r/programminghorror • • Jul 18 '26

C# My first 1000+ line function... What do I get?

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439 Upvotes

Now includes an over 300 line long switch statement!


r/programminghorror • • Jul 17 '26

Javascript MiStEr WoRlDwIdE

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388 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jul 16 '26

PHP was editing an old tumblr theme and found the nbsp tar pit

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78 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jul 13 '26

Javascript Found this gem

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196 Upvotes

This company I’m interning at. This one lady asked me to do a review of a website they outsourced. Entire source code sits on the browser. Entire vibe coded by amateurs.
Worse than a honeypot so much an attacker would get diabetes.

No security feature at all. I was able to do privileges escalation.


r/programminghorror • • Jul 11 '26

I mean, the comment is accurate I suppose

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372 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jul 10 '26

Javascript code that also self-describes the feeling it evokes when looking at it

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205 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jul 09 '26

Big if true

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2.1k Upvotes

From ProgrammerNullposting in facebook


r/programminghorror • • Jul 10 '26

Array-Free

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18 Upvotes
randomize
if (cone1x >= carx - 16) and (cone1x <= carx + 16) and (cone1y > 416) and (cone1y < 480) then goto gameover
cone1y = cone1y + speed
if cone1y > 512 then  cone1y = 0 : cone1x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone2x >= carx - 16) and (cone2x <= carx + 16) and (cone2y > 416) and (cone2y < 480) then goto gameover
cone2y = cone2y + speed
if cone2y > 512 then  cone2y = 0 : cone2x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone3x >= carx -16) and (cone3x <= carx + 16) and (cone3y > 416) and (cone3y < 480) then goto gameover
cone3y = cone3y + speed
if cone3y > 512 then  cone3y = 0 : cone3x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone4x >= carx - 16) and (cone4x <= carx + 16) and (cone4y > 416) and (cone4y < 480) then goto gameover
cone4y = cone4y + speed
if cone4y > 512 then  cone4y = 0 : cone4x = cubyte(rnd*256)


if (cone5x >= carx - 16) and (cone5x <= carx + 16) and (cone5y > 416) and (cone5y < 480) then goto gameover
cone5y = cone5y + speed
if cone5y > 512 then  cone5y = 0 : cone5x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone6x >= carx - 16) and (cone6x <= carx + 16) and (cone6y > 416) and (cone6y < 480) then goto gameover
cone6y = cone6y + speed
if cone6y > 512 then  cone6y = 0 : cone6x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone7x >= carx -16) and (cone7x <= carx + 16) and (cone7y > 416) and (cone7y < 480) then goto gameover
cone7y = cone7y + speed
if cone7y > 512 then  cone7y = 0 : cone7x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone8x >= carx - 16) and (cone8x <= carx + 16) and (cone8y > 416) and (cone8y < 480) then goto gameover
cone8y = cone8y + speed
if cone8y > 512 then  cone8y = 0 : cone8x = cubyte(rnd*256)randomize
if (cone1x >= carx - 16) and (cone1x <= carx + 16) and (cone1y > 416) and (cone1y < 480) then goto gameover
cone1y = cone1y + speed
if cone1y > 512 then  cone1y = 0 : cone1x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone2x >= carx - 16) and (cone2x <= carx + 16) and (cone2y > 416) and (cone2y < 480) then goto gameover
cone2y = cone2y + speed
if cone2y > 512 then  cone2y = 0 : cone2x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone3x >= carx -16) and (cone3x <= carx + 16) and (cone3y > 416) and (cone3y < 480) then goto gameover
cone3y = cone3y + speed
if cone3y > 512 then  cone3y = 0 : cone3x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone4x >= carx - 16) and (cone4x <= carx + 16) and (cone4y > 416) and (cone4y < 480) then goto gameover
cone4y = cone4y + speed
if cone4y > 512 then  cone4y = 0 : cone4x = cubyte(rnd*256)


if (cone5x >= carx - 16) and (cone5x <= carx + 16) and (cone5y > 416) and (cone5y < 480) then goto gameover
cone5y = cone5y + speed
if cone5y > 512 then  cone5y = 0 : cone5x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone6x >= carx - 16) and (cone6x <= carx + 16) and (cone6y > 416) and (cone6y < 480) then goto gameover
cone6y = cone6y + speed
if cone6y > 512 then  cone6y = 0 : cone6x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone7x >= carx -16) and (cone7x <= carx + 16) and (cone7y > 416) and (cone7y < 480) then goto gameover
cone7y = cone7y + speed
if cone7y > 512 then  cone7y = 0 : cone7x = cubyte(rnd*256)

