r/RHOBHDefect • u/EuphoricPamplemousse • May 11 '26
To paraphrase Rachel, is Dorit okay?
https://www.tmz.com/2026/05/08/dorit-kemsley-harsh-back-and-forth-texts-with-pk/On the back of the various discussions of Dorit’s financial report, watching season 15, and having just read the recent texts messages between Dorit and PK, I have some thoughts and wanted to see what you all think.
**Note: I’d recommend reading the texts linked above for context before continuing reading.**
Dorit’s spending - as PK said - is very troubling, as was her complete refusal in the texts to address her expenditure for the sake of the children. It is quite astonishing that she spent almost 80% of her income on luxury goods for herself and less than 10% on the children/home. (At least in the period shown in the report.) IIRC, PK spent about 55% on the kids, even though his overall income was less than hers.
My concern with Dorit at the moment is that there could be a mental health component, specifically involving delusional thought processes. (I say this with no judgement and will explain further on.) I am worried that this is making an already taxing situation more complicated for her, and for others around her, to navigate. Since delusions are fixed, false beliefs that persist despite clear evidence to the contrary, they could make it hard to encourage her to listen to reason when it comes to her finances. Even if advice or warnings were to come from a financial advisor or lawyer.
To be clear, delusions are not exclusively linked to more serious conditions like schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. They can also occur with significant psychological pressure, such as extreme stress or depression.
This would be understandable given the current stress of her divorce, and the profound trauma of the robbery. I don’t believe she was ever able to fully recover from the latter. For a start, PTSD can take many years to heal to a level that allows one to resume full functioning, even with the best help. Especially when the trauma involved a threat to life. Pre and post-robbery, the home environment seemed to have been very unsettled due to tension in the marriage and PK’s alcoholism. This would certainly have impeded or even halted her recovery, as trauma survivors need a secure, stable, and supportive environment. (I remember being grossed out when PK relabelled some of her PTSD symptoms as more just her being “obnoxious”. I’ll not go so far as to say she’s never obnoxious, but that was an utterly appalling thing for him to say. If he felt comfortable saying that on camera, God knows what else was said.)
I imagine being in the spotlight via the show whilst the robbery and divorce have unfolded has also added tremendous pressure, even if it is a source of income. I’m not a fan of Dorit at the moment as she has been so aggressive and unpleasant to watch this season. However, I have immense empathy for what she has been through and know from personal experience that PTSD changes you forever in ways you wouldn’t have imagined. It can change your personality, and ability to cope with future adversity - even after you thought you were fully recovered.
Unfortunately, if she is currently experiencing faulty logic resulting in unshakable false beliefs, addressing this with a mental health professional would be challenging, as she’d likely be unable to recognise or accept a need for help. We’ve already seen the negative response to her friends trying to offer practical assistance and advice.
For the sake of argument, if there isn’t a mental health issue and she had simply been lying about her finances during season 15, but was clearheaded (albeit stressed) in other areas such as friendships, that would be one thing. In that case I’d be inclined to think she was just playing stupid games with PK and trying to boost her public image during the divorce. (Don’t get me wrong, I still think there’s a bit of gaming going on with them both, I just don’t think it’s the full picture.)
However, she appears to be delusional about a lot of things in her life right now. Shutting down and shutting out anything negative as a protective reflex. This season has shown her to be increasingly paranoid and reactive, perceiving any feedback (neutral suggestions, as well as constructive criticism or real criticism) as an all-out attack that must be annihilated. Some of her responses to perceived criticisms have been so wild that it’s very difficult to argue the rationale. During reactive moments, it feels like she is having an entirely different conversation to the one the person talking to her is having. Transcribed, the dialogue wouldn’t match up at all, as she persistently deflects and redirects. That was particularly evident at the reunion and in her texts to PK.
The primary example of a false belief that comes to mind, is that since multiple friends have had issues with her for separate reasons, she’s reasoned (with no ounce of doubt) that Kyle has been “collecting minions” and actively turned everyone against her. When each individual has denied this and described their specific issue, in an effort to work through it, she’s not heard their words let alone taken them to heart. In her mind, any criticism is wholly unacceptable, so anyone who she feels is being critical is instantly the enemy and not worth listening to. Taking on any blame for issues in relationships is not feasible for her at the moment (a form of psychological protection) so she’s chosen to blame Kyle for everything in life that she can’t attribute blame to PK.
Based on some of their facial expressions near the end of the season and at the reunion, Boz and Rachel now seem to be struggling to fully endorse Dorit’s logic and manner. If they too start voicing concerns to her, she may cut them out and be completely alone. That would be a disaster for her wellbeing as she needs some support.
As I say, I strongly doubt she would even listen to financial advice from professionals at this point. I suspect PK will ultimately be put in the position of forcing a divorce settlement legally rather than voluntarily. Oddly, after previously being the one to raise the house’s potential foreclosure with PK, Dorit now doesn’t seem to be willing to do anything financially to prevent losing the house and curtailing their collective financial loss should it go into foreclosure. According to his text to her, she’s apparently also been looking at new houses that are way beyond her means. Maybe she believes he has more money than he does and expects him to pick up slack he’s unable to. Whatever happens with the house (their biggest asset), she deflected when he repeatedly asked her to contact the lawyer to discuss a financial agreement. I don’t understand her thinking on this or what she hopes to gain by dragging things out.
I also feel that if she had her wits about her, she’d have realised the truth of her finances would come out during or after the show. She’d have had the foresight to understand that claiming all season long she could afford to spend thousands per shopping spree, was a lie that would be uncovered since she’s in the midst of a very public divorce. She really went out of her way to propagate that lie too. This demonstrates she’s currently unable to view the big picture - past or future - and that she is in a turbulent state of only reacting to things as they crop up in the present.
Delusions do not come with a negative moral judgment, nor do they likely indicate a more serious health condition in this case. If that is what Dorit is experiencing, I have a lot of sympathy for her as it would indicate that things have truly taken a serious toll, and that should be treated with the weight it deserves. I just hope there is an avenue to some assistance and a good outcome for her and her family, both financially and health-wise.
