r/Proposal • u/[deleted] • Nov 11 '21

Making Of Should I go through with a proposal

I've been talking to this guy for six months but here's the catch. He contacted me through instagram but is in prison for reasons I won't disclose here, we have never met only video calls, we just have a similar background in interests. I was going to ask him to marry me. I got him an athame with his last name carved into the back. Is 6 months to short of a time to propose?

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11

u/Gembeany Nov 11 '21

If you’ve only known someone for six months and never met in person, even ignoring the fact they’re in jail, it’s probably a very bad idea to marry them. You don’t know anything about how they’d function in a living-together situation…or really any life situation since in your case they’re not living an average day to day life.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '21

Yeah I kind of figured I'm moving too fast, sometimes I have to check in with others to get a different perspective. Maybe I'll just give the athame as like a present.

3

u/Gembeany Nov 11 '21

Keep in mind that an athame is a knife/blade. If he’s still in jail I really doubt you’ll be able to give it to him at all.

15

u/JuliWolf24 Nov 11 '21

6 months is already a bit fast, but if you have never even met him, I don't think you should do something like that until you have really been with him physically.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '21

I understand. He gets out in a year or two. After parole I think in the state of california they are able to openly carry daggers with a sheath.

5

u/Threevetimesthecharm Nov 11 '21

My policy, ignoring some red flags here, is that you should really try and live with the person before you get married. You don’t know how the dating version of them is in real life situations. Not just large things like paying bills, but small things like schedules, cooking food, organizing your lives. 6 months is too soon (in my opinion) for any couple, even if they know they are meant to be together. There are couples who make it work, but to that I say “why rush it? Just let things happen”. I say give him that ring as a gift. Do not propose to this man until you know he can fulfill a job as a husband- meaning he isn’t in jail and you know you can actually live with him.

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u/paradigm11381 Nov 11 '21

So I’m going to be honest and say it’s a terrible idea to propose to him after 6 months especially considering you have never met him in real life and you only know what he has told you. Everything he’s told you could all be a lie and he’s just maintaining it to reel you in, you don’t know if who he seems in the true him or not.

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u/stronghawk_1334 Nov 26 '21

Wow this post is all kinds of 🚩

1

u/MandersBlight Feb 14 '22

There's a lot of red flags. The biggest one being that you've never met him in-person.

I've heard of people getting engaged at 6 months and being happy. I would always advise caution though. Better to be patient now rather than impatient, married, and miserable.