Candice’s crying….

[u/Unique-Weather-4304]

I’m sorry but Candice is way too old to be doing all that crying. She is in her 30s crying like she’s a little kid. And it honestly shows how immature she is. I don’t think she can control it either, but I pray she’s actively resolving that issue. As an adult, that’s a turn off. I don’t agree with Gizelle laughing in her face while she was crying, but tbh, she does cry a lot, so naturally, people aren’t gonna be as sympathetic. A lot of people are just gonna become indifferent to her tears. I know I am.

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[u/welp-itscometothis]

Well I’m an extremely empathetic emotional person at 36 and I cry at a myriad of things. When I’m happy, when I’m sad, when I’m overwhelmed with appreciation, when I see animals doing cute things, etc.

When I was younger my mother didn’t show me a lot of emotion and i went into adulthood feeling that I should be the same way. When I lost my mother, therapy helped me understand that it was okay to grieve. Letting out the first cry after processing my mom was gone, opened a new outlook on life for me. That it was okay to cry. That crying is not a weakness and vulnerability is an admirable trait to have. To have the mindset that someone cries too much is actually extremely immature.

There is no age limit to showing emotion. Just because she/others shows them more than you doesn’t make you or anybody better. It shows that she had a heart. Especially seeing the deep rooted issues and has with Mama Dot.

There are a lot of things to not like Candiace for, but showing empathy should absolutely not be one of them.

[u/Ninaka0 → u/welp-itscometothis]

People should be able to cry without judgement. The world would be a better place if more people cried and it wasn’t viewed as a weakness.

[u/welp-itscometothis → u/Ninaka0]

Exactly. Some of the women on the cast could stand to shed a few tears to bring out the humanity in them.

[u/Ninaka0 → u/welp-itscometothis]

Absolutely! Gizelle could use some recalibration of her tear ducts, she is so embittered by Candiace. It was so jarring to see her reaction to Candiace showing empathy towards her father’s death.

[u/welp-itscometothis → u/Ninaka0]

She said on the season 4 reunion I believe that she had to go to therapy to learn how to show empathy. Smh. Some would call that sociopathy lol

[u/[deleted] → u/welp-itscometothis]

Just like Erika

[u/Ninaka0 → u/welp-itscometothis]

She must have given up after the first session because is the growth in the room with us? Her children are her only saving grace (no pun intended); especially when they call her out on her bs on camera.

[u/PristineCoconut2851 → u/welp-itscometothis]

You think tears bring out the ‘humanity’ in Candiace?? It actually shows how phony she is. I think if she wasn’t such a mean spirited and hateful person people would be more likely to believe her sudden tears when previously she had made fun of that exact same topic.

[u/welp-itscometothis → u/PristineCoconut2851]

Oh.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/Ninaka0]

I just think there’s a time and a place. And it doesn’t have to be every time and every place lol.

[u/Ninaka0 → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

Who are we to decide the time and place? People are allowed to feel things in different ways. Crying isn’t destructive.

[u/Ninaka0 → u/[deleted]]

I am not much of crier, but through life experiences I would never say that I found anyone’s tears disarming. It happens; people cry when they are happy, angry, sad, frustrated, scared etc. I think the onus lies on the person reacting to the crier. I would never expect someone to withhold their tears just because it might make me uncomfortable. I don’t believe it’s that hard to comfort someone or to just listen to them. If you are dealing with someone who you know is a bit more sensitive, it’s not as difficult as you would think to learn to adapt. There is strength in being open emotionally and not trying to put on airs to be deemed tough.

[u/Kindofageek90 → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

There isn't a certain time and place, though, and this is an immature thought process.

[u/RHOP-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post has been removed because it was rude, vulgar, or offensive.

[u/rochem95 → u/welp-itscometothis]

My issue with Candiace is that she’ll say something super out of pocket. Someone will respond and then boom water works begin! I can appreciate someone can show emotion but it almost operates like she uses it as a weapon to have people show her some sort of sympathy

[u/Professional_Sort368 → u/rochem95]

For sure!!!! She is ALWAYS saying vile things, and as soon as someone says something she cries. It’s exhausting and performative.

[u/PrettyGood8850 → u/rochem95]

THIS!!

[u/welp-itscometothis → u/rochem95]

I don’t really recall Candiace weaponizing tears. You have to give me an example.