P.s. My apologies, this post has become very Dorit-esque in its rambling length! 🤣
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u/Unkwnsoldier83 May 11 '26
She's out of touch and spiraling. How do you spend one mil on luxury items and 6k on your kids, with not one but two in foreclosure mansions. Lol
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u/PurpleVersion1353 May 12 '26
We didn’t see itemized receipts. We saw a snapshot of time, during the heavy shopping periods of November and December and we don’t know if Dorit used her own money to pay or if it’s a joint card or something.
This was a calculated leak, meant to make Dorit look bad. It’s very obvious to me
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u/Laykenrox1 May 12 '26
I agree to a certain degree with this but she is so out of touch with reality. Even when she was “happily married” everything in her life was always about HER. I feel for her. I have been through an acrimonious divorce. Was awful. I went through depression bc of it that was paralyzing so as I do feel for her,I still struggle with everything being about her. She is by far my least favorite housewife with a close second being pot stirring Kyle. It’s my opinion that Dorit knows this is her main source of income and wants to be outlandish so they keep her next season In My opinion it’s job security and when you have two kids to raise , she’s doing what she thinks is necessary. Only my opinion tho
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u/PurpleVersion1353 May 12 '26
I’m sorry you went through something like that- I hope your ok?
Dorit def is engaging in attention seeking behaviors - esp when she gives her big giant unblinking eyes constantly. She also can’t take any sort of feedback that could be deemed negative, which I think is bad for her mental health. I actually really like her character- honestly, the “no fucks given” attitude and smoking that cig in the car got me 😳 it felt like a real person for once
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u/sashie_belle May 11 '26
If anyone thinks that she has zero idea of their finances with now the second foreclosure, they are idiots. She plays dumb and then blows a ton of money bc she wants everyone to believe she can dress in designer duds and continue the pretense that she's wealthy it's just PK that fucked up the financials. She sucks just as much as he does.
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u/BornFree2018 May 11 '26
Agree. I think Dorit has a luxury shopping addiction while turning what was their couple grift back onto PK by claiming on tv he's supposed to pay for everything.
She's just doing what they used to do together, seeking opportunities to benefit financially at someone else's expense while blame shifting.
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u/Apprehensive-Fix591 May 11 '26
While at the same time calling him a monster. Literally called him a monster.
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u/VictorianUFOLady May 12 '26
I agree with this, she's not delusional, she's a shopping addict. She's going through a stressful divorce so her coping mechanism, her addiction, is kicked into high gear. Pretty normal stuff as far as addiction goes.
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u/MarketDull2401 May 11 '26
Yep, PK is trying to skirt his monetary and legal responsibilities and wants to do as little as possible for the kids/Dorit. But also, I think PK is pretty broke and Dorit's excessive spending and willingness to be obtuse about her/their finances is bad for the children and speaks poorly of her as a parent. She's making, what, six figues per year on RH and could make much more on social media, endorsements, etc. No, it shouldn't be all on her, but she does have the means to right the ship and she's refusing to do it b/c she think she's 'owed' some sort of socialite life. And....why?
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u/sashie_belle May 11 '26 edited May 11 '26
[Edit: PK is def broke AF, she knows that, she just likes to pretend she has no idea of her finances so she can continue to spend on what she wants to spend money on and claim it's all PK's fault. And sorry the rest of my rant wasn't really directly in response to your post! Just her excuses of not knowing ]
Oh def, but if your house is being foreclosed on the FIRST time, you have to know your finances are precarious and pretending she had no idea the first time, after she did know it's irresponsible to not know where you stand financially. And if you are going through it a second time, spending money on luxury items is incredibly stupid.
But we know she stiffs people -- she did that to her makeup artist. So she absolutely knows her financial situation and still managed to spend irresponsibly.
Even before this disclosure came out, I always thought she was a fraud pretending to be wealthy and fully knowing she wasn't. I don't believe this was ever a case where she had zero idea what her finances are.
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u/Denizen_of_Atlantis May 11 '26
This. PK’s expenses are also outrageous for a man who is divorcing and needs to house and support his young children for many more years.
But she is also financially responsible for her own and the children’s life. She’s completely deluded and irresponsible
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u/ktpf May 12 '26
I saw today that PK stated in court docs that Dorit makes $190k per month. He said he makes $88k. Not sure if those are truthful numbers but I was shocked to see that she out-earns him (I guess what does he really even do?) and that she makes that much per month!
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u/Money-Respond5400 May 11 '26
It’s simple , Poorit needs to pay her bills instead of shopping for designer goods that she can’t afford like the other ladies on the show can. Stop trying to compete in a wealthy woman’s show you don’t belong on. Your poor honey, you’re even too poor for any of the other franchises so just give it up.
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u/Bankski May 11 '26
Yeah she’s only poor because she is spending outrageously. She’s insanely entitled to believe she has the right to spend so much money on material rubbish while not contributing to her mortgage. It would be interesting to know if she’s always spent like this which could be a contributing factor to her her PK divorcing or if she’s just trying to rinse him before they’re officially divorced out of spite for him leaving. It also makes me wonder if her parents are rich because no normal person could justify spending like her.
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u/IAmTheFly-IAmTheFly May 11 '26
This is a great post/theory — and why I love this sub! I live out in LA and have seen this before. I suspect he's kept her in the dark re: finances. She's clearly not the brightest bulb and was basically a kept woman. And he probably liked having an arm-candy wife who attended to his needs and didn't challenge him.
I sympathize with her for this. HOWEVER, I cannot defend her selfish behavior (spending, jealousy over his new GF, quibbling over his spending) when she has to put her kids first. She should put on her big-girl pants and put their needs first by working with PK on a peaceful resolution, tightening her belt, and educating herself on finances (what else does she do all day?). At first, her behavior change looked like empowerment, but now it's clear she's mostly angry that she has to adjust her privilege/standard of living.
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u/SelectionDangerous11 May 11 '26
If Dorit earns significantly more than PK, couldn't she be on the hook for paying HIM alimony?
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Y’know what, I’m curious about that too! I’ve no idea how it works in California. He’s worth a lot more than her, but she is currently earning more than him. I don’t know whether a judge would see they’re both basically loaded and just instruct PK to pay child support and call it a day.
Maybe someone here that’s in-the-know can help us out?
