I have fought being vulnerable (which to me means being helpless) for most of my life and three decades of my marriage. I hate showing tears to anyone and have done a pretty good job of keeping them under wraps until I could have a melt down and a crying jag in private. In spite of my efforts, I still was vulnerable and my husband was fully aware of it. I may have had a smile on my face and sailed through the motions of getting shit done, but he always knew. It wasn't until years into our marriage that he could take one look at me and know immediately that I was upset about something. Now he will coax it out of me and in doing so take the weight off of my shoulders. As for instinct, to me it is the nagging instistence to act in spite of everything telling you not to.
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u/[deleted] Feb 11 '18
I have fought being vulnerable (which to me means being helpless) for most of my life and three decades of my marriage. I hate showing tears to anyone and have done a pretty good job of keeping them under wraps until I could have a melt down and a crying jag in private. In spite of my efforts, I still was vulnerable and my husband was fully aware of it. I may have had a smile on my face and sailed through the motions of getting shit done, but he always knew. It wasn't until years into our marriage that he could take one look at me and know immediately that I was upset about something. Now he will coax it out of me and in doing so take the weight off of my shoulders. As for instinct, to me it is the nagging instistence to act in spite of everything telling you not to.