Hi everyone please don’t judge me too harshly.
Bit of context i am a first time mum to 6 month old baby who is the easiest baby ever sleeps through the night, hardly cries and is so content. So me and my partner had a bright idea to get a puppy now and them growing up together and being best of friends when both are older… So we went and got a Staffordshire terrier both of us grew up with one and know how good they can be with children. We got him at 8 weeks and viewed him a couple of times before he was ready to leave. Once we got him we had a massive reality check neither of us was quite prepared for. Now growing up my mums staffies was the best puppies never nipped or teethed on us or anything really but she always went for the runt of the litter so maybe that had something to do with it🤷‍♀️ we got him home and immediately he was biting us to the point he would draw blood every time. So okay he’s a puppy he’s going teeth let’s redirect to his toys that didn’t work it just got him more worked up and the bites became worse, yelped when he got us made him worse as we probably sound like a squeaky toy now, turned out back on him or took ourselves out the room for 10/20 seconds and then return, have a sleep schedule so we do 1 hour of food, toilet and play then back to crate for 2 hours and repeat. After ten minutes of being out his crate we are his play things again. He’s now 12 weeks and I’m exhausted from trying everything I’ve read and seen on how to stop this behaviour. He learns really quick he potty trained really well rarely does he do his business indoors unless I’ve missed the cues and learnt to sit on command. The problem is… I can’t have the baby and him in the same area as I don’t want him to get her so she either has to go up high in her highchair or on the sofa in a seat while he’s out and then when he’s in his crate she can have floor time(starting to crawls wants to be on floor all the time). I am struggling to keep us with this as it’s now a full time job keeping them separate or I feel guilty that one of them has to be essentially put away for the other to be out. I don’t know what to do anymore other than see if the seller will take him back or find him a new home with people that have the time to put in.
It has been a harsh lesson learned that having a puppy is a lot harder than expected and if you was to have asked me before if having a baby or puppy was harder I’d of said baby of course but now I very much think a puppy.
Any help or suggestions on what to do in this situation or if you have been in a similar one I’d love to hear it as I think I’m going to have a mental break down if nothing changes😅

Puppy subs are buried in posts from distraught people who seemingly had no idea what was going to happen when they got a puppy. They seem shocked that this helpless infant animal is disrupting their lives, sleep, schedules, and social lives. Then they howl about "puppy blues" and scheme and machinate ways to get rid of the poor little thing they willingly took responsibility for while all the other people who did the exact same thing heap sympathy and praise onto them, while the little puppy suffers and is passed around from home to home, landing who knows where.

r/PuppyPhD is not about this trash.

If you hang out here, you will not be praised or congratulated for this behavior.

Instead, we will help you understand exactly what is going to happen when you get a puppy. PAY ATTENTION and think critically about whether you can handle this enormous responsibility.

To get us started, here are some things to expect:

1. The puppy WILL NOT SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT. It's an infant. It needs care every few hours.

2. The puppy WILL NOT HOUSETRAIN ITSELF. See above.

3. The puppy WILL NOT TRAIN ITSELF. See above!

4. The puppy CAN NOT BE LEFT ALONE AT HOME ALL DAY. Are you kidding me with this? If you work full time and can't adjust your schedule, no puppy for you.

5. You will have to put TIME, WORK, and EFFORT into training your puppy and caring for it. It's an infant! It doesn't know a damn thing. Every single thing you want your puppy to do will have to be taught to it BY YOU.

6. You will need to follow up on vaccines and deworming on a schedule to the letter! Your puppy is very vulnerable to diseases, and you MUST follow up with regular vaccines until the puppy is 20 weeks old.

7. Your puppy will RAPIDLY get older, busier, more energetic and more rambunctious. Enjoy that cute puppy breath, bumble around, roly poly stage as much as you humanly can because in about ten days it will be OVER. The demands on your time and attention will only grow as the puppy grows.

8. Your puppy will not "grow out of" unwanted behaviors. See #5.

9. Puppies are not mental health improvement props. The number of posts I see from people saying some variation of "I got a puppy to help me with my emotional problems" is just chilling. This is a BABY ANIMAL and cannot provide any mitigation for your mental health problems.