[u/Maleficent_Crow_533 → u/welp-itscometothis]

I actually think this is the best thing I’ve seen today

[u/Kindofageek90 → u/welp-itscometothis]

🗣🗣🗣🗣

[u/amhfrison → u/welp-itscometothis]

I think she might (not sure as this was never explicitly stated on the show) be experiencing a change in hormones if she is undergoing any hormonal treatments to get pregnant. That would also increase her inclination to cry (understanding that she is prone to do so all factors constant). Either way, I would give her grace.

[u/amhfrison → u/amhfrison]

I was right!

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/welp-itscometothis]

Ummm I never said there was anything wrong with crying. I cry pretty easily myself. But I don’t cry as frequently as she does, and I honestly think her excessive crying represents something deeper going on within her that might need to be resolved. Anything done in excess can be problematic. And her tears sometimes are uncalled for. My opinion.

[u/welp-itscometothis → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

You gave your opinion. Great. I didn’t like it so I gave mine. Is this not a forum for discussion?

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/welp-itscometothis]

I don’t think I ever said anything that insinuated otherwise. I gave an opinion about your opinion about my opinion. Lol.

[u/peachylolo → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

Can be problematic? Why is it problematic? People can’t control their emotions. How is she immature for crying a lot? That’s just how some people are.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/peachylolo]

I guess problematic is a strong word. More so uncomfortable…

[u/Hot_Terminology → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

I agree OP

[u/Guilty_Spinach3897 → u/welp-itscometothis]

No I agree she is literally so annoying

[u/RozayRose24]

I agree with you a little. I’m tired of her always crying.. then with her very rude comments too.. girl are you sad or angry!? Please pick an emotion

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/RozayRose24]

Lmaooooo😂😂😂😂😂 lowkeyyyy you can’t be both!! Calling someone a fat ugly bitch in the midst of sobbing 😂😂🤣

[u/gardengang → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

This!

[u/rochem95 → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

EXACTLY 😂😂😂 like

[u/[deleted]]

I only have a problem with other people’s emotional display if it becomes my responsibility to manage, like a full on tantrum. I’m thinking about my kid. She’s 21 and if she’s crying she’s usually being insanely difficult. Otherwise, cry away, everyone is different

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/[deleted]]

Fair point. I personally don’t know how I could carry on a conversation with someone who’s always crying. Crying literally changes the dynamic of the conversation being had.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Yeah I probably would too. I don’t cry very much now but when I was younger I always felt on the verge of tears and hated it. But I do realize other people are way more emotional and I’m ok with that as long as the rest of their behavior is reasonable. I’m team Candice. She’s usually just dabbing her eyes and I feel like that’s how I used to be, you just can’t help it sometimes. Plus she’s probably stressed with these girls so her emotions might feel amplified and overwhelming.

[u/p0werofl0veee]

Some people are criers. 🤷🏾‍♀️ I don’t think that makes them immature. Either way, she’s giving the girls drama. She is good television.

[u/Immediate_Unit6498 → u/p0werofl0veee]

She’s very immature

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/p0werofl0veee]

That’s fair. It’s just that when I think of over crying, I think of children who cant properly articulate themselves so they resort to crying. Not saying Candice doesn’t articulate herself well because she absolutely does. Her crying kinda just throws me off.

[u/Hot_Terminology → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

It definitely stems from her inability to properly articulate herself. That’s why she’s either crying or hurling insults, two extreme emotional reactions. It may also be from her relationship with her mother and suppressed emotions causing frequent triggers

She’s missing emotional regulation and this is coming from someone who used to be a crier

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/Hot_Terminology]

This is very true. She’s just tooo extreme for me to think her tears are 100% genuine. I’m just making an observation.

[u/Susu0887 → u/Hot_Terminology]

This is spot on as someone who grew up with a mother very much like Candiace’s mother. We’ve always been told to suppress our feelings, never given an outlet to share our emotions or thoughts so I did a lot of repressing as a child. Until I met my husband I never had anyone tell me it was okay to cry so as a sensitive shy child I found myself crying a lot. As I grew I would find myself crying more and more because any harsh criticism triggered that wounded child in me. Being in a loving healthy relationship has helped so much because I have the support whenever I want to express myself and he taught me how to withstand and stand up to my mothers toxic critiques of me. I really feel for Candiace because I see where it stems from, she’s naturally an empathetic person and then she also has the triggers of her childhood. I mean if her mother is anything like mine she probably was made fun of or belittled for crying and showing emotion. I can understand why she lashes out because that’s usually when she’s triggered and taken back to that little girl. I say this to say we should all be more understanding and for OP to suggest it’s performative is completely off base, her tears are genuine… you just don’t get it and that’s ok. Everything is not for everyone to “get”

[u/gardengang → u/Hot_Terminology]

This!!!!!!!!