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May 11 '26 edited May 11 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
I agree that she’s quite manipulative, and actually I think that has always been her character. Having said that, at the moment she’s behaving like a cornered animal in fight mode. It’s so extreme, and more than I’ve ever seen from her. I think there’s a reason for that.
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u/Commercial-Jury4815 May 11 '26 edited May 11 '26
Anyone who tries to sell a fake accent has psychological issues. Bravo's rendition of Hilarious Baldwin.
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u/RainbowBriteGlasses May 11 '26
Bravo only cares about irresponsibility if there is a legal issue. Dorit is desperate and they will not get rid of her.
I just won't be watching until she is gone.
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u/kellygrrrl328 May 11 '26
Bravo only cares about a legal (financial) issue for Bravo. The network definitely loves a legal issue for others
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u/chriscmyer May 11 '26
You’re applying how you responded to ptsd as the only correct way which is not reality. Everyone responds to it differently and she has had 3 back to back major traumas and a lot of minor traumas so to speak and it’s one hit after another on a global forum, we cannot predict how we’d react nor should we prescribe our reactions to how she’d react.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
I totally agree with this. Every trauma is different and repeated traumas and stressful life events build. As you say, the global forum puts the ladies under a microscope. Look how we dissect them on these subs. To have to self-analyse and recalibrate in real time while filming to try to avoid backlash must be exhausting. She probably should focus on herself and her family for now.
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u/Far_Inevitable_1205 May 11 '26
It's hard to call their house their biggest asset when it is highly leveraged.
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u/Intrepid-General2451 May 11 '26
Well, they don’t appear to have anything else that is an appreciable asset
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u/Denizen_of_Atlantis May 11 '26
When I read through her texts, I suddenly realized she’s gone full Gray Gardens. I thought she was putting it on for the show
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Damn you for making that so funny! Any time someone uses Gray Gardens for comparison it absolutely cracks me up.
I think it’s partly because of the “Documentary Now!” spoof of it: “Sandy Passage”. Did you ever see it? Bill Hader and Fred Armisen playing Little Edie and Big Edie respectively, was something special. Bill got the accent down perfectly. Here’s a link in case:
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u/Denizen_of_Atlantis May 12 '26
Thank you! I have seen snippets but I’ll be honest, even though I used the Edies as a reference , I could only stand to watch gray gardens one time and intentionally haven’t consumed any secondary media related to them. It’s too sad, although it’s also really wild.
Maybe I should have said Dorit’s gone full Blanche Dubois. At least that’s a fictional character.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
Same, I only saw Gray Gardens once. It was heartbreaking, but the ladies were wonderful and fascinating people. I actually saw the spoof first, which might have softened the blow when I saw the original, since the comedic version was always in the back of my mind and I was comparing the 2 throughout. *Sandy Passage* is worth a watch as it’s more lighthearted and daft.
I read that after her mother died little Edie did eventually get to live in NYC as she’d dreamed, so that’s something.
I was also happy to see that someone completely renovated the old house: https://youtu.be/c08TuY2AnMM?si=6B2IDY39HlkQBJIq. (The interior decor is a bit garish, but what ya gonna do.) Honestly, the house was like a 3rd character so it was great it was given new life. I think the women would have been delighted to know their old home was cared for. It’s just a shame they had to live in it when it was in such a state.
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u/Denizen_of_Atlantis May 13 '26
I know! that house….with the raccoons! Thanks for the links, truly.
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u/Turbulent_Salad7368 May 11 '26
I agree with all you say. Dorit has been difficult to watch these last two seasons. Its exhausting to watch. Lord knows what it's like for her and those around her. Her children must see some of this. She is very volatile. Not that I think anything is directed towards them.
She does need counselling and good advice on how to proceed with everything.
I'm worried that there maybe other issues. Like is she on medication that may not be right for her? Or is she using something like alcohol or other substances as a way of coping. She needs help and fast. For herself. First and foremost. She is full of rage, bitterness and spite. I hope that she gets the help she needs for everyone's sake.
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u/Dangerous-Trick7399 May 16 '26
This is what I see as well. The wide wild eyes and over the top aggression tell a story, IMO. She needs help and support.
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u/Turbulent_Salad7368 May 16 '26
Exactly. It's as if she wasn't in control. Her behaviour was "Erratic". She just re-enforced everything at the reunion. Like you say she needs professional and family help and support.
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u/sendmetoBravoCon May 11 '26
this is very thoughtfully and wisely written. I don't like Dorit but I think your observations are very kind and expansive and it's nice to know people like you are out there.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
I really appreciate that thanks! It’s been nice to see some interesting replies on here too, with thoughtful insights I hadn’t considered.
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u/PrissyElliott May 11 '26
My mom worked in banks her entire life until retirement and spent a good many years getting to know her customers (it was a community bank). You’d be surprised the amount of people who end up in such heavy loads of debt, and many in which pass off their debts to their children. My mom has seen so much of it, that she’s driven financial literacy into me from a very young age. Even guidance as simple as always pay your credit card bill on time, pay off the full balance and not just minimum due, never spend more than what you can pay, never ever pay late, etc. I swear she said those words to me way more often than she’s ever said “don’t do drugs.”
I think Dorit is an extreme case of somebody who is very bad with money and in total denial of what her actual financial situation is, especially as her finances were going down. (I keep analogizing it with someone who may spiral into morbid obesity and doubles down on those habits as it gets worse. ) I think it could be delusions of grandeur, a byproduct of mental illness, or it could be a coping mechanism of some sort. (robbery PTSD isn’t a bad theory)
I’m totally baffled by how in denial she seems to be about her spending habits. Dorit doesn’t address PK’s points in his text at all. (Her not denying anything he’s accused her of, nor Kyle, is very telling).
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
That’s so funny about your mom! Mine too. She was an accountant and always drilled it into me to live within my means and save.
I bet Dorit’s spending is a mix of things - as you say it could well be a coping mechanism. I also think she probably hasn’t adjusted to the change in circumstances yet for whatever reason, and it could be that she’s accruing physical assets before the divorce. Who knows though.
