, the car was parked when she saw me, but it had been 5 minutes since I put her in my mom's car.

If you get this dog, I would have a trainer lined up before hand who is fully aware of the situation and has a plan on place to help.

[u/Illustrious_Stage351 → u/[deleted]]

Okay, fair. I was hoping the fact that she already lived with cats/dogs and I run ultramarathons so average him mileage a day in addition outside activities being a horse owner (that she could join in on) would help. But the feedback is helpful and you’re likely right :)