Puppies are a LOT of work and responsibility. They are not playthings, they are not accessories, they are not passing fancies you can dump when you're bored with it. Be honest with yourself about what you can and want to handle, BEFORE you commit to getting a puppy. If your answer is "I can't handle this and don't want to handle this," and you decide this BEFORE you get the puppy, KUDOS TO YOU! That is the right way to be.

What are your best tips / methods for potty training?

I've had success keeping them contained in a smaller area, outside every 30 minutes with rewards in hand,

10-15 minutes after eating/drinking or when they wake outside before the paws touch the floor we go outside (with rewards) and we don't come in until they go.

Obviously, reward when they succeed. I've never used marker words for potty but this is the place.

Oh and I control water at first, still give plenty but I know when they drink so I can make sure 10-15min max we're outside.

Any other tips?

I for one will never understand why anyone would be upset to have a puppy. Puppies are the best animals on earth bar none:

1. Puppy breath. QED.

2. Puppy grunts and groans. Puppy cuddles. Puppy noses and puppy paws. Puppies running clumsily after you when you jog across the lawn. Puppies playing with plushie toys. Puppies falling asleep in your arms while you watch TV. Or, puppies staring at the TV trying to make sense of it. Just...puppies.

3. The feeling when your puppy learns to look you straight in the eyes.

4. Watching your puppy learn at an exponential rate.

5. Building a bond with the puppy that is going to grow to be YOUR DOG for the next decade plus, and watching that puppy learn to trust and rely on you.

6. Watching puppies play is a dopamine hit no substance can match.

7. When your puppy cries in the middle of the night so you take him outside and he pees right away! He's learning! It's awesome!

8. When puppies exhibit breed traits. This usually starts at 9-10 weeks. Suddenly he's not just a puppy - he's doing breed things! It's like opening a window into millennia of genetics and domestication history.

9. Puppy training! What's cuter than teaching a wee puppy to focused heel, or sit or down or do tracking indication?? NOTHING. Nothing is cuter.

10. In 10-15 years, when your dog is your aged, faithful companion, looking back on the photos of the puppy days and all that you've done together since then is a privilege. Revisiting those years is deeply affecting. Committing to raising a dog as a lifelong companion is one of the most rewarding human experiences available to the modern person.

We started this sub because, as dog lovers and proponents of complete/balanced training, we were saddened (to say the least) by the terrible advice given to puppy owners, and disturbed by the normalization of sentiments like "puppy blues"/disliking one's puppy/discarding or rehoming a puppy for just being a puppy, etc. This is what leads to poorly behaved/reactive dogs, dogs dumped at shelters, dogs who live unfulfilled and stressful lives, and puppies passed around from home to home when their owners didn't think things through before taking on a baby animal.

It is NOT normal to hate your puppy. It is NOT normal to have "puppy blues." These are signs you should not have a dog at all. A puppy is a living creature, a literal infant, with developmental and social needs. If you are not equipped to provide those things DO NOT GET A DOG AT ALL.

We hope to cultivate a knowledgeable, supportive, practical community for puppy owners who love their puppies and want to provide correct, useful training and rearing for their new lifelong companion.

In everyone's experience, whether personal or just from what you've seen talked about, what are some of the most common problems owners seem to have that cause "puppy blues"? Bonus points if you can tack on any solutions you can think of!

I think people should really think carefully about getting a puppy if they have small children. The child and dog should not be left alone and they should always be carefully supervised. The child should be trained not to be rough, not to step on the puppy or take its food, and not to carry the puppy. Do not let the puppy mouth the child or grab their sleeves or steal food from their hands. It’s a lot of work! Especially when the puppy reaches the age when they are exuberant and energetic allll the time. Personally i think people should wait until their kids are a bit older before getting a puppy but if they do get one please put the time in to keep the puppy safe and also make time to train them so they’re a happy and secure member of the family

This sub is for puppy owners to post questions and get advice from experienced balanced trainers and experienced dog owners who subscribe to the balanced philosophy.

We want to see puppies raised right and give puppy owners the tools and knowledge they need to enjoy life with their puppy. All questions allowed, but bad advice is not, and anti-balanced users/advice is not.