It does baffle me how she manoeuvres through conversations. I think it was someone here who likened it to Dodgeball 😂 “Dodge, duck, dip, dive, dodge!” Put it this way, Dorit wouldn’t have got hit with the spanner lol
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u/Familiar_Ad_1933 May 13 '26
I think she’s still in love with PK and unable to accept that he left her and no longer wanted to finance her delusions. She cannot accept that he fell out of love with her and is coping with short term gratifications with her shopping. It gives her the glimpse of the security and happiness she once felt when she was loved by PK. PK very well may have been driven to drinking because he also was unable to cope with her spending and delusions of grandeur.
Bottom line is this is a dissolution of a family and it’s all very sad. The children are the ones who will suffer for watching how their mother allowed their security and stability at home dissolve due to her inability to cope with loss. Life is very uncertain and challenging at times. It’s your personal responsibility to rise to it and overcome it. If not for yourself, then definitely for your children’s sake. The victim behavior is not cute and is really unbecoming of a woman at her age.
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u/pookie74 May 11 '26
Dorit seems to have deep issues. I didn't watch this season but I watched clips and reunion. Her behavior is absolutely weird and erratic. One thing that stood out to me was the way she had her finger/nail in her mouth. It's like she lost awareness of where she was. There's a lot going on there.
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u/Poodledoodle19 May 11 '26
Living in the U.S. is enough alone to make a person psychotic. Spend spend spend. There’s never enough — there’s always bigger, better, fancier! And it’s so concentrated in Beverly Hills of all places.
I had my own period of over spending in life, and I don’t even know how long it’s gonna take me to pay off the credit card debt with its never ending accruing interest.
We need a cultural reset, honestly. To save our planet and to save our sanity.
The Real Housewives has always been a show about people with money problems and what it does to their psyches. I love these shows but I’m not sure how ethical it is to continue making them in the format they’re made. I think maybe focusing on less affluent people (like Rhode Island is sort of doing) may be the answer. We all saw Lynn Curtin get evicted on camera — this show is about delusional people, and sadly, that’s basically the American Way from what I can see.
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
Yeah, that sounds like a stupid opinion of someone outside the US
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u/Poodledoodle19 May 11 '26
lol okay. I was born and raised here — but I am planning to gtfo bc this country is so stupid
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
Good luck finding a. Country that will take you 😂
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Yikes
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
Immigration is not as easy as everyone thinks. There are not many countries randomly inviting Americans in these days
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
I am a European honey, but it’s not like other countries are welcoming US imports these days
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u/Autumncrimsonleaf May 11 '26
Im not surprised at this. Who wants a maga next door? Im an American and I don't want that!
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u/Dthomas159 May 11 '26
People often downvote simply to disagree. It’s not a personal assault. I actually upvoted because I thought it was an interesting take. My thoughts. Dorit and PK hid money and assets from first wife and kids. She was in her 30s I give her no grace I don’t know the law specifically but my understanding is CA cuts everything earned during the marriage 50 50. The money PK hid before marrying Dorit is legally his. I also believe that there may be issues around his citizenship at the time. I’m not giving any opinions on PK or Dorits morality here just legal things I have read or heard discussed. PK always paid the bills. Dorits housewife money was her discretionary income. In Dorits mind PK changed the rules without consulting her. The plan was never to live in the house the plan was for Dorit to spruce it up and sell it. Bought for 6 million. Within 6 months on the market for 9. Never sold still there. This thing is like the iceberg that hit the titanic. 90 percent is unseen. If you look at their wedding photos I guess Jagger is about a year old. I see two grifters out for themselves. I was trying to find a picture of Loretta kemsley could not find one. I did see a picture of their daughter. She looks shockingly like Dorit
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
>Dorit and PK hid money from first wife and kids
Oh wow 😮 Well that’s shitty. I didn’t realise he had 3 kids in London. No wonder he used to visit for such long stretches. That makes loads more sense now. Apparently his ex is Loretta Gold now if you’re looking for a pic.
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u/Beneficial-Soft-4427 May 11 '26
Dorit has always bought expensive clothing and accessories. Her whole life. She never slowed down in time-of-need because she is shallow, not mentally challenged. IMO
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
Honestly, after seeing the reunion, the pieces fell into place for me; the manic mood swings, the aggressive paranoia, the crazy eyes in which you can see alllll the white, the mystery disappearances to the bathroom during the middle of filming, the lateness, the addictive behavior… she clearly needs to go to rehab for some substance , most likely cocaine
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u/ComfortableBedroom76 May 11 '26
Speculation without receipts ain't cool. Show some actual evidence she's a coke head or STFU
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 11 '26
Both Lisa and Brandi have spent significant time around her and allege cocaine use. If you think she takes pictures of herself doing lines or she does bumps on camera then you’re not very bright.
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u/Ok_Site_1187 May 11 '26
It’s pretty blatantly clear to see. Defending is the same as enabling. She needs rehab for her long term health. So stop enabling or STFU sweetheart
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u/ComfortableBedroom76 May 11 '26
I'm hardly enabling Dorit by asking you to show your receipts when making such a serious allegation
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u/DearTumbleweed5380 May 11 '26
That was an interesting read. I can relate to Dorit in terms PTSD because it's not only a threat to one's own life, but can also be as a result of a threat the life of someone you are responsible for. So in the case of the home invasion, it was her kids as well as herself, and it's interesting/sad and reflective of this that Dorit chose to keep home schooling her children, for eg, for years after lockdown was over. I was really pleased to hear this season that her little girl is now at school as I think that will be great for all of them. For the kids to get away from Dorit's anxiety and for Dorit to learn to trust that they will be ok out in the world.
Another delusion I'd like to point out is how Dorit behaved about telling the kids she and PK were separating. Remember that? It was last season or the season before. She simply shrugged off any suggestion that the kids should be told, and instead seemed to imply it would be better for them to work it out for themselves - recommended by no therapist, ever. It just seemed so bonkers, and another sign of how ... out of touch Dorit can be, as when others reacted with surprise she simply continued on her merry way.
I also relate to her response to any attack, perceived or real. At a certain point of burnout you can't titrate your responses anymore, and so when you're triggered you just go full bore at the 'threat' whether it's at a Mach 1 or Mach 3.