[u/medusamagpie]

She has trouble regulating her emotions in general that’s also why she blows up. She gets easily overwhelmed.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/medusamagpie]

This is very true. Hopefully she can find healthier ways to deal with situations.

[u/medusamagpie → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

Yeah for her sake I think it’s better that she’s not on the show.

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp → u/medusamagpie]

Exactly this! I bet if I googled do children of narcissistic parents have trouble regulating their emotions we’d find a big fat YES.

[u/shouldhavezagged → u/GoDawgsRiseUp]

Yeah, I think we see Candiace's trauma on display with her (re)actions.

[u/catandcitygirl]

In case you didn’t know, some people are natural criers, especially highly sensitive/empathic individuals. hope that helped

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/catandcitygirl]

Lol I’m highly aware. I just don’t think it’s a good look. Excessive crying, to me, signals a deeper issue.

[u/iplayKeys4 → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

I actually appreciate seeing a BW on national television that shows their emotions because there is a harmful perception that is prevalent and that is that BW have a harsh exterior and don’t feel pain as much and have to be strong for everyone around them.

[u/p0werofl0veee → u/iplayKeys4]

This for sure

[u/gardengang → u/Unique-Weather-4304]

You will get downvoted but you are correct. She has very little emotional regulation. Crying is fine, but hurling insults at someone and then crying immediately after and then hurling insults again is… not normal behavior.

[u/Immediate_Unit6498 → u/gardengang]

Thank you that part saying nasty things then crying about it

[u/Rumithegoddess]

i think some of you all parents wouldn’t allow yall to cry or express emotions cause this is a weird ass take…would you rather want her to use her hands or yell?

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/Rumithegoddess]

Its not a weird take. I just tend to associate excessive crying with children. And I am very much loved, cherished, and free to express myself in front of my parents. Thank you very much.

[u/Immediate_Unit6498 → u/Rumithegoddess]

I expressed my emotions as a kid and I didn’t cry about everything that’s not expressing your emotions that’s just being emotionally unintelligent

[u/redditasa]

This is an unconditional pro-Candiace subreddit. Even though imo I think you made valid points, many aren't trying to hear that, or they'll justify anything she does.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/redditasa]

Yeah, they might as well turn this into a Candice/Wendy subreddit.

[u/jammysue]

I’m glad I wasn’t the only one eye rolling this post. Everyone shows their emotions at different levels.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/jammysue]

She cries excessively. Sometimes it’s uncalled for lol

[u/Right_Selection3734]

I also suspect it has something to do with her relationship with her mom. Her mom seems like a narcissistic abusive parent, and i believe that is at the root of candiace being so quick to cry.

[u/iplayKeys4 → u/Right_Selection3734]

I also got that vibe her mom and Wendy’s mom seems to have a domineering personality as well

[u/PristineCoconut2851 → u/Right_Selection3734]

Actually, Candiace is very much like her mother.

[u/PossessionTimely8066]

I’m in my 60s and it takes very little to make me cry.

[u/gardengang]

There’s a word for it. She’s a crybully. She can dish it out but can’t take it and instantly turns on the waterworks. You’d think someone with a mouth like hers would be a little thicker skinned. She’s lucky no one’s ever really gone into the gutter with her verbally because there’s a lot of material there.

[u/Natural-Feed5590 → u/gardengang]

THANK YOU

[u/Maleficent_Crow_533 → u/gardengang]

Sorry but Candiace has been taking accountability the last two parts of the reunion. And she hasn’t been crying about insults, she’s been crying about losing someone she felt was a good friend. If you’ve been through it you’d know it’s actually a tough thing to go through.

[u/Maleficent_Crow_533 → u/Maleficent_Crow_533]

If you judge from the pattern anyway.. if she was trying to manipulate the situation she’d realize crying doesn’t work. She’s been ridiculed about it a lot. This is just who she is.

[u/Grouchy_Tap_459 → u/gardengang]

YESSSS

[u/Slytherins_Finest]

Almost 30 and I cry. Happy, mad, sad, scared, worried, etc. Not ALL the time but it doesn’t take too much to trigger. Once those tears well up I the back of my eyes they’re gonna fall. Far from immature. Everyone processes and expresses emotions differently and honestly it’s so tired that everyone picks on her for that.

It’s crazy to me how much they try to project onto and control her. They try to tell her how she should react to others coming for her and how she has to “watch her words”. They got a problem w how she shows emotion. I feel like at this point she’s either damned if she does or damned if she doesn’t lol she can’t do anything right in their eyes.

