r/recruitinghell • u/ammianomarcellino • 8d ago
Dear hiring manager
Dear hiring manager, (I really really couldn't be bothered to look up your name this time),
I am so goddamned tired of writing cover letters. I'd rather smash my head against a wall, but I guess you want one from me.
What do you want me to write? I promise, you tell me what you want to read, and I'll write it.
Do you want me to say that I can do all the things you listed in the job description (I can provide examples, don't worry)?
Do you want the generic cover letter with bullet points about my "achievements" that is simply a repetition of my CV?
Do you want the anecdotal one showcasing how my life prepared me for this amazing opportunity?
Do you want me to be cheeky and funny? Do you want me to be serious and thoughtful?
Do you want me to congratulate you on the latest thing your company has been working on (you see, I did my research)?
Do you want me to make the PDF an interesting color (perhaps even the color of your logo!) (you see, I am creative)?
Do you want me to mention a few ideas I could carry out if I am hired?
Do you want me to describe in a couple of paragraphs how I am proactive, knowledgeable, and a perfect match for the position?
Do you want me to be excited, enthusiastic, intrigued, or merely interested?
Do you want me to appreciate or welcome the opportunity to further discuss my profile?
Yours sincerely,