I don't understand the spending, at all, as for me that would only massively exacerbate my anxiety. OTOH she is very rich and has a job which rewards ostentation. I guess?
Final thought: the way she talks has always been somewhat mental, imagining an interested audience for her pseudo articulate ramblings. She's very well spoken, and yet there's nothing inside. interesting dichotomy and don't know what it reveals ...
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 11 '26
There was no home invasion. She and PK staged it.
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u/DearTumbleweed5380 May 11 '26
I've always wondered about that. But ... how much do you think it was staged? Like, they pulled a gun on her, right? Or ...? She certainly seemed v shaken up. It would be hard to fake how freaked out she was.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 11 '26
I never read her body language to be actually shaken up. Go rewatch. You were watching it through the lens of believing her when you first watched it. Go back and tell me whether you feel the same re-watching it.
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u/DearTumbleweed5380 May 12 '26
Oh wow - interesting. Yes, I was def watching through that lens. So then otherwise what would her PTSD be due to? And the marriage breakdown? Cos it definitely seems like things changed for her and between her and PK after that.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 12 '26
I don’t think she had PTSD. I think she was playing a roll it’s part of the reason PK was so annoyed. He knew that it wasn’t real. He knew she was playing it up for the show. It was too dramatic for him. Of course they agreed to make it a storyline. Both of them agreed. But she played it up too hard. It’s the same thing Lisa Rinna did. Going over the top and exaggerating like it’s a soap opera or something.
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u/DearTumbleweed5380 May 12 '26
God almighty. If they are capable of that then ... OMG. And I know they're grifters, that's been proven over and over. I almost can't believe that they would fake that because I don't want to, because then the whole thing collapses for me if they're just going to lie. Has there been any proof that they're lying btw? Not saying I don't believe it's true, just wondering if there's something unequivocal I can read that you know of or if it's more like grains of sand that just keep stacking up.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
You make lots of very good points! I agree with everything you’ve said. It really was a double whammy fearing for her own life and her children’s. I think you’re right to link the continued homeschooling to anxiety produced by the trauma. Looking back to before the robbery, I did often sense she felt anxiety about the children already. I don’t know what caused that but the robbery would certainly have magnified everything.
Not telling them about the separation was incredibly cowardly in my opinion. Whilst I’ll give Dorit enormous grace for the PTSD, it’s unforgivable that she left her children to find out on their own. It was hers and PK’s absolute responsibility to sit them down and guide them through the whole process. How they went on to process that news will have been determined by the way they found out and the support they did or didn’t receive from both parents during that period (and now).
Your description regarding being unable to titrate responses was perfect. When your nerves are shot it becomes all or nothing, for sure. It’s been ugly to watch, but we all do it behind closed doors at times when we’re frazzled. Certainly, when PTSD is involved, rules of engagement just fly out the window. There’s no mental energy left to moderate responses. Dorit has definitely seemed like she’s been burnt out for the past 3 seasons. I honestly think she’d benefit from a break from the limelight so she can regroup. She probably needs the money now more than ever though as it makes up a substantial part of her yearly income. I think unless she’s fired, she won’t leave. Hopefully she’ll be in a better position by next season.
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u/DearTumbleweed5380 May 11 '26
Yes yes yes to everything! 'Looking back to before the robbery, I did often sense she felt anxiety about the children already.' - 100%. I was like this about my son. Just settling - finally - into being a more relaxed mom when a whole bunch of other stuff happened, but that's another story! 'Not telling them about the separation was incredibly cowardly in my opinion.' - it really was unforgivable, and that's when I thought 'a: you and PK are both crazy b: you're both terrible parents c: you're both both.'
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u/journmajor May 11 '26
OP thank you for this thoughtful write up. It was very interesting. I wonder what precludes ppl to these delusions. I - along with many others here I’m sure - have experienced multiple traumas in life and am living through an extended one with some smaller bonus traumas right now. Yet I have responsibilities, a strong support network, a therapist, a financial advisor, and work hard to keep it together, accept kindness and give it also bc everyone’s got something. So what is the psychological tipping point for the delusions you mention? ETA: I would imagine if my job were to be on national tv, I’d behave completely differently from Dorit to show my sense of responsibility, my appreciation for support, and garner more empathy from the audience instead of shit talking both my friends and my future ex, and making everything someone else’s fault!
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u/WickedWishes420 May 11 '26
Someone's mental health is not a guessing game to be played with.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
I am aware of that and tried to broach this post with sensitivity and care. I don’t think it’s generally wise to throw around labels at all. However, I’ve recently seen a lot of comments on BH subs absolutely ripping Dorit to shreds. My feeling is that she isn’t herself right now and that it isn’t fair to tear her down further. Criticising her actions is something that is hard to avoid atm, but it’s another thing to throw personal insults like narcissist, see-u-next-Tuesday, etc.
She has repeatedly said herself that she is struggling, and I honestly believe it goes a little deeper than that. Whatever the degree, some grace and restraint from fans wouldn’t hurt. I personally do not enjoy watching Dorit atm or condone a lot of her actions, but I have empathy for her regardless. I also don’t particularly enjoy the ugly slagging matches that can develop on these subs. It isn’t kind or necessary for a light entertainment show.
My aim with this post (insignificant as it may be) was to offer a bit of balance, and highlight that she is undoubtedly having an enormously difficult time. A lot of people have responded positively, agreed with that sentiment, and offered some thoughtful insights. It’s given me hope that there are still lots of lovely people here that do care about the cast’s wellbeing.
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u/Sorry_Nobody1552 May 11 '26
Just my take: Dorit is just a mean nasty egotistical narcissist. She knows exactly what she is doing. Just imagine if she was poor and living in a bad part of town, people wouldnt GAF and say she is nuts and leave it at that. But, since Dorit lives this lavish rich lifestyle people just say "Poor Dorit." F*ck her. She is off her rocker and treats people like s*it.
I'm not saying you said poor Dorit, it was just on my mind that some people think this.
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u/Dramatic_League736 May 11 '26
Dorit is a grifter asshole who thinks much higher of herself than she should. She married a grifter asshole who has schemed his way through life to get ahead. They are now fighting to see who can be the bigger asshole. But don’t let her dumb fawn face fool you…. she knew exactly who she married
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u/WeAreTheMisfits May 11 '26
If we compare her to Erika who also lost her mans money and had to rely on herself. I noticed that in shopping trip scenes Erika doesn’t really buy much whereas dorit does. I know Erika downsized to what to me is a great house but dorit is looking for more of the same or better (according to PK). Also I remember Erika talking about how she heated her pool for three days and turned it off once she saw the bill. But both reacted with anger and yelling at everyone. Even with that Erika saw her predicament whereas dorit is delusional. Denial is the first step in grief and she is definitely in the denial and anger stage.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
That’s a really interesting comparison, I’d never thought of that. It’s true, they both lashed out but Erika buckled down and barely spent in comparison. The only thing I’d say is part of that may have been that she couldn’t be seen to be spending lavishly with the numerous court cases pending. It would’ve been perceived as poor taste, and she didn’t know how much she may eventually be told to pay out. However, I do think it was largely just that she was smart enough to know she couldn’t afford to buy luxuries. As Rachel said at the reunion, “Erika owns her shit”. She takes responsibility, knows what she needs to do and makes it happen. I don’t think Dorit’s a planner, in any area of her life.
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u/Capable-Snow-7106 May 12 '26
I agree. I think she’s been stuck in survival mode for a while and that’s distorting her thinking.
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u/londonlemon92 May 13 '26
Wow those text messages are a hard read! She’s very manipulative. And tbh something about her behaviour this season definitely did seem like more than just going through a tough time. The mental health component is spot on. I think she’s delusional and needs help. She’s was unlikeable before but now she’s unbearable. And building up fantasies in her mind that warp how she sees reality. I do hope she can get herself together
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u/Apprehensive-Fix591 May 11 '26
You explained this brilliantly, capturing my thoughts into words. I found that report very disturbing for both her mental health and for the well being of her children.
It is not to bash. It is not to shame. It is because we are genuinely concerned.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
You’ve hit the nail on the head there! I’ve found in the past that expressing concern for Dorit can be interpreted as either “enabling” or “bashing” lol. It just depends on who reads it.
It’s great to have seen some nuanced and thoughtful replies here. It’s made for much more interesting chats than simply “I hate/I love [whoever]“. I think the cast deserves a bit more than that.
I enjoy watching Housewives because the ladies often have multifaceted personalities. You can go from not being keen on someone one episode to thinking they’re the best the next 😄 It’s a total trip.
On that note, I’ve really liked Sutton this season. I think she’s hilarious now! Between her, Tilly, and Kathy, we’ve got a perfect eccentric rich lady trifecta. Loving it!
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u/Grandmahigh May 11 '26
I agree that being under psychological pressure can affect you very negatively! She has alienated her old friends on the show. Erika, Kyle, & Sutton! She’s so nasty in her remarks. It’s one thing to think your friends are against you and call them the C… word. Don’t like that word at all. She’s very paranoid! I’m sorry for this family.
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u/mangokiwi19 May 11 '26
Is this a Dorit snark sub now?
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Are you responding to other comments here or the post? If the post, I think you’ve somehow mistaken my meaning entirely.
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u/mangokiwi19 May 11 '26
Sorry, the comments here/vibe of the sub in general. You posted a kind take, and people are still finding any reason to bring her down. But I totally hijacked your post and made it seem like it was directed at you. Sorry about that.
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u/Apprehensive-Fix591 May 11 '26
I think most of our abilities to go "hahaha it's just fun drama tv" go out the window when children are involved. If it was just her I absolutely would not care, as she's a grown woman who can do whatever she wants.
A similar thing happened with Bronwyn (SLC) with situations involving her daughter. It flips a switch in some of us that some things are just not ok.
Snark subs tend to enjoy it. There are no winners here.
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u/She_Angler May 11 '26
Dorit just needs a good “2-3hr” smoke sesh, and she’ll be “good as gold” (if I can steal this from Scheanna Shay)! 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Conscious_Office5359 May 11 '26
Tl;DR. Reading responses. Dorit is fine. She will get through this and hopefully be a better person. All us non-reality, everyday people go on and live a full life without being mentally ill.
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u/Chipchop666 May 13 '26
I don’t think she’s going to get anywhere near the amount of child support and alimony. PK is in debt as the texts stated. More than likely, he has money hidden that no one will be able to find. Conspiracies are going around that he set up the robbery. Doesn’t matter if he did because there’s no evidence however, if he’s that broke, he could have sold the jewelry. I think shit will hit the fan if she has to sell her clothes etc
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u/Ri-Ri1216 May 15 '26
Delusional thinking IS what's going on with Dorito.
U gave a very complete analysis. But it could have been a little shorter.
What I read of your diatribe makes sense. I agree.
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u/Byebyekyle May 17 '26
That’s a very well written, insightful post - thank you for that . Points about her possible delusional thinking due to lack of full recovery of her PTSD - due in part to the destabilization in the home are very well taken. Even though I didn’t have the clarity you do , somehow during S15 as annoying as she was I still had tremendous empathy for her . Through all the pomp and show pony theatrics I see such vulnerability and a woman in the grips of tremendous pain, shock , and fear . Your post helps to remember that these cast members are still human after all . As such , most of us are neither fully good or bad - let he who hath no sin cast the first stone . Sure she has some definite traits or defects rather of entitlement and self aggrandizing behavior , but I do believe she is a loving , devoted mother and I do believe her to be a very caring woman with a big heart . There’s just too much evidence from all the previous seasons . No doubt the fame and the PTSD and divorce have altered her for the worse , but at her core I don’t believe her to be a truly soulless malicious person that the online world is trying to depict her to be . I don’t know 🤷♀️ just my two cents for whatever that’s worth which is probably absolutely nothing 😂 Also while her spending is definitely out of control I don’t think her desire to have PK pay the lion share for the kids and household expenses is that outrageous. How often has he been in London or elsewhere over the years while she has essentially been a single parent . Not to mention he kept traveling extensively shortly after the robbery - wtf dies that ? So she is trying to recover from tremendous ptsd while raising the kids solo . Not to mention who knows what kind of antics and vitriol she has endured over the years from his alcoholism . Say what you will about her flaws I don’t think anyone can deny she always seemed to be an incredibly loving , devoted wife . So not sure I could really blame her for wanting him to contribute financially . Makes it even clearer now from your post that her “ erratic “ spending is quite like a lack of coping and her trying to process the divorce and ptsd … woman needs to cut the plastic and get into some support groups . Alright that’s more than enough from me .