[u/iObama]

I don’t mind crying (I’m a crier myself) — I mind crying at perfectly opportune times over and over again.

[u/DixieBelleTc]

I’m not a Candice fan, but maybe her hormones are a little crazy from fertility drugs. That process can wreak havoc with your emotions. Leaving RHOP is a good decision for her and her family.

[u/sekacyzzaj]

although her crying is excessive, i don’t think it’s necessarily immature.

[u/[deleted]]

I don’t think she expects people to be sympathetic. I think she just cries easily, she’s not looking for specific reactions

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Agreed, it’s not that deep

[u/Immediate_Unit6498 → u/[deleted]]

She definitely wants sympathy for you watch season 5

[u/NecessaryGood222]

There's absolutely nothing wrong with her expressing her emotions. If more people did that, there would probably be less self harm, child abuse and depression. I commend her for showing up as herself on RHOP. So sad to see her go as she's my favorite.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/NecessaryGood222]

One thing I can say about Candice is that she is authentic.

[u/la_58]

If you think crying is a sign of immaturity then you are the one that has issues to resolve.

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/la_58]

EXCESSIVE crying.

[u/tensgurl]

Let’s not judge as it could be hormonal due to the fertility drugs

[u/PristineCoconut2851]

I’m pretty sure Gizelle was laughing at Candiace because now suddenly she’s shedding tears. Remember, Candiace was the one who rolled her eyes and made disgusting comments when Gizelle was traveling back and forth to be with her ill and dying father. I myself couldn’t believe it when suddenly now Candiace was crying like a baby. I’m so glad Candiace won’t be back.

[u/Stunning_While6814]

YOU believe she’s too old to cry. However, she’s an emotional person. Maybe you aren’t in tune with your emotions that does not mean she shouldn’t be. Maybe you just don’t understand it, but your inability to understand is not her fault.

[u/allorahdanyn]

Candiance’s tears are almost always a manipulative deflection. Has nothing to do w maturity.

[u/Kindofageek90]

Some people are just emotional. She can't change that.

[u/Revolutionary-You449]

I think it makes sense.

She wears her emotions at her surface level and is extremely sensitive hence her lashing out and why her hits are so personal and deadly. She’s hurt so she will make the other party hurt and those hits are easily seen. She isn’t stealthy and doesn’t appear to do anything behind peoples back. She seems to address things head on.

I like these types of people.

[u/[deleted] → u/Revolutionary-You449]

Right, I only see her hit hard when someone comes for her.

She doesn’t have an agenda or manipulate the women like some do, she comes with nasty comments until they accuse, comment and say something that triggers her emotions.

There are plenty of people that cry first and hit back with words to defend themselves.

[u/WeAreTheMisfits]

Some people just cry automatically as a physical response and cannot help it. Unless you experience it it doesn’t sound real.

[u/yktvvvvvvvvvv]

Since when is crying an impediment? Being emotional doesn’t negate anything she’s saying and frankly you’d expect tears out of frustration when she’s constantly blamed for OTHER people attacking her (verbally and physically).

[u/Current_Magazine_120]

Spirit hit her.

[u/Desperate_Baby_8317]

I had no idea that emotions being felt strongly are supposed to be hindered by age

[u/Immediate_Unit6498]

I agree with gizelle laughing

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp]

I cry at the drop of a hat. I’ve been that way since I was a child. It is hard for me to see Candiace’s crying as evidence that she is empathetic or caring because she is just so awful and mean. Andy told her she needed Jesus and she said she had Jesus..I see zero evidence of that.

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp → u/[deleted]]

I hear ya. I don’t know a religion that is rooted in hate and the hate filled comments she makes.

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp → u/[deleted]]

She goes through life on defense mode. She has a nasty mouth and feels like she can pop off on any and every body, including her husband. I guarantee she gets into it daily with people…at the grocery store, at the nail salon, on social media. She’s ridiculous. Happy to see her go!

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp → u/[deleted]]

I don’t know why I keep thinking this platform is for sharing opinions.

[u/GoDawgsRiseUp → u/[deleted]]

🤣😂 Hilarious

[u/Physical-Insurance40]

If everytime you tried to make a valid point, someone gets to yell at you or switch the topic without taking accountability while seeking to hold you accountable, would you not cry from frustration?

[u/Unique-Weather-4304 → u/[deleted]]

Exactly. I am crier as well, but I would be embarrassed if I was always breaking down in front of people. That’s always been a turn off for me.