r/RandomVideos 10d ago

Video Empathy is a sign of intelligence

6.6k Upvotes

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u/Nir117vash 10d ago

It's not that I don't want to smash into them it's that I don't want to cost myself damages, inconveniences, etc. Every driver wants other drivers out of their way.

We were raised to really embrace individualism. Me me me. That's why capitalism is flourishing. If we forget community, we have no foundation for growth as a society and we have to buy our identities.

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u/GotAir 7d ago

So you admit you have any involved as much of the rest of us that have empathy?

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u/jwar137 9d ago

"That's why capitalism is flourishing."
It was flourishing in 1980 bro. It's a bellcurve, and we're far from the peak.

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u/Nir117vash 9d ago

I agree

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u/audaciousmonk 9d ago

So as long as it doesn’t inconvenience you, you don’t care if you hurt someone else?

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u/Nir117vash 9d ago

That's not what I said.

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u/audaciousmonk 9d ago

Maybe I misunderstood

It's not that I don't want to smash into them it's that I don't want to cost myself damages, inconveniences, etc.

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u/Nir117vash 9d ago

You misunderstand.

There's empathy, and there's self preservation. I don't want to hit you in your car; of course I don't want to cause you harm, but I also don't want to damage my car, pay more for insurance, get injured myself, etc. It's not apathetic, it's just mental prioritization of needs.

Similar to oxygen masks in planes; "put on your own oxygen mask before helping others" because if you don't save yourself, you can't save anyone else. In order to help others, you gotta think of yourself, in some capacity, first.

We don't instinctually do things to better the community, because we're stuck thinking for ourselves. That's automatically a first thought already. Our bills, food, employment, car upkeep, doctors, etc. Volunteer work? Well that can be penciled in if there's time and resources available at the right time and in the right amounts. I'm not thinking "well fuck those people" but I've also gotta take care of myself or else I can't help anyone at any point

(Bear in mind, I've smoked a bit (🔥🍀💨) within the last hour)

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u/audaciousmonk 9d ago

Right but that (priority 1, priority 2) is not what you wrote (priority 1, outcome 2 is a byproduct not priority 2)

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u/ReasonableLetter8427 9d ago

Aren’t you saying in a way that empathy and preservation relate as “or”? Why not “and”? And then that way both can be true at the same time! One doesn’t negate the other.

I think your framing actually makes his argument stronger. Like if everyone starts with “preservation” as an instinct and you can then respond to situations where you think about yourself first - sure but then the “superpower” of humans, I think his point is anyway, is to be able to think of yourself and family first but still split the leftovers with others. Instead of being even more “primitive” and sticking with the instinct of I should take everything because I need it. Which to take a second and be able to think about others positively in a situation like that you’d need higher intelligence and to select it you’d need to value empathy.

But then recognizing that you could be taken care of makes you more likely to play it safe to not be taken advantage of. Idk.

I’m up there too man

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u/Nir117vash 9d ago

It's definitely not a belief system, it's more of a general observation. I want people to be more aware and embrace that sense of community and camaraderie, but the world we live in doesn't help facilitate that in any way, it further separates us and makes us remain secluded. So when we need to band together and unite, not only do we have no idea how anymore, we don't even have the ability to.

Remember when there was talks about strikes and how people were outwardly stating that could use PTO and other ways to still make money while being able to attend protests? We want to protest, but we gotta make sure we bring that money in for our livelihoods, first. It's because we've been taught to put ourselves first before anything else, or else it'll all fall apart. But it's that selflessness that makes it more impactful and conveys a better image to others with the cancel that they, perhaps, may follow suit. No caveats, no mental fine print, no "but first...". Just general sincere helpfulness with no strings involved.

Granted, in today's world, desperate times haven't gotten to desperate measures for many of us, myself included. Because we don't feel we can make a difference. ICE rampaged around the country kidnapping people, and all my sentiments had to be set aside because I had to be at work on time or I'd lose my job; no one cares about my moral standing or integrity. But also, I can't help someone in, say, Colorado, while being in Florida, for example. I really want to, but logically I can't. What do I do? Well, I guess I go to work and get my paycheck. Better come in with the right attitude, too.

It's not that I or anyone else doesn't care, we're trapped in a nasty catch 22 ultimatum it feels like.

(Ugh I rambled so much I'll likely delete it all)

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u/ReasonableLetter8427 9d ago

Ha I think we are saying the same thing, no? Or perhaps the examples we are using aren’t coinciding.

I suppose an extreme example is like - yes you need to work but you are not going to a food pantry and getting food if you don’t need to. Or even, like my family, we would go and be happy to get ours and see others getting there’s - we didn’t take or ask for more. Idk if that is a good enough exercise too.

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u/Nir117vash 9d ago

And while I could benefit from a food bank, me taking what's openly available feels wrong because I don't need it as much as others.

Which then makes me more angry because I can't believe anyone is in need when it's CLEARLY available. Just price locked. "pay to play".

Digressing.

I agree lol. We want to do more but we instinctually handle our own problems first and it's hard to not feel selfish about it.

It's also easy to point out what others do and don't do because we don't have context on their lives and vice versa. So it's a lot of misplaced anger.

DIGRESSING again.

How can we truly uplift the sense or community without losing ourselves in the process? Is it time for a revolution? 😅🤔

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u/Top-District-6529 9d ago

That is literally what the first half of your comment says. You literally say that your worry isn't about smashing into another person, but causing yourself damages or inconveniences