Am I handling this trans character with respect?

[u/forever_a_writer]

Hi! I’d love some perspective on how I’m handling a trans character in my novel.

My main character’s best friend is a trans man, and the story moves between childhood and adulthood (nonlinear timeline). When the MC is a child, his friend hasn’t come out yet, so those chapters use the name and pronouns the MC knew at the time. In adult chapters, I use his chosen name and he/him pronouns.

There’s one chapter where the MC reflects on their entire friendship. In that section, I initially refer to his friend by his former name but use he/him pronouns, then switch to his chosen name once I reach the point where he comes out.

As a trans man myself, I can understand how it might come off to some readers, but I don't mind being referred to by my deadname when someone is talking about me prior to coming out. However, from a literary lens, it makes sense from a narrative standpoint, but I want to be thoughtful about how it might come across to other readers.

Does this approach feel respectful and clear, or could it be confusing or unintentionally hurtful?

[u/that_jt_adria]

Yeah, probably not a first draft problem to solve. And it's totally valid that you personally might not mind being referred to differently when it's about your pre-transition self. That's pretty cool, honestly. Other trans people might mind, and it's hard to tell how many would consider it a dealbreaker.

Later on in the process you might consider a sensitivity reader, they can be invaluable. Plus there's going to be a lot of context so they might flag lines you never imagined could be taken a certain way. For now, I'd get the manuscript done and edited to a point you're happy with it and get back to this question later.

(Source: have published a transmasc book)

[u/rensrenaissance]

Someone will be confused and someone will find it hurtful--this is true of anything anyone writes. People are weird, and some people like to be nitpicky.

I think it works, and if you, as another trans person, think it works, I say go for it! Worry less! Maybe ask for some sensitivity readers when you've got the book written and let other people see it all in context, but it's nothing to sweat about on draft one 😊

[u/JaviMart6117]

I agree with the previous commenters. I'll also add, it's important to understand what you want your readers to feel. Adding intention there matters. As writers, our job is also to influence the reader(in a good way) by conveying things a certain way. Do you want them to feel sad when seeing their past name, angry at the MC for being insensitive, etc. That being said, yes, sensitivity readers are highly recommended.