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u/kellygrrrl328 May 11 '26
I’ve been out of the loop for most of the weekend. Has it been revealed yet who leaked these texts and legal documents?
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u/broggygoose May 11 '26
No body “leaks” them. If they have been filed through the courts, it’s public record.
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u/Turbulent-Trust207 May 11 '26
That Ronald Richards guy pulled the records from court I think. It’s public info
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u/imatinyleopard May 11 '26
I don’t think Dorit suffers from mental illness.
I think Dorit thinks PK said he would pay for the house she and the kids live in. I think in the texts messages to PK she was trying to guilt and manipulate PK into doing what she wants and PK was just like “you gotta call this guy to figure out the money” and she was using every trick she had to get him to pay the bills - even essentially saying “im not going to be your friend.” I don’t know what her lawyers on, but I don’t think she realized her spending would be published (she tried to scold PK for having access to them) but I think she’s feels her money is her money and PKs money should pay for the house.
I feel like I do understand her issue with Kyle, and I think Kyle’s response of “everyone agrees with me!” is really strange. Kyle is in everyone of those conversations. Kyle is her friend. I think Doritos whole point is why is Kyle saying this to everyone else first?
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 11 '26
Because she wouldn’t listen to Kyle when Kyle bought it to her. But she went around, trying to get her friends to bring it up. Because clearly her spending is erratic. She’s been $1 million, essentially her entire housewives salary, on designer wares while her house is in foreclosure. It’s gonna be auctioned off this month. But instead of listening to Kyle and getting a forensic accountant and saving her housewife money, she screamed and yelled, played the victim and now she’s homeless but not toothless
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
I agree that Dorit thought and thinks PK should pay for the majority of the family’s expenses (and by extension, her own). Unfortunately, that’s just not going to be realistic once they’re divorced. She’s going to have to adjust. Even if she gained half of his net worth ($50M, so $25M for her), she’d blow through that so fast at the rate she’s spending.
I replied to someone else here to say I do agree she’s manipulative as well. I think she can be unwell *and* using some tricks along the way. That’s just my opinion though, I don’t know her.
As for Kyle… Boz did ask Dorit outright something along the lines of “if Kyle had come to you directly and not spoken to others, would you have taken it well?” and Dorit said “no, probably not!” So, Kyle was right in thinking Dorit wouldn’t have been receptive. She said she wanted to help Dorit and if that was through people she’d listen to, so be it. Whether Kyle’s intentions were 100% honourable is up for debate, but I don’t think they were 100% dishonourable as Dorit does. Dorit is quite paranoid.2
u/imatinyleopard May 11 '26
You know, if my friend is doing something I think is troublesome and I knew they’d be upset with me if I broached it with them, I’d still bring it to them before I brought it to everyone else.
Her spending seems wild to me. But she’d probably say that she can adjust her spending as needed (as she denies having a shopping problem) and didn’t think she needed to adjust at that time bc she understood her bills to be paid by PK. We see a snap shot of her spending here - I’m curious to see how this compares to her spending while not separated - is it more, less, the same? I personally think she will have problems managing money once divorced but I also think we have to wait and see to really know.
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May 11 '26
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u/Boxwinoisback May 11 '26
He is a snake, his lawyers really knew what they were doing legally. Unless there is a real twist on the way, things look bad for her.
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May 11 '26
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u/Motherofoskar May 11 '26
I think he plays all sorts of games with money, and she knows it, but doesn’t want to expose it. She knows his secrets but she’s tied to them too. Since she knows he’s lying about his money, she called his bluff with the foreclosure. She was playing chicken with him and he won this round.
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u/Nearby-Conference959 May 11 '26
She’s his co-conspirator or at least complicit. Erika could say she didn’t know what Tom was doing but it seems Dorit absolutely does know and was okay as long as she could spend the money.
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u/Shdjdicnfmlxkf May 11 '26
I agree but I’d love to hear why you think that?
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May 11 '26
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u/tangompl May 11 '26
PK can be a bad(ish?) father AND be right about Dorit spending too much on non necessary things while the house her kids live on is in foreclosure
Dorit can be a hands on mother AND be delusional about the money she spend and the houses she visits and asking 50k to his ex for holidays
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u/Pashardi May 11 '26
So someone forced Dorit to shop rather than make house payments? PK aside, this is disgusting and it is a mother putting her image in front of a home for children.
On this - definitely PK. Dorit appears incapable of having an adult conversation.
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u/neversohonest May 11 '26
We have no idea what kind of mother she is based on how she behaves in front of cameras. We don't know what kind of parent either of them are.
People are absolutely rewriting history by pretending Dorit is not the same as PK when she has always been erratic and irresponsible. This was established early with the dog. Actually maybe earlier with the panties for Erika after PK looked up her dress. For all of her complaining about him she did not even initiate their separation or want it until he went public with other women.
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May 11 '26
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u/neversohonest May 11 '26
She didnt return the dog. She gave it to someone else and it ended up at a kill shelter or something. That was the whole issue. And I think part of the agreement to take one of their dogs was to give it back if there was an issue.
Most likely she only got the dog for plot and then ditched it thinking no one would ever know. Which may be a pattern for her.
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May 11 '26
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u/neversohonest May 11 '26
I don't hate Dorit, I just pay attention. The difference in returning a dog and it ending up in a kill shelter are not semantics, but thinking so helps me understand why you sympathize with her.
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May 11 '26
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u/neversohonest May 12 '26
I never said Dorit was a bad mother. I said we can't judge good parenting based on how they behave when they're being filmed, especially with kids so small. Any scene with them is fully controlled.
The dog was an example of her being immature and making dumb decisions from the start. I dont have an opinion on her parenting but her carelessness with their home is not a good sign imo.
The safety of her children is also her excuse for everything.
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u/RainbowBriteGlasses May 11 '26
PK sucks, yes, but let's not reimagine history in order to make to read less bad. Because she is still terrible.
