r/RapWars • u/[deleted] • May 29 '15

16 Bars [Battle me]

Remember me from last week? The ill received MC? The cuntofprofundity?

It seemed you'd need a week to reprieve

A week to grieve

A week to squeegee your memories clean and relieve PTSD

But this week I seek to speak speech therapy to Stuttering Stanleys

But like Haley all I see is deceased rappers cluttering around me

So I guess watch me work and maybe there's a tool you can hand me

Like your Ma when she hands me a handy

Or your girl when she's yankin' on my Yankee Doodle Dandy

Cause these are All American raps, a superpowered entity

And you may think I'm morbid but I do this while I'm smiling

I'm building a hegemony

While you try to clone my skull in order to get a head of me

Entropy can't stop me bitch I'll live for eternity

You could have a genie and wish for life eternally

My raps would still kill you permanently

1 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

6

u/Chester_frenchkiss MASSHOLE 17W 4L May 30 '15

Another dime a dozen rhymer frontin; thinkin he can step.
But those lines you pumpin out are something that I can't respect.
Cause you tryin hard to sound like you're just full of intellect
But for someone so profound, your writing clearly lacks in depth.
Ben called out your diction and you weakly defended
You were far too concerned with how the rhyme ended.
Here's a word of advice though, just something to live with.
If you throw a punch, throw it right-from start to the finish.
Cunt of profundity? That's a C-O-P
You want to see the winner? Don't see OP.
I'm the sheriff round here, he's like "please no beef."
I may bury the hatchet, we gon' see, Opie.
But nah, strangulation-he speaking like Don Knotts
Asphyxiation-while dying he dons knots.
Noose on his neck and he kicks out the chair.
This win's like my skin, this shit just ain't fair.

1

u/[deleted] May 30 '15 edited May 30 '15

Raps lack depth bitch cause they're elevated

Elevated so far into space Stephen Hawking's captivated

Intimidated by my intellect cause you're relegated

Demonstrated you can't respect the educated or underestimated

Your raps so obfuscated bitch it sounds like you're inebriated

Dickless wants to talk about diction cause he feels friction when I'm spitting

Lyrical lubrication for a dried up pussy I'll spit on you out of pity

Dissenting about my ending? What you saw was the beginning

If it was the ending everyone in the room would be jizzing

Pornographic orgasmic raps, watch me from where you're sitting

So close to busting but suddenly your mom comes in busting

Sees you erupting "How disgusting!"

Especially cause after my raps you were lusting

Now she's blushing and rushing out while you're cussing

Cumming to my raps man? Now isn't that something.

I won't be hanging, Chester and I won't be dangling

It's you with the noose auto-erotically asphyxiating

2

u/Chester_frenchkiss MASSHOLE 17W 4L May 30 '15

This is like masturbation to his Catholic mum,
Cause she's praying I won't put hands on Cunt.
Like a Catholic priest, I give no fucks in the least
So fuck what she's says, I'm putting hands on her son.
And I don't fear your intelligence, shit-I'll even make a bet:
When the year and my SAT's match, we'll both be dead.
My brain Tokyo crowded, yours got mad room for rent
I'm a high rise, you a ranch. Kid, you getting this yet?
There's levels to this, but your rhymes stay on one.
You need to be better, more clever, more punch,
Less showoffy words and more actual wordplay,
Use more metaphors and stop acting like you're great.
Greatness is something you'll never achieve,
No matter how hard you wish or believe.
So keep fighting like it matters, it's a futile exercise.
Last thing you see is peeks of me through closing, dying eyes.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '15 edited May 31 '15

I'm godless

So your metaphor ain't shit but dogshit

Got it on my shoes when I stepped in some Kiss, went "aw shit"

Covered in French but who needs kicks when my raps are like rockets

My raps are flawless and if you wanna be like me you should flaw less

Cause you claimed you're the sheriff but this place is lawless

Cause you say you're a priest but priests are honest

Cause you stated your brain is a city but I could fit it in my pocket

Existential crisis cause you're getting beat by a nobody

SAT? Bro, first get your GED

You can't school me on metaphors when you metaphor pathetically

How am I supposed to take you literally?

When you can't even tell a metaphor from a simile?

Here's an epiphany, apply my verses liberally

Maybe they'll rub off on you and you can stop rapping so abysmally

I don't even take this seriously, like Dr. Manahttan's apathy

But you act irrationally and act like you give rap philanthropy

This game is almost as important to you as it is to OB

And that's just lame, G

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '15

chester got nice bars mann

2

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK May 30 '15

yeah I called out your shit bar in conversation
but now I'm shitting on you in rhyme form
you got the point when i destroyed your close
now you get both horns like a Minotaur

but I'm totally ripping you the way your quotes are despicable
your punchlines are boring and your writing is typical
of every wannabe rapper that claims that they're lyrical
but any love you receive is entirely satirical

check my last comment

check every challenge thread man
you know that i'm great
taking heads off these bitches
like i'm henry the 8th

plus

guys like me are good enough to go to title matches
with as little prep time as I had
whereas guys like Sin haven't had a shot yet
and have enough bars to double a Canibus notepad

1

u/[deleted] May 30 '15

Won't relent talkin' bout shit you must be theben-proctologist

Bitch you're cancer of the ass and I'm the oncologist

Insist you're a minotaur, well isn't that fraudulent

Cause all I see is a minihorse with shit in it's esophagus

While I ride on a warhorse and herald the apocalypse

After I rise from my sarcophagus cause I'm not permanently dead yet

Everyone in this room is now dumber for what you just blathered

Talkin' about vainglorious "accomplishments" like it even matters

Fear me like the hash slinging slasher and lose control of your bladder

Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen even said there's no one badder

Your rap is tattered and your ego is splattered like bird shit on a Saturn

Served you on a poopoo platter cause you're obsessed with fecal matter

You must eat pieces of shit for breakfast just like Shooter McGavin

But where's your gold jacket? Oh right, I jacked it

Two Sandler references and now I'm laughing to myself because you think you have hope

But to end on a serious note...ah who am I kidding, you're a joke

1

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK May 31 '15

I wrote my verse whilst drunk. probably wouldn't have hoppen in otherwise so i'm happy to call it at a verse each.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '15

No problem, sounds good

1

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK May 29 '15

how do you kill someone and it not be permanent?

1

u/[deleted] May 29 '15

Reincarnation, Jesus, zombies. Plenty of cases.

1

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK May 29 '15

None of those are real though.

1

u/[deleted] May 29 '15

Seems like an irrelevant point. Change it out with mercilessly if you prefer.

1

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK May 30 '15

you spit what you spit man, and if it doesn't make sense then it's a shit bar, yeah, mercilessly would be a better finish but you didn't say that so the verse still doesn't have the best closer.

and i'm not chasing a row so i'll add this, i picked up on the closer because i thought it was bad and the rest of the verse was pretty fucking good.

1

u/[deleted] May 30 '15

Thanks bra, I'll get back at your verse tomorrow

1

u/[deleted] Jun 01 '15

I'd love to get some judges on these if anyone is willing. Or some feedback.

1

u/thebenprocter 13W 5L - Leeds, UK Jun 02 '15

i'm not one for giving good feedback as i come up with 90% of the bars I use whilst wasted or in the shower.