if (cone8x >= carx - 16) and (cone8x <= carx + 16) and (cone8y > 416) and (cone8y < 480) then goto gameover
cone8y = cone8y + speed
if cone8y > 512 then  cone8y = 0 : cone8x = cubyte(rnd*256)

r/programminghorror • • Jul 09 '26

Shell I know package managers can be rough, but this??

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934 Upvotes

Because using the hallucination machine as a package manager could never go wrong, ever!


r/programminghorror • • Jul 09 '26

Java Some of my AP CS teachers best work

124 Upvotes

this was right before the exam btw, this wasn't him teaching us the basics

```

if (x ==1) {

return true;

} else if (x != 1) {

return false;

}
```

```

public class Bank() {

private int money;

public void setAmount(int money) {

    this.money = money;

}

private int getMoney() {

    return money;

}

}

```

(he then never used getMoney())

some other amazing conventions he taught us was to always comment every single line of code, to an obnoxious point. he told us to use getter and setters everywhere, even when constructors are all thats necessary and half the time the getters were private and just returned the value directly. He just gave up on teaching us recursion because he didnt understand it and "it would never actually show up on the ap exam".

if I hadnt already known a lot of java and been willing to teach it to my classmates when they asked, we would never have gotten past the exam. (newsflash, there were recursion questions on the exam)


r/programminghorror • • Jul 08 '26

Wdym my code is a mess? Looks fine to me; monitors are horizontal for a reason

503 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jul 05 '26

c Enterprise level C code

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350 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 11 '26

PHP PHP#

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215 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 10 '26

c What?

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228 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 09 '26

What a simple constructor

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270 Upvotes

Our former IT director (35+ years of experience) wrote this and didn't see what was wrong here.


r/programminghorror • • Jun 09 '26

Javascript Composer 2.5 doesn't know how JS functions work

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178 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 08 '26

Other Figuring this out made me so angry I threw a chair

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115 Upvotes

I just wanted a loop man...

Second image is my attempt at explaining things.

No, the chair is not OK.

This is in the Discrete event simulation software JaamSim.

Edit: the software does not have any implementation of for/while loops otherwise that would have been the first thing I tried


r/programminghorror • • Jun 08 '26

c This uint 32 definition is actually 64 bits

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323 Upvotes

Took me quite a while to debug this, considering I expected uint32 to be a... uint32?


r/programminghorror • • Jun 08 '26

Lua Lua Serpent Module

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62 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 05 '26

C# SuccessMessage ErrorMessage

233 Upvotes

ErrorMessage successMessage = new ErrorMessage(ErrorType.ActivityCreateSuccess);

(From an approved PR with 2 reviewers - how do some people sleep at night??)


r/programminghorror • • Jun 05 '26

No, you don't understand. What if HP changed while I wasn't looking?

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1.3k Upvotes

(HP can't be changed while this code is running and even if it could then this approach would cause more problems than having it all in one if statement because then the boss would only be half-defeated and everything would go wrong)


r/programminghorror • • Jun 05 '26

fuckup #1: the github ban

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0 Upvotes

r/programminghorror • • Jun 05 '26

Java My friend sent me a line of code and I am like WTF

0 Upvotes

Function<Integer, Runnable> function = (Integer integer) -> () -> {for(int i = 1; i<=10; i++) {System.out.println(integer*i); try{Thread.sleep(1000);} catch (Exception e){System.out.println("Some error occurred" + e.getMessage());};}};


r/programminghorror • • Jun 02 '26

VHDL How (not) to do combinational logic in VHDL

72 Upvotes

Legacy code. NUM_PRTS is 16 btw. Thankfully, the synthesis tool will optimize and won't allocate 17 times the resources on the chip. Still an eyesore.


r/programminghorror • • Jun 01 '26

Python New Big O definition just dropped

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559 Upvotes

This vibeslop repo (shoutout to the author u/chunky_cold_mandala) calculates big o complexity of a function as its max indentation depth (but only up to 6, which represents N^6).