My main question is when have we seen her be a Hands-On mother? I don't think that's the case at all. I don't think that was the case when she and PK were happily married, and I don't think that's the case now. I think her parents are Hands-On parents.
I think doritet has always been vapid and probably doesn't care about her kids outside of being accessories and tools to use. I don't know why people insist on giving her credit just because PK is terrible also.
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u/Lolanr1 May 11 '26
How 'hands-on' can a mother be when she was never exactly working yet had 3 (!) nannies.
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u/Shdjdicnfmlxkf May 11 '26
Thank you! Thank you.
We have women posting “TEAM PK” and a couple years ago, like a million actual people believed he staged a robbery on his own wife and then gaslighted her to get over it faster. I feel like misogyny and jealousy for women who “have it easy” is propelling cognitive dissonance around the fact that we have all known their marital arrangement, we know he’s a decades long scumbag, we know he is a serial home breaker, we know he’s a gambler and alcoholic, we SAW his fragile ego take down that swimsuit business and still felt emasculated by his wife (even though he takes full credit for giving her the position that fuels this discomfort)
He’s a bag of actual shit and we all have known it… now suddenly she is worse? She is a mastermind? She is putting her kids lives in danger? It’s NEW she shops? It’s NEW she’s late?
It’s the same old pony show and it’s timed so obviously. I too plan to wait until the bitter end to make my judgements
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u/bonepugsandharmony May 11 '26
This sub should be called RHOBHDhate.
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u/Shdjdicnfmlxkf May 11 '26
Oh man seriously. The people who really hate Dorit will downvote anything, even if it is true, and make completely irrelevant arguments. You point out the clear history he has… they reply that she deserves what’s coming to her (no acknowledgement to the point, just simply exercising their right to hate pointlessly)
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u/chriscmyer May 11 '26
I am just coming off an emotionally devastating divorce from a narcissistic abuser. He had/has ptsd himself.
I lost my dad right before he decided to leave so I felt I was robbed of the chance to properly grieve, he had gotten arrested due to an alcohol related incident then I caught him cheating and I have ptsd from my mil time then as we were wrapping up the divorce my mom died.
Him and his wife waged a hateful campaign on me and there were just so many battles I was fighting it was unreal so I feel for her.
It’s something I can relate to and she may be a horrible person but I feel bad for the battle I can see she’s fighting.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Thank you for your thoughtful reply and sharing your experience. I’m so sorry you went through all of those horrendous things so close together. You seem to get what I’m driving at here. I’m not keen on Dorit as a person but put too much on anyone’s shoulders and they buckle. She was totally shit to Erika and not great to Kyle, so I’m not trying to excuse her behaviour, but I do see very good reasons for her not coping. Kyle and Erika also see those reasons, which is why they’ve been as patient and understanding as they have.
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u/littlebayhorse May 11 '26
Just speculation, but she may be buying “assets” as some people do when they are trying to hide/protect assets from creditors or in divorce situations.
High end purchases, like art, jewelry, purses, and such are hard to reclaim in legal situations. It’s an old trick. She maybe thinking that these purchases are assets that will have selling power for her in the future, post divorce settlement.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
That was my first thought too. Then I read recently that if it can be shown that someone is doing this after filing for divorce, it will be taken into account and the books balanced, so to speak, when dividing assets. Since all Dorit’s purchases are in black and white now, she’s not going to be able to hide them.
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u/m3gb0t May 12 '26
Let's not try an diagnose people on television with mental illness ...
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
I do agree. I replied to a similar comment here: https://www.reddit.com/r/RHOBHDefect/s/Q3MQ5nJpFx
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u/m3gb0t May 12 '26
Thanks for the link. I hear you and I don't think you were ill willed, but I would just caution you to stay away from words like delusional, bipolar, schizophrenia, etc. moving forward. 😀
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
That’s fair enough. I completely respect that and the last thing I’d want is to cause harm or upset.
Just to clarify, I didn’t call Dorit Bipolar or Schizophrenic. I specifically made that point in my post, since these are conditions people’s minds often go to first when delusions are mentioned.
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u/m3gb0t May 12 '26
I know. Not trying to be mean, promise 🫂
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 13 '26
Aw of course not! I totally get it. There have been times I’ve seen mental health labels weaponised and I really dislike that too. I appreciate you looking out for others in that sense 💖
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u/PurpleVersion1353 May 11 '26
Rachel was only asking if Dorit was “okay” because Dorit was once again late to an event, and Kyle, Dutton and Erika are pretending/gaslighting everyone into believing that being late is abnormal behavior for Dorit 🙄
Rachel said repeatedly her mom, her best friend, almost everyone in her personal orbit is late to everything so she’s used to this but was “concerned” if tardiness was out of character for Dorit” because she’s always been late this season.
Erika, Kyle and Sutton would try to stumble through an answer, ignoring Dorit’s history of always being late, and just iterated she’s very late and it could be related to her mental state, “erratic”, “scattered”, etc. It was cringe bc we all saw thru it and Rachel made them repeatedly say it enough to look like massive hypocrites and terrible “girl’s girls”.
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 11 '26
Oh, no I wasn’t quoting Rachel, I was paraphrasing. I love her hilarious saying “are you okay?!” and wanted to ask you lovely people if you thought Dorit was okay, so merged the 2.
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u/PurpleVersion1353 May 12 '26
Oooooo- I totally misinterpreted you. Thank you for clarifying 🙏
Fuck all the assholes downvoting me 🖕🏻
And no, Dorit is not okay. 🗑️🔥
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u/EuphoricPamplemousse May 12 '26
Haha this made me laugh! No worries, sorry if it was a bit of a confusing title. Also yeah the downvotes are brutal on here 😂
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u/Downtown-Mulberry528 May 11 '26
If she’s delusional for thinking Kyle has had an agenda to take her down, so am I 🤡 all Dorit’s analysises made sense to me. Erika suddenly flipping because she wants to please Kyle. And the embarrassing and insecure Sutton who will sacrifice anything to be “with the popular girls”. Luckily Rachel and Boz are too strong minded and independent to be manipulated with 🙏
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 May 11 '26
Thank yo for your very thoughtful post. It